| Ashwinder
Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: #47a59c
Posts: 13,767
Hogwarts RPG Name:
Asena Kaplan
Hufflepuff Fourth Year  x10  x1
|  AR Lesson I activity post 6 doesn't proofread tweets | #wrongaboutcereal | #siriusly? | emo to the extremo
SPOILER!!: BUT I ACTUALLY AM Quote:
Originally Posted by feeheeheeny  Everything he was saying was sensible and encouraging and very nice, Sophie acknowledged that, but it didn't stop her from bringing her knees up to her chest, curling up in a tight, little ball, and burying her face in her knees. She didn't want him to see her like this, so she let the tears flow in concealment as he spoke. The only thing that did make her start to feel better was the bit about Head Girl and Head Boy being a team, and... the reminder that she had him and she didn't have to go through this alone brought her closest to alleviating her heavy heart, but...
She wasn't sure he knew what she was going through. Sure, he was under the same pressure as Head Boy to be a good role model and set a good example, but...
Sigh. People still expected him to be goofy and a little silly and not get things right because that's how (wrongly) people perceived him. She didn't think people would be as shocked if he did or said something wrong than if she did. But she wasn't going to say that aloud. No, he had his anxieties and stressors, too. No reason to make him feel like his feelings weren't valid, because they were absolutely valid and real and made a lot of sense.
And he was saying she didn't have to be perfect, but she wiped her eyes and lifted her head to look at him blearily, "But you think I'm this wonderful, fantastic, perfect person. I know you do. S'why you've been... s'why you've liked me for so long, 'cause y'think I'm somethin' special and so good. But I'm not. M'just... I just try to hide the bad things. I don't wanna let you down."
She sniffled and wiped at her eyes again, trying to blink back any further tears when Zander did oblige and went ahead to share what he was afraid of. His fear made sense, and it wasn't actually something she didn't already know. She knew he was afraid of graduation and had no idea what he was going to do with his life. She unballed herself and scooted over to him, snugly curling up against him and hugging his arm encouragingly, still blinking back the tears that threatened to overflow. "I don't wanna leave Hogwarts either." Truthfully. "I like being here. I like school. I like learning 'n the professors 'n the people, even despite all the stress 'n tears 'n stuff. I still love it. And... I love being here with you. I like spending basically all day every day with you."
There was a pause, a sniffle, and then, "I don't wanna go live at home after this. I wanna live with you."
Man.
This was the worst.
It was the absolute worst and Zander was absolutely and positively stuck. Uh. Clearly his words didn't do anything but make the situation worse. And now he was sure that she was crying. And now he felt like an idiot. He should've just stopped himself at the beginning before things got this bad. In trying to play the hero, he essentially screwed the entire thing up even more. And he didn't know what the heck to do.
He was starting to think that maybe he'd be a lot better off staying entirely quiet from this point forward. Except what she said next, well, he couldn't stay quiet about that. "You're right, I did think you were perfect and I liked you a lot for it," he paused. "But now that I know you're not, I think I like you even more." He gave her a genuine, goofy Zander Adair grin, in hopes that he wasn't digging his own grave even further here. "And 'sides, doesn't matter if you're actually mistake free, 'cause well... You'll always be brilliant in my eyes no matter what." He looked down at the floor.
He didn't really feel like completing the rest of the activity, truth be told. He was still in mild shock with all that stuff Sophie was holding in. He knew she was stressed... But not like that much. She hadn't really mentioned any of that before... It's why what he revealed was less... revealing. He didn't have to think much to uncover a fear like that. It was something anyone could see clearly after just talking to him.
But Zander's reasons for wanting to stay were different. Things were easy at Hogwarts, 'cause he didn't have to make decisions. He knew he had to wake up for class, do his homework, and work hard. He didn't have to choose. He didn't have to know. Other than the whole Head Boy thing, responsibilities were at a minimum. He actually didn't like the learning and the classes and the school aspects. But he didn't want to face the world. But he didn't voice any of that though because his mind was busy going other places now.
"What?" Sophie Brown say WHAT NOW? Ahem. "I mean, you DO?" Even after he had made her cry like that? And after he tore up their assignment? And er, their time was almost running out.
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