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Old 05-02-2011, 06:08 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Life Goes On Long After The Thrill Of Living Is Gone - Sa13+
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This is a One Shot taking place in the Headmaster’s Office just before Harry Potter (the only character in this ff) goes into the Forbidden Forrest to meet Voldemort.

My name is Connie, and this is my second writing experience here on SnitchSeeker.

Disclaimer: All things Harry Potter, and all things related to Harry Potter are the property of JK Rowling. I don’t take any credit of writing Harry Potter, only my own imagination of how things might have been in this particular scene, instead of the way she wrote it.
Title, Life Goes On Long After The Living Is Gone, was taken from the song, Jack and Diane, written and performed by John Mellencamp (also known as John Cougar Mellencamp) I hope you enjoy this One Shot.

Special thanks to Katie for setting my grammar correct.


Life Goes On Long After The Thrill Of Living Is Gone




After he watched Snape’s memories Harry raised his head from the Pensieve. As his short life flashed before him, the strength in every ounce of muscle in his body seemed to ebb away from him, and he sank slowly to the floor. His heart was pounding so hard he could feel each beat explode in all the pressure points of his body. The silence was deafening. Not a single portrait of past Headmasters of Hogwarts uttered a word or made any sound. He could have heard a pin drop, was it not for his heart pounding so hard. He could hear each beat scream out the injustice of living so short a time to give up living and seize death without a fight.

It wasn’t any of the times he was being bullied by Dudley, or his rough friends Harry started remembering. It wasn’t any of the times he was punished unfairly and sent to his cupboard and later his room, by the Dursley’s without his dinner he thought of. Nor did he think of any of the injustices done to him by Aunt Marge and her dog whenever they were there for a visit. And he didn’t think of the everyday abuse he endured at the hands of the Dursley’s. Harry wasn’t thinking of what he could remember while he was with the Dursley’s because he only existed there, it wasn’t what he called life at all.

Life for Harry began sometime late in his tenth year of his existence. One day he received a large envelope in the mail. Although he didn’t get to read it, there was a stirring within him. The very thought that someone knew him and had sent him mail was an indescribable feeling of life. It was this moment of experience, that he knew he had to have had a life at one time. He just couldn’t remember it because it was buried from so long ago. He remembered wondering who would know him well enough to know his space was a cupboard under the stairs. Well of course Dudley’s crude friends knew, but they wouldn’t be sending him any mail. And he was sure that since it was written in delicate handwriting it couldn‘t be any of them. That first letter and all of the ones that followed, was destroyed by his Uncle. All of them except that is for the one that was hand delivered, (while on the run from whomever was sending these letters) by a very large man just after midnight when Harry turned eleven. This was the time he considered to be the beginning of his life. From that moment through the nearly seven years that followed was a trill to live.


The pain in Harry’s heart intensified as he lay there not stirring or even breathing. Tears streamed out of the wells of his eyes onto the carpet as he lay prone on the cold dusty floor. The pain was great, yet he had not the strength to move. He wondered if maybe his heart might break right then and save himself the pain he would endure with whatever he would face at the hands of Voldemort.

“No” he thought.

He drew in a shallow shaky breath. Then he started gulping in lungs full of air. Still shaky, but he was at least breathing now.

“This isn’t about me.” He thought, still not moving.

As unfair as it was, he knew it was bigger than himself. There is an evil wizard who has gone beyond human kind who thinks he is above all others. He thinks he alone has the right to live and rule the world he lives in. All others are to serve him. Harry knew Voldemort had to be stopped. He just couldn’t understand why he had to die to do it. It seems to him that if he is to stop him, then his own death defeats that purpose. Harry wondered how could he possibly kill Voldemort if he is dead. Maybe he is able to kill the evil wizard, but dies in the process. But then he remembered the prophecy that one cannot live while the other lives.

“What does that mean then?” he thought.

He shook those inhibiting thoughts from his mind. He thought of every year since he started Hogwarts, he was nearly killed one way or another. Now Harry wondered if somehow he was s’pose to have killed Voldemort one of those times, and failed to because he didn’t die trying. He tried to think how he could have killed Voldemort that first year as he was face to face with him, (albeit, while Voldemort was on the back of Quirrell’s head.)

“I was just learning to be a wizard then. How could I have possibly known how to kill him?”

Things wasn’t making sense to him. He remembered grabbing Quirrell’s hand and it turning it to ash. Then he remembered gripping Quirrell’s face. The pain was so intense for Harry he had passed out. Dumbledore had said that Quirrell died, turned to ash.

“Why didn’t that kill Voldemort? He was attached to Quirrell because he didn’t have a body of his own. Why didn’t he die then? Was it because I lived through it? All the people who have died since that time would still be alive if I would have died then!”

He started feeling guilty and angry because he didn’t die when he was suppose to. He thought of how people would be living if he had done things the right way and died. Dumbledore would be alive. There wouldn’t have been a war, and all those people would still be alive. But, he wouldn’t have fallen in love with Ginny either.

He shook those thoughts from his mind, except the thoughts of Ginny. His heart stopped pounding so hard, and his breathing became normal.

“Ginny” he hopelessly cried in his mind.

He thought of her as a little girl growing up before his eyes and into the young woman she was becoming. He thought of the future. He would ask her to marry him. They would have children. Their life together would be great beyond anything imaginable. Why is it that he wouldn’t be allowed to have this life and have the love he missed out on, all his life. Who was he that he didn’t deserve to have a life, and have love? Dumbledore said he had love and it was his greatest power. Yet he knew not what that meant for sure. He definitely didn’t want to hug Voldemort to death.

Harry with great effort got up to a position where he was on one knee and sitting on the heel of his other foot. He reached in his shirt and pulled out his tattered and much worn Marauders’ Map. He opened it, as he had done countless times while searching for the Horcrux’s, to locate Ginny.

“Hang on,” he thought suddenly. “I didn’t die because he had the Horcrux’s. Yes, of course! Why didn’t I remember that?”

So many things were going through his mind he couldn’t think straight. Harry brought his gaze back to the map again. He put it to his face with his eyes closed, and smelled Ginny as fresh as if she was standing there with him. The smell comforted him. He remembered the birthday gift she had given him, and longed for her lips on his again. He wanted to hold her against him and hang on tight as though she could sustain his life.

“I’ll never hold her or kiss her again. We’ll never be married, or have children.” He thought as fresh tears flooded from his eyes.

He was starting to loose his nerve, wanting to let someone else kill Voldemort. and he could take Ginny to have the life he wanted. He justified his thoughts of rebellion with; What could it hurt for once in his life to have what he wanted. What he needed. Then he thought of the consequences of those actions. All of the Weasley’s would be hunted down and killed, as they were traitors and outlaws. Everyone who fought against Voldemort would be killed. With all that going on, how could he possibly think they could ever be happy. He knew they wouldn’t be. And besides that, he knew that Voldemort eventually would find them and kill them both.

And then he thought of the rest of the memory. He thought of Dumbledore’s plan although he didn’t fully understand it still. The plan was made without Harry’s knowledge or consent. He was to carry it out now even though he had failed to kill Nagini. Hermione and Ron knew what needed to be done to kill it. They would have to see to it that it was killed.

He thought of Professor Snape and the sacrifice he made since that awful night of betrayal. He thought how brave Professor Snape had been so that he, Harry, could fulfill the prophecy. He wanted Harry to live all those years, even protected him from death several times, though he hated him for being James Potter‘s son, and not his.

Harry folded the map and laid it on the desk. He would not be needing it anymore. Ginny would live and find love with somebody else and be happy. It would take time for her to heal from loosing Harry. He wasn’t being arrogant, he just knew of the deep love they had for each other, and you can’t just loose that and go on without healing. She would heal though, marry, and have children. They would be happy, and safe. He wanted this for her. This gave him the strength and determination to get up and walk out the door, and go into the Forrest to meet his death. The only thing he could think of that might kill Voldemort was this love Dumbledore kept saying was so powerful in him, would somehow rebound the killing curse back to Voldemort when he used it on him. But, he wouldn’t have the protection of his mothers’ love this time. He would die. It was the plan after all. He put on his invisibility cloak, and left the room.


Last edited by demented_death_eater; 08-02-2011 at 02:09 AM.
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Old 05-03-2011, 05:40 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I really loved this, so brilliant. Harry was so in character!
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Old 05-03-2011, 08:24 AM   #3 (permalink)
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This was so good - Harry was really well writen. Well done.
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Old 05-03-2011, 07:36 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Connie View Post

He wanted Harry to live all those years, even protected him from death several times, though he hated him for being James Potter‘s son, and not his.
I adored that part! ^
This is excellent Connie, your writing is superb and Harry was really in character. His thoughts were so logical and this was really touching! Good job
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Old 05-03-2011, 09:41 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Mordanyes: Thank you very much, I'm glad you loved my little one shot. Saying it is brilliant was very sweet of you. And I love Harry, as he is my favorite character, I wanted to keep him in his own character, not anything better or worse than he is. Thank you again.

LilyLunaGinnyPotter: Thank you for reading, and giving me the wonderful compliment. I love to write, although I didn't realize this until last year when I wrote my first ff. Go figure. I'm very glad you liked it. Thank you again.

ThePureBloodPrincess: Hey Jazz! Thank you for reading my ff. I appreciate your compliments and am very glad you liked my ff. You're sweet compliments are going to puff my head. Thank you.
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Old 05-04-2011, 04:09 AM   #6 (permalink)
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wonderfully written Connie...really liked it very much...
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Old 05-04-2011, 04:20 AM   #7 (permalink)
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OMG Connie this is A.MA.ZING!!! Harry's feelings are so real, that personally as a reader, I was able to feel his pain, understand his confusion and agony, and comprehend his sorrow. The way you describe it shows how much you see into the character and how deep you have thought over it all before putting it into words. That's why I enjoyed reading it from the beginning to the end of your post without getting bored. It kept me interested throughout and amazingly, in this one short pice of writing, I felt so many emotions that many pages of writing couldn't create these feelings that I felt for me. Mainly because we all feel so closely bonded to the protagonist and also the memories that it brought back of the last book which was also my favourite of the series.

This was especially beautifully written:
Quote:
So many things were going through his mind he couldn’t think straight. Harry brought his gaze back to the map again. He put it to his face with his eyes closed, and smelled Ginny as fresh as if she was standing there with him. The smell comforted him. He remembered the birthday gift she had given him, and longed for her lips on his again. He wanted to hold her against him and hang on tight as though she could sustain his life.
I also really felt pitty for him when you wrote this:
Quote:
He started feeling guilty and angry because he didn’t die when he was suppose to. He thought of how people would be living if he had done things the right way and died. Dumbledore would be alive. There wouldn’t have been a war, and all those people would still be alive. But, he wouldn’t have fallen in love with Ginny either.
It's so sad that he actually feels guilty for not dying earlier!

Overall, this peice of writing is truelly amazing. Thank you Connie.

Last edited by crookshanks_kitty; 05-19-2011 at 07:41 PM.
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Old 05-04-2011, 07:24 AM   #8 (permalink)
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A decidedly very dark moment in Harry's story, myself I'm partial to the earlier books because it was more whimsical and fun and downright crazy. I love crazy whimsy ... but whatever. I'm also a fan of things like Fables were you turn the sweet, saccharine fairy tales you grew up with and twist them into dark adult world narratives. So ... I guess I like to have my cake and eat it too ... but usually with Harry Potter like Oz I'm more a fan of the softer whimsical side ...

All that said, this was a truly brilliant piece of story Connie and its nice to see your story short and concise. Your character changed over the course of the narrative, which is really all that's required of a short tale (or any tale). There has to be some kind of fundamental change ... and you did that magnificently with Harry giving him a reason to find the courage to go out and fight.

In keeping with the whole messianic theme of the books this is like Jesus in the garden before his crucifixion. I think you wrote it brilliantly and your (intentional or not) Biblical reference is brilliant.

You really are a very talented storyteller. You should try your hand at more short pieces ... I find it helps me learn to craft longer works. Because it isn't the quantity of words (too many fantasy authors make that mistake) but rather the quality of events in the tales.

And this tale is all quality. Nice job Conners.
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Old 05-08-2011, 10:51 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Ohmyword Connie! It was so breathtaking and awesome! I cried, it was so moving, and true, and it was so, Harry, it was very Harry. I loooooove it, I really truly did. Awesome, awesome, awesome job!
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Old 05-08-2011, 11:53 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Aww this is amazing!I wanted to cryyy!
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Old 05-09-2011, 12:46 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Harita: Thanks so much for your sweet comment. It makes me very happy that you liked it so much. I’d love to see you put up a new ff. You are a talented writer, and I enjoy your work.

Crookshanks kitty: Thank you Ava, for those wonderful comments. I am sorry for the long delay in responding to these comments. Of you and Ottery’s, I needed to be especially careful so as not to seem like I was making little of J.K. Rowling’s writing, because I think she is one of the most brilliant writers that I’ve ever read. Also I wanted to be very careful I don’t break any rules about the subtle Biblical reference I made.
Quote:
Harry's feelings are so real, that personally as a reader, I was able to feel his pain, understand his confusion and agony, and comprehend his sorrow. The way you describe it shows how much you see into the character and how deep you have thought over it all before putting it into words.
I was slightly disappointed in the content of JK’s, thirty-forth chapter in, “The Deathly Hallows” ‘The Forrest Again’. Only that it seemed to me she was in too much of a hurry to add what I think Harry would have thought about immediately after viewing Snape’s memory. After all, most of the whole last book was Harry’s struggle’s with his hurt, disappointment, bitterness, … in how Dumbledore had deceived him, and didn’t really love him…. I think his first thoughts would have been just what I wrote. I think he was stunned and confused. And why wouldn’t he think of his getting a life, living it, and then thinking of what he will miss in the future? I don’t think he would have rehashed the whole year of what he felt Dumbledore thought of him, and being bitter that he didn’t die all the times he escaped death, or die like his parents or Hedwig died.

OtterySt.Catchpole: Hey ~Otty, thanks so much for reading and commenting.
Quote:
...this was a truly brilliant piece of story Connie and its nice to see your story short and concise.
Short and concise is what I was going for.
Quote:
Your character changed over the course of the narrative, which is really all that's required of a short tale (or any tale). There has to be some kind of fundamental change ... and you did that magnificently with Harry giving him a reason to find the courage to go out and fight.
I learned from your One Shot that you wrote while doing Human Nature. I LOVED it soooooo much. It really is what I used to help me be short, but informative, and hopefully entertaining. Just like yours.
Quote:
In keeping with the whole messianic theme of the books this is like Jesus in the garden before his crucifixion. I think you wrote it brilliantly and your (intentional or not) Biblical reference is brilliant.
I don’t think it’s good to compare Harry, his life and sacrifice he made, to Jesus Christ. In staying with JK Rowling and the way she obviously wrote the series the way she did though, I wanted to be careful not to stray away from the message so many people got from it. However, I did want to stay with the theme of the sacrifice made on both counts (Harry and Jesus) for the sake of the story. I didn’t want to be obvious about it because I don’t want anyone thinking I’m pressing my religious beliefs on anyone. Therefore, I hope I was subtle, and really, (if you think about it) the title says what I wanted to get across best.
Thank you so much ~Otty. Maybe I will do more writing sometime in the future. We’ll see. And maybe it will be another One Shot, so I can craft my writing. After all, my first story was rather long winded. I loved it anyway though.


Cassiopia Malfoy: I nearly posted with out even seeing you and Lilly James. I was busy preparing my responses to the last three people that commented. Sorry about that.
Quote:
Ohmyword Connie! It was so breathtaking and awesome! I cried, it was so moving, and true, and it was so, Harry, it was very Harry. I loooooove it, I really truly did. Awesome, awesome, awesome job!
I'm at a loss for words. I humbly thank you for your compliments. It moves me that you was moved so much. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thank you very much.

LillyJames: As I just said, I nearly overlooked you, and I apologize for it.
I thank you for thinking it is amazing and I do thank you for reading and commenting. It thrills me that you liked it so much.
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Old 05-09-2011, 02:49 AM   #12 (permalink)
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HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!! I love this short story. I didn't realize you were writing again. I'm glad you did. This was very insightful and I agree with you on the book feeling rushed and omitting these powerful emotions. Thank you for filling in the gap.
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Old 05-10-2011, 09:59 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Hey Connie! I love this wee one shot.
You portray Harry so well. The descriptions of his thought and feelings are wonderful.
He is just so lovely and brave lol
I'm so glad you have decided to write this. I loved your last story as you know and I said I would love to read more that you wrote.
Great One shot Connie. You have let me read something enjoyable and something I love (for the past two weeks it has been extraemly dire English Passages!)
Well Done, its awesome!
You number one fan,
Soph x
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Old 05-16-2011, 05:58 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Connie, long-winded? LOL Now that ... I would never use to describe your tales LOL Keep writing love ... you can only get better with practice, and one shots are love. ♥

And subtle Biblical references are not pushing your religious beliefs, ergo I think they're cool on SS. Messianic narratives are pre-Christian in nature, I mean Nausicaa one of my favorite animes from Hayao Miyazaki a brilliant man in his own right is messianic without the Christian theme. I don't really like them so ... that I liked yours is a testament to how well you wrote it ...

If I had to suggest something could you write post-apocalyptic tales or zombie stories next? I really hate those kinds of stories and I'm just curious if you could make me like them ... Keep writing Con! I'll keep reading.
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Old 05-19-2011, 07:36 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Quote:
Thank you Ava, for those wonderful comments. I am sorry for the long delay in responding to these comments. Of you and Ottery’s, I needed to be especially careful so as not to seem like I was making little of J.K. Rowling’s writing, because I think she is one of the most brilliant writers that I’ve ever read.
It was my pleasure Connie. I cosidered myself honoured to have the chance of reading your brilliant writing.

Quote:
I was slightly disappointed in the content of JK’s, thirty-forth chapter in, “The Deathly Hallows” ‘The Forrest Again’. Only that it seemed to me she was in too much of a hurry to add what I think Harry would have thought about immediately after viewing Snape’s memory. After all, most of the whole last book was Harry’s struggle’s with his hurt, disappointment, bitterness, … in how Dumbledore had deceived him, and didn’t really love him….
Actually, to be honest, I was slightly dissapointed in that too. I was expecting her to describe Harry's feelings and his overview on life more in detail as it reached the climax of the whole series and after all that he went through. It wasn't only about concluding the last book, but more about summing up the overal story of Harry potter, the story of his life, his transition from a child to a man, and his overall perspective on how the occurences of his life lead him to where he was standing then, facing his enemy. Sure, she did mention that it was love that was on his side, but it took him so long to figure that out by himself and I think she needed to make that more realistic and comprehensible by the readers to relate to him and get them to think, you know what, I'd definitely feel what he's feeling now if I was in his situation. She needed to make that confusion that naturally Harry as a human being would be feeling at that point more believable. That sudden determination cannot be attained easily and she makes him sound too heroic and selfless. But again, that's what I think and others might have a different opinion on that.

Quote:
I think his first thoughts would have been just what I wrote. I think he was stunned and confused. And why wouldn’t he think of his getting a life, living it, and then thinking of what he will miss in the future? I don’t think he would have rehashed the whole year of what he felt Dumbledore thought of him, and being bitter that he didn’t die all the times he escaped death, or die like his parents or Hedwig died.
Completely agree!
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Old 05-24-2011, 11:17 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Connie View Post
After he watched Snape’s memories Harry raised his head from the Pensieve. As his short life flashed before him, the strength in every ounce of muscle in his body seemed to ebb away from him, and he sank slowly to the floor. His heart was pounding so hard he could feel each beat explode in all the pressure points of his body. The silence was deafening. Not a single portrait of past Headmasters of Hogwarts uttered a word or made any sound. He could have heard a pin drop, was it not for his heart pounding so hard. He could hear each beat scream out the injustice of living so short a time to give up living and seize death without a fight.
I love, love, love all of the descriptions. Absolutely perfect.

I loved the fic, Connie! Sorry I couldn't get here sooner; I've been a bit preoccupied with other things, but I did finally make it! It was written beautifully and very much in character for Harry. Fantastic job, and I can't wait to see your next 'project'.

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Old 05-29-2011, 04:40 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Werecats are people too! Reader of Fan Fictions

Molly W.: Hey Stephie, thanks for the Mother's Day wish for happiness. Being your mom is one of the things in my life that makes me happy. You saying my ff was insightful is icing on the cake.
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Thank you for filling in the gap.
That's what us mom's strive to do.

Morag: Hey Sophie, thanks for staying up to read and comment on my ff. I know it's late for you. I'm happy I brightened your reading experience for those last two weeks you spoke of. I love to read and was soooooo disappointed in English Literature when I had to take it in High School (all those years ago). If only we could have chosen for ourselves the time periods and authors we wanted to, I would have loved the class. I'm glad you liked my ff, and I'm happy you're willing to read what I write. Thanks for all your sweetness, Sophie.

OtterySt.Catchpole: Hey ~Otty! Thanks for setting my mind at ease. (Biblical reference) And thanks again for the kind things you said about my writing, and my ff. Just to let you know as per your request;
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If I had to suggest something could you write post-apocalyptic tales or zombie stories next?
It will be coming to a SnitchSeeker site near you in the near future. Watch for it, a short story tentatively titled, "Led By His Wand". I felt the need to rework the ending due to the recent natural catastrophes occurring around the world recently, and most recent here in our USA. I don't want to seem insensitive to the loss, devastation, and destruction people are dealing with. My heart goes out to them all.
Anyway, watch for it, and I hope you enjoy it. Thanks ~Otty

Crookshanks kittk: Thanks Ava. I'm glad you understand my writing and the things I try to bring out. And it makes me happy that you agree with me.

Jen<33: Hey Emily. I'm happy to see you here.Thanks for your time as I know real life can be and often is very hectic. That's what's so wonderful about SS. It allows us these pleasures to escape the real world from time to time, as long as we prioritize and keep what is real life first. Thanks Emily for reading, commenting, and saying the wonderful things you said about my ff, and my writing.
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I love, love, love all of the descriptions. Absolutely perfect.
I loved the fic, Connie!
I'm happy you loved it so much.
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Old 06-29-2011, 06:56 PM   #18 (permalink)

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Although he didn’t get to read it, there was a stirring within him. The very thought that someone knew him and had sent him mail was an indescribable feeling of life.
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! This is such a great description!

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He definitely didn’t want to hug Voldemort to death.


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This gave him the strength and determination to get up and walk out the door, and go into the Forrest to meet his death
Haunting!


Ah, I love it Conners! It's very detailed and I think that Harry would definitely have gone through this process if he had had the time(although I understand why JKR just had him understand lol). GREAT work! Especially with the Ginny paragraphs *cries*. Ah, I feel like Harry died all over again
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Old 06-30-2011, 03:40 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Janet Lynn Gordon
Fifth Year
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Werecats are people too! Reader of Fan Fictions

Obi-Wan K'Lari: Hey K'Lari! Thank you for reading and commenting. I'm so happy you liked it. I did enjoy writing it. I'd love for you to read my next one coming up. 'Led By His Wand' It's all written, I'm just typing and editing now. I hope to have it up by next week. Submitted anyway. Thanks again K'Lari
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