Quote:
Originally Posted by
Saiai 
"I..." Amelia trailed off, not quite sure how to deal with Isaac when he was angry at her. She was meant to be angry at him, not the other way around. Her heart was the one that was breaking, even as she tried desperately to tell herself that everything would be okay.
Maybe she shouldn't have said they'd never be okay. Maybe that sounded too final, but it wasn't. If he tried... If he tried she would too. Because he was the only person she'd thought about for years and she knew, if she was being honest with herself, that he did love her. That her accusing him of not doing so was her lashing out but she was scared and hurt and she didn't know how else to react.
She collapsed to the ground when he asked if she wanted to know how much he loved her, sensing that maybe, just maybe, she'd finally pushed too far. Questioned something he wouldn't forgive her for doubting.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, flinching as he raised his voice at her. "I know, I know Isaac, I love you too," she tried to assure him, stopping when he simply continued on, her heart breaking even more when he told her that he'd bought a ring. A ring. He really had meant to commit to them, and she'd wanted his ring. Wanted to wear it proudly for a long time, since she'd been able to admit that this, what they had, wasn't just a crush, but actual love. Which is why it hurt so bad. Because she did love him, she may not trust him, even though it was a mistake, Ed had confirmed it and he had no reason to lie to her even though Isaac was his best friend, it might be made again. But the very fact that she'd wanted him to hold her was enough to tell her that she could trust him again, that she could forgive him..
He had seen her collapse to the ground and his heart just dropped, he'd just felt crushed, knowing she thought he didn't love her. Because of one stupid mistake, one that he'd not even been the cause of! Hearing her whisper I'm sorry and say that she knew and loved him too, had cut through him even more when it finally sunk in.
But by the time it had sunk in? He was halfway down the pathways. He'd not cried not once during any of the terms, but now was the closest he'd felt in years. Leaning with his back against a tree off the path he just hit his head into the tree, knowing he'd probably just killed off any chance he'd had of even fixing this with Amelia. A tear finally fell as he swiped it away fast with the back of his hand. Damn...he just couldn't even think right then. He was furious with himself. Ed had been right, don't tell Amelia.
He watched for Amelia hoping to see her coming behind him, but knowing it was futile to be hoping for that. His head dropped staring at the snow at his feet, his heart just broken, knowing that he had been the one to do this, and that she was mad enough to say that she didn't think they'd ever be okay. He just couldn't do this. It was more then enough to send him to Australia and not come back to England ever again.
And that was saying something because he didn't want to live in Australia. He wanted to find a place for Amelia and him to live in, find a job and stay in this horribly cold country just to be with her. Closing his eyes he brushed another tear firmly away with the back of his hand.