The Film

I’ll start by saying that I had to control my bladder during the whole film because I was stupid enough not to take a trip to the restroom beforehand. If some facts are a little skewed, it might have been because I was willing myself not to sprint to the bathroom and to watch the entire movie. Maybe that’s why I didn’t sob; only a few tears around my eyes and a trembling lower lip.

Seeing Dobby’s grave made me tear up… again. I thought it was a bit rushed, with Hermione’s nearly immediate transformation into Bellatrix, but I enjoyed the Griphook/Harry/Ollivander banter. Helena playing Hermione playing Bellatrix was brilliant, in every way shape and form. MY QUEEN FOR LIFE. I also enjoyed Griphook berating Hermione’s greeting and Ron’s subsequent anger at him: “You’re Bellatrix Lestrange, not a dewy-eyed school girl!” I wish Ron would have gotten to talk in his faux foreign accent; that would have garnered a few laughs. As for Gringotts: it looks a lot shinier and new than when we saw it last. The goblin’s are more spruced up. Not sure whether I liked this or not; it’s not a huge detail, me thinks. As for the 3D in this scene, it felt like you were inside of the invisibility cloak when different angles of the camera were switched up. That was pretty cool. However, as for the imperius business… what’s up with the gruesome stench that overcomes the goblin’s face after he’s cursed? Is everyone able to see the yellowish green fumes, or just the caster of the unforgivable curse? A sudden change of facial expression would have pleased me more.

One thing that I loved was the hectic, wild ride through Gringotts that everyone must take to their vault. It wasn’t in the first film at all, really, so I appreciated this addition. The scene in the vault and with the dragon were some of the best in the film. I felt a bit of pity for the poor creature: blind, trapped, and terrified by noisemakers. The vault was glorious and the gemino curse’s effects, Harry subsequently becoming buried, was brilliant. I assume they didn’t include the flagrante curse in the film because it would have been a bit gruesome: burns all over the trio… ick. Hermione’s stroke of brilliance to fly away on the dragon was only second to the genius of the special effects team, who made everything look organic and not at all cheesy. The chandelier in the lobby of the bank moving about while the goblins worked away, oblivious that a dragon was smashing a makeshift elevator from the bottom floor to the top, was utterly hilarious.

Moving on, the landscape that the trio landed in after ditching the dragon was truly beautiful… once again, cheers for special effects. Also, there were quite a few cheers for a shirtless Dan Rad and Rupert. The urgency really sunk in at this point, only to slowly sink deeper and deeper as the film progressed. The apparition into Hogsmeade and the small bout of trouble before Aberforth saves the trio was shorter than I wanted it to be. I particularly wanted to see Aberforth save them from dementors and attempt to pass off his goat patronus as a stag.

Coming to The Hog’s Head, and how Harry nearly instantly knew that Aberforth was Dumbledore’s brother, was a bit unsettling. The chosen one was a bit too quick on the uptake for my taste on this one. I was fine with Hermione being a bit more knowledgeable because she had read The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore. I also expected Ariana Dumbledore to look younger, but no matter. I’m itching to move onto the most important part of this scene: SIR NEVILLE EFFING LONGBOTTOM. This inspired loud cheers from the crowd, as I expected. It was after the four of them came through the tunnel and into the room of requirement (which actually looked like the Trophy Room minus the trophies, which makes no sense because of the high security in the castle, but oh well; filmmakers probably thought some wouldn’t understand that the room of requirement could serve different purposes, such as it did when it had a dueling area for the D.A. and a supply closet for Filch and the Inquisitorial Squad when they tried to enter it) that made me happy in a bittersweet manner, as Hedwig’s Theme played triumphantly while Harry’s supporters clapped and hollered over his return.

OH OH OH. If this isn’t in chronological order, IDGAF, it deserves a mention somewhere. I cannot forget Voldemort at Malfoy Manor, with Nagini slithering over the corpses on the floor and my Malfoys looking terrified and appalled. The sword of Gryffindor apparating out of Griphook’s hand (which, by the by, he never died in the book as far as I remember?) to Neville was BRILLIANT. :’)

I couldn’t help but admire Luna a bit more than usual, beginning with her revelation of the diadem (and Ron’s hilarious “oh, here we go,” before she speaks). Snape’s fascist-like regime at his school, with the students marching around like the prisoners of an internment camp, was appropriately disconcerting. As for the scene in the great hall, with Snape addressing the students and Harry coming out of the woodwork… I’m currently split on whether or not I like it. It was most definitely a good scene but my roots in the book hold me back from giving it a complete thumbs up. The McGonagall/Snape fight was awesome, for lack of a better word, and Snape’s flight through the window was just the same. And we can’t forget Filch running through the doors, Mrs. Norris in his arms as he yells about students out of bed. NEVER CHANGE, FILCH.

It was when everyone started to arm the castle, esp. my Minerva being a BAMF, that I was squealing with excitement. Her reference to Seamus, when he was a klutzy pyro kid, was fantastic. The entrance courtyard looked a bit different than usual but I guess it’s a minor detail compared to all else. I must admit, I was SO DISAPPOINTED that they didn’t enter the Ravenclaw Common Room. I WANTED TO SEE MY DARN COMMON ROOM, YATES. However, as Luna asserted herself on the spiral staircase and made Harry stop in his tracks, that was the Luna I first fell in love with. In contrast to the Luna of the films, the Luna of the books retains her optimism, intellect, and weirdness while also becoming a bit feisty at times. Luna becoming feisty, finally, overjoyed me. Coming to the Grey Lady, THE SCENE WAS UTTERLY PERFECT. No problems at all with this performance.

The same goes for the chamber of secrets scene. Which leads me to THE KISS. ASKDJASDKJASKDJSKJD. FINALLY. I almost wish it had been just like the scene from the book, with Harry as a witness, but this was a good replacement. Especially their childish giggles at the end, LOL. Coming to the room of requirement: SAME FEELINGS. The encounter with the diadem was perfectly interrupted by the snarky little Slytherins. Harry, not caring whether or not he was cursed as he taunted Draco, was brilliant. I gave a little cheer when Hermione came to his rescue, Goyle attempted to kill her, and Ron ran after him. RUPERT WAS THE BEST IN THIS SCENE. ALL THE AWARDS. From his screaming as he’s chased by fiendfyre to being on his broom as they go to rescue Draco and Blaise (“If we die trying to save them, I’ll KILL you, Harry!”), I was immensely pleased. It was after this, when Harry had a vision, when the trio ran through the battle, and when they arrived at the boathouse that the smile left my face. Lavender didn’t die in the book, Kloves. .____. I understand the value of cinematic enhancement but… not necessary, man, not necessary. I teared up a wee bit.

Now, for Snape. SNAAAAAAPE. ALL OF THE MOTHER TRUCKING AWARDS AND TEARS.

ALL OF THEM.

This scene and the pensieve montage deserves its own post. Or blog, actually. But I digress with my fangirling over this. I felt so horrid for my main man; seeing what happened to him through the glass of the boathouse rather than directly in front of me on the screen was even more painful. Snape’s death was just… the best, not in the usual sense of the word, but… THE BEST. My heart ached from this point on: knowing that the trio were going to find dead Fred in the Great Hall (I WANTED TO KINDA SEE FRED’S LAST FIGHT PLUS THE PERCY REUNION, KLOVES AND YATES ಠ_ಠ), Padma and Trelawney covering up dead Lavender in the Great Hall, etc. It was when Harry left to go use the pensieve and baby Snape, Lily, and Tuney appeared that I… I don’t know what the heck ran through my mind. Their younger selves in the scenes were perfect, although I wouldn’t have minded a scene when they were teens at the school. Snape, begging for Dumbledore to help and later Snape, after finding out about Lily’s death and visiting the Potter household… my lower lip trembled like crazy. This scene got the most amount of tears from me and I could hear a bunch of sniffling in the crowd (although I didn’t cry much at all, but still). The patronus, Dumbledore telling Snape to murder him, all of it. My heart can’t go on. I LITERALLY CANNOT MOVE PAST THIS POINT.

Once Harry left the memories and realized his fate, SHIZ GOT REAL. There was a momentary lapse in my depression when Harry said that he had known that he was a horcrux all along, and that Hermione had supposed the same thing. Once again, the chosen one was a little too quick on the uptake for my liking. ಠ_ಠ But for Merlin’s sake, “I’ll go with you.” I’LL GO WITH YOU. HERMIONE, I LOVE YOU SO MUH-HUH-HUCH.

I only wish Ronald would have given Harry some sort of goodbye.

As for the forest… words escape me. As beautiful and as terrifying as I had hoped it to be, with Remus, Sirius, Lily, and James, and Harry’s self-sacrifice. I was in awe and was teary all at once. The whiteness after Harry’s death that encompassed the screen felt like forever until Harry showed up at King’s Cross. Might I add that Dumbledore strongly reminded me of Gandalf the White, formerly known as Gandalf the Grey? The small, fetus-like Voldemort was appropriately creepy. I loved this scene as much as any other, but I ADORED Dumbledore’s latest words of wisdom: “Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who deserve it.” So not canon but so freaking amazing. BRAVO.

Fast forward to after the Kings Cross Station scene and BAM, here we have Voldemort being the most awkward he has been in his entire life (AWK. HUG AND CACKLE TIME). He’s so giddy about winning the battle that it’s like the awkward teenage stage that never hit Tom Riddle has come in full force. Seriously, though. Every time he spoke, the audience couldn’t help but laugh. Case in point: (.gif of Voldy hugging Draco)

This brings to mind NEVILLE’S MOTHER EFFIN’ MOMENT OF TRUTH, when he stands up to the winners of the battle when it’s so apparent to everyone but Harry that all is lost. I was about to lose it during his speech. But then, in the words of McGonagall, BOOM! went everything, mutha truckin’ HP is back in biznazz, and Voldemort grows out of his temporary awkwardness. It was so damn intense, from Harry and Voldemort running around (especially when their faces seemed to morph together when they apparated around the castle together), to Ron and Hermione and Neville and Nagini… GAH. I still have some qualms with the whole jumping off of a ledge with your arms around each other NYAAAAAAAAAAAAH part, but overall it was BEAUTIFUL AND TERRIFYING.

I dunno if this is in order or not, but MY MALFOYS. ♥_______♥ Cissy being her bad self and Lucius being his slippery self and Draco joining his family. At first, I was APPALLED that Yates made them run away. THEY WERE IN THE GREAT HALL AFTER IT WAS ALL SAID AND DONE IN THE BOOK. But I now realize that someone, maybe even Bellatrix herself, would have murdered Narcissa for lying to the Dark Lord about Harry’s death. Who really knows, though?

Switching over to the Great Hall fight, the loudest cheers (and I mean, THE loudest) were for “Not my daughter, you *****!”. Was it masochistic that I, a huge Bellatrix fangirl that dressed as her for the evening, cheered as Molly killed her? The thing I have a slight problem with is the disintegration business. WTF. I understand that if Bellatrix had left a body behind and not been blown to bits, some Lord of the Flies stuff would have possibly gone down with her corpse, but… I dunno, it just didn’t suit me.

Finally, Neville killing Nagini.

MY MAN PLUS SWORD EQUALS EXCELLENCE. GUH. But I digress from the most important part: the final bit between Voldemort and Harry. Voldemort’s death was not as I expected. His CGI disintegration was more appropriate, disturbing, and visually better than Bellatrix’s death, but I couldn’t help but wish that they had kept it the same as it was written in the book. Maybe I was falling asleep and nearly dying from holding back from going to the bathroom, but as Voldemort was disarmed with Harry’s signature spell (expelliarmus, yo!) and the wand, cracked, flew out of his hands, he just… died. Just died. The version in the book was better, in my opinion, but whatever. I’m just gonna have to live with this.

Finally, after the momentous moment, the reconciliation and celebration between everyone was so sweet and endearing, my heart couldn’t handle the happiness. Filch, ever the caretaker, with his effing broom was the icing on the cake. Neville/Luna was never really explored in the last films but their moment of silence together at the end of it all was adorable. Harry’s simple smile at Ron and Hermione holding hands was subtle and sweet, and their walk together on the bridge where Harry breaks and tosses the elder wand is even better. I was about to cry until “19 years later” flashed onto the screen, and more cheers erupted.

The characters looked perfectly aged, and Hermione… can I say, HOT DAMN, GURL, you age well! The theater erupted into muffled laughter when Draco, Scorpius, and Daphne appeared on screen. Honestly, I didn’t get much of a look at the other two because I was admiring Draco’s regality and facial hair. Ron’s belly was perfect and funny and AH, all of them were so adorable with their children that I wanted to cry and I’m tearing up as I type this. I definitely enjoyed the epilogue more than I thought I would.

Guys, I just… I’m just so happy that they ended the movie just how they ended the first film, with that magical music playing and the kids waving out of the train windows before they go off to Hogwarts. Ugh, tears again. Most of the audience stayed through the credits (I left halfway through and hopped on the bandwagon of people taking photos before they exited) and my walk home was silent and contemplative. No feelings.

So, guys, thanks for sticking with me through this monster of a review, if you can even call it that. If you have something to say, feel free to pop into my VMs... or reply in this thread, of course. I can’t really put into a coherent statement how this book, these films, this phenomenon, and this fandom have changed me for the better over these past 10 years that I've been involved. If not for HP, I doubt I would have taken much of an interest in writing or literature. Dumbledore’s quote ("Words, in my not-so-humble opinion, are our most inexhaustible source of magic, capable of both inflicting injury and remedying it.") really sums up how I’ve been influenced, in some way or another, and how I possibly want to pursue journalism. For now, I can say that HP changed me for the better and taught me not to fear death, enjoy life, and to value friendship. But who knows? Maybe in a decade I might be crediting it with inspiring me to pursue my career and to succeed in it.