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| Finished Fanworks Home to all the completed stories and poetry that our authors have written. |
08-27-2009, 06:40 PM
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#76 (permalink)
| Pogrebin
Join Date: May 2009 Location: London
Posts: 32,839
Hogwarts RPG Name: Alexander River Hirsch Gryffindor Third Year Hogwarts RPG Name: -- Ministry RPG Name:
Zhuó Xiá Li Ministry RPG Name:
Grayson Douglas Whitlock Accidents & Catastrophes x11 x11
| urine trouble | Pat's Strong Confident Other Half | Pees Like a Champion Unicorn Racehorse Haha! Teddy's last comment was funny! I don't know why, it just was. I'm glad he came to Ottery's rescue! *gasps* Those Death Eaters are really, really mean! That is totally not human! Killing someone like that! Well, they're Death Eaters. I love the way you described the place where Ottery is being kept! It sounds so real! Great post! Loved it! Can't wait for more!
Kita
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08-28-2009, 06:47 AM
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#77 (permalink)
| SS Featured AuthorTürk Bilgini Bugbear
Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: {in a leap of faith}
Posts: 31,791
Hogwarts RPG Name: Sarani Glass Graduated Ministry RPG Name:
Sion Logan Jetza x12
| ♥ Mrs. Itachi Uchiha™ & MAJNOO! : Bleach & Kyo & Natsume ♥ [ Maxh!Jesh ] Quote:
Originally Posted by Ottsy It was here the Chinese triads were holding Ottery, though not for much longer. Quote:
“In typical Ottery fashion you’ve proven to be completely and utterly useless,” Rodolphus exclaimed, slapping the boy hard across the face with his glove.
Is it wrong of me to find that funny? Quote:
Ottery hung down from the dungeon wall, his wrists in shackles, his head bent down staring at the dirt floor. “I don’t know, I think my friends might disagree seeing as I haven’t spilled all their secrets,” the boy replied quietly. It would be goodbye to this dirty cell soon.
Okay, forget funny. You just made my heart twist.
MY POOR OTTERY! Quote:
“I’m afraid not Ottery. No one is going to swoop in and save you. What’s more, it’s not likely anyone will remember you, or even notice you missing. Not with all the things we’ve got planned for your troupe of friends and the Dark Lord’s ascension.”
-mega gasp'eth- Quote:
“At least I’ll be in good company.”
Quote:
Evading Nazi's during the forties had been difficult. The Bolshevik revolution had presented problems, as had the Titanic and the Hindenburg, but this. This, could possibly kill him.
He shouldn't be too worried. =p Quote:
“If you were going to heaven you wouldn’t be falling, now would you?” Teddy’s familiar voice rang in his head.
AWESOME ENDING! Iloveyouuuuu!
-huggles you lyk mad- |
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08-28-2009, 07:22 AM
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#78 (permalink)
| SS Featured Artist DA Poet Rupert is My Man! SS100 Triumphant Aethonan
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Lovin m wolf & dingo
Posts: 18,891
Hogwarts RPG Name: Ottery St. Catchpole Third Year | I'm so lost right now ... *goes off to find inspiration* Paris & Kellybear r luv :Read Otty 's fics:Gone With the Wind:I♥Rupert Thank you all for the cool words ... I'm kind of lost right now, not about the direction of the story but how to get it there ...
I can't help feeling like I'm overburdening the story with too much superfluous action ...
Yes/No?
Do you all need another recap? Too many characters too little time?
Lemme know guys ... I'm at an important juncture ... and I could just start killing people off if this fic is too heavy with extras ... just sayin' *pushes Luna off a cliff*
I think I've got writer's block ... *dies* and that's because I don't believe in it. *sighs* How can you have something you don't believe in? I don't know ... maybe I should start another fic and ...
Ideas, suggestions, critiques, am I short on romance, is this boring? Where are my underpants? All welcome ... I'm suffering a crisis of confidence ... I should change the title to Crisis and retcon everything that's happened, shouldn't I?
Oh, and everyone check your user notes I wanted to thank you all for reading and that's the only way I could think of without spamming this thread ♥
*takes notes* So K'Lari doesn't want me to kill anyone ... well that's one request I can't keep ... *sighs* sorry Lari. Lissy wants me to slow down ... I don't think I have much of a choice there Lissy *sniffles* Ali likes Teddy insensitive ... that's easy Ali, cuz he is ... *Teddy smacks Otty* Connie wants me to transfigure Hagrid into a gorilla ... now there's an idea ... maybe so? *is under advisement* Teddy wants a real gorilla though ... Mione loves my writing ... thanks Mione ... I like it too but ... Lari thinks I'm calm *doesn't know I'm a fatalist* alas ... Kita loves Teddy too ... I think Teddy should be the hero of the fic
And Senorita Maxie loved my ending ...
You all r0x0rs ... seriously. I need to get back to working on this fic. I promise I won't take long if I have to hire a new writer to help any takers?
Neways ... thank you all again and again for all your nice words ... I'm going to go read something for inspiration ... *takes out GWtW* When in doubt, go epic!
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08-28-2009, 12:26 PM
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#79 (permalink)
| Puffskein
Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Florida
Posts: 1,415
Hogwarts RPG Name: Janet Lynn Gordon Fifth Year | Werecats are people too! Reader of Fan Fictions
I think this story is super fantabulous! You have a wonderful way of keeping everything balanced. There's enough humor to lift us above the darkness now and then, enough romance to keep us intrigued, new characters thickens the plot at the right time in the story, and the only thing I can think to help you is reread what you have so far, look at your outline and see if your staying true to it. Now, I hope this helps you find your way, because I want you to finish this story, and not give up on it or us. I care.
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08-28-2009, 04:39 PM
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#80 (permalink)
| DAFC VIP Mooncalf
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 7,184
Hogwarts RPG Name: Atticus Cornridge Second Year x1
| ll Achmed's 2nd Keeper ll Team Jacob l l Otaku ll Well, so long as you don't kill yourself or Ron, I'm happy
*looks up fatalist* I'm the opposite...You're the only force guiding your future
*pets* :hack:s writer's block The best advice I can give you is to write a paragraph of nonsense and see where it takes you Or alternatively, write what you're absolutely sure about and work backwards until you meet up with the last post
Now for critiques....I've got none Like Connie up there ^ ( ) I think you've got everything perfect. I would love to know more about the smaller original characters, though. Like Angel and that girl and Sebastien too |
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08-28-2009, 05:05 PM
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#81 (permalink)
| SS Featured Artist DA Poet Rupert is My Man! SS100 Triumphant Aethonan
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Lovin m wolf & dingo
Posts: 18,891
Hogwarts RPG Name: Ottery St. Catchpole Third Year | OMG! Please note the number of exclamation points in this post its the code to the a Paris & Kellybear r luv :Read Otty 's fics:Gone With the Wind:I♥Rupert Sorry, Connie, I didn't mean to go all spazzstic like that
After I read all the things you guys had to say I went back to the story and realized that ... well, I'm the writer and I make all the rules, so if it doesn't work then it's okay to throw it out, or, as in the case with the post in question ... to move it forward and change the whole setting
I got it written down and I think I'm going to streamline the story a little by having a massacre on the Hogwarts express ... *Teddy beats Otty for giving away the next couple of chapters* Holy cow, I shouldn'a said tha'
Don't worry I'll balance it out with someone falling in love amidst the chaos Quote:
Originally Posted by Connie the only thing I can think to help you is reread what you have so far, look at your outline and see if your staying true to it. Now, I hope this helps you find your way, You're absolutely right Connie. I'm going to sit down and reread everything I've written and see if I'm still going to the same place or if I need to change train stations ... thank you for the advice btw.
All my readers PWN, and Freddie looks especially cute in that pic which is my inspiration! *fires the cannons* and afterwards I'll go watch some iCarly for fun And never fear Connie or the rest of y'all. I will finish this fic ...
Enough mindless chatter from the writer ... pay no attention to the man behind the curtain just watch my story unfold ... *spells you* ♥♥♥
Chapter: Love takes time ... yes it's hard to find, and you've got to take some time to let love grow ...
Harry did not sleep well that night. He couldn‘t, wondering about the boy claiming to be Sirius’ child. He had sent off a letter to Lupin and still received no response. There was no one else he could talk to. So what was he supposed to do? It was so clearly a ruse ... wasn’t it?
Already Harry had made too many mistakes, first Cedric, then Sirius, … who next, Ron or Hermione? He couldn’t stand to think of it. A world without a Ron Weasley or Hermione Granger was just sad and ... evil. << This smilie here just because Kevin likes it ... sorry ... it makes for a good story break.
Harry woke up to a world with Ron Weasley, Luna Lovegood, Ginny Weasley and Hermione Granger all looking down at him standing around his bed.
“What the …” a hand clamped down across his mouth, effectively shutting his pie hole. Harry smiled, realizing it was Ginny.
“I told you all this was a bad idea,” Hermione exclaimed, “coming here, and now breaking and entering.”
“Stop it, Hermione, you were just as worried as the rest of us about Harry,” Ron shot back in a loud whisper. “Besides, he’s glad to see us all, aren’t you, Harry?”
The boy mumbled something, and Ginny let go. "Thank you," he said, giving her a funny smile. Ginny blushed, but not because of Harry's smile. “I'd be a lot gladder if maybe I wasn’t sleeping in my knickers.” The boy pulled up his bed sheets, “Do you girls mind?”
Ginny had blushed at that.
Hermione merely rolled her eyes, “as if I’d care to see you in your trunks," she exclaimed.
And Luna looked at him quizzically, “Do you mean there’s a lizard under your bed sheet? Do you wear lizards to bed? Is that a muggle thing?”
“The girl’s’ll wait outside, won’t you girls?” Ron said, shoving the girls out of Harry’s room into the hallway. “Sorry about that mate,” Ron continued nervously, “but we met someone weird and they said you were in danger and … with everything going on in the world and stuff. We were right to come, look how easily we got into your house? The ministry doesn’t have anyone looking out for you or anything?”
Harry got out of bed and rummaged through the piles of clothes in his room, sniffing to find a pair of pants that weren’t too dirty, and pulling out his last clean shirt from his dresser. It was a top that had a picture of The Flying Monkees (Ottery’s band) rocking out.
“What are you talking about, I don’t have protection? I don’t want any. Dumbledore says I’m safe here."
There was a loud scream from the hallway and Ron opened the door to find Luna trying to offer Aunt Petunia a copy of The Quibbler. Behind her, Uncle Vernon was turning every shade of red and from the looks of it about to pop like an angry red balloon.
“Okay, we’re out of here,” Harry said, letting Hedwig out of her cage, grabbing his broom, his cloak, and his wand and pushing all of his friends down the stairs.
“That! Is! Quite! Enough!” Uncle Vernon screamed.
“It was a pleasure to meet you all,” Hermione said, as Ron pulled her down the steps by her shirt sleeves. Luna waved. And Harry kept pushing everyone down the stairs until they were out the door and everyone had stepped out of the house.
“You all couldn’t have kept just a little quiet? I haven’t even had a chance to eat breakfast,” Harry turned on all of his friends, complaining.
“There’s always Waffle House,” Luna remarked, “Ottery took me there once. I loved their waffles.”
“That’s in The States, Luna,” Ginny remarked. “Let’s go get some coffee or something. Is there a wizarding café or diner nearby?”
“If there is, Hermione’ll know about it, won’t you, love?” Ron asked. The girl with the long brown curly hair and the crush on Ronald Weasley blushed at his choice of words and everyone seemed to pause. “What?” He asked, “Okay, so maybe Hermione won’t know where it is. Harry, do you have a map?”
Ginny knocked her brother on the shoulder and they all started walking down the street. Hermione took Harry’s broom and cloak and put them in her ‘special’ purse', where she could fit an endless array of things in what was magically an endless bag. ♥ Chapter: You've got to take some time, to let love grow ...
The dark haired boy landed on the ground with an almighty thump. He smiled, even as the voice next to him said, "Move your as. Protego!"
A magical shield appeared above them, causing the molten oil that rained down to fall around them creating a smokescreen. Ottery felt his companion pushing him as the familiar twang of arrows leaving their bows sang in his ears. Soon after, he heard an accompaniment of thuds, the arrows landing on the wall behind them and the ground around them.
Everywhere people were trying to kill them, yet somehow the dark haired boy could not deny it was fun. Ottery called up a wind spell and the dust around the courtyard flew around them, offering them some cover.
“Thanks,” his rescuer whispered as he used his wand to dispatch a few Death Eaters.
“What’s with the cloak?” Ottery asked. His only reply was the boy handing Ottery a wand. It was mesquite, with dragon heartstring. Ottery had a standing order at Olivanders, as often as he lost his wands, broke them, or just mangled them in the course of his adventures, he had to. The dark haired boy had done a lot of things with wands, much to the dread of some of his enemies. Ottery was not above poking people up the nose (an idea he got from Ron).
“Don’t just stand there, fools! Stop them!” Rodolphus exclaimed, as he stared at his beautiful plan slowly crumbling into dust. “Damn you, Ottery St. Catchpole. If it’s the last thing I do, I’ll see your head on a pike!”
Blasts flew all around them. The dark haired boy could see nothing through the dust or the smoke of the boiling oil. It would only be a matter of seconds before the others conjured up a spell to destroy their smokescreen.
“So, how are we getting out of here, Teddy?” the dark haired boy asked.
The cloaked figure ducked as a killing curse flew past him. Ottery barely missed being attacked by a bat bogey and jumped out of the way of a hex when he saw some of the triad’s foot soldiers walking into the smoke. He punched one in the nose, set another’s feet to dancing and hexed another one with a wedgie he would not soon forget. Happy with himself, Ottery did not see that someone approached behind him. Out of nowhere his rescuer draped his cloak around Ottery and the dark haired boy saw the spell bounce off of the cloak.
The other boy's long dark cloak worked as a shield deflecting spells.
“Neat cloak,” Ottery said, jealously.
“We need to get out of here. On my mark, make the smoke disappear, okay?”
"Oh crap!" Ottery exclaimed.
"Why are we stopping? HELLO? Imminent danger all around us, much!"
"The boulders!"
The boulders came flying at them with all the speed of a bird falling to catch it's prey. Already Ottery could hear Pagliacci. "It's Pavarotti ... so I guess it's not always a fat lady singing." ♥ AEN: These two posts ... you two get two! You lucky readers you ... << this smilie here just because Kevin likes it ... OMG! They're dedicated to all my faithful readers, you all inspire me, and I would not quit this fic, for nothin'. In a rush gotta go ... love you all, and thank you again, Connie, for the nice words ... *Please note I'm following the comma rule about addressing individuals* 'cuz Love takes time and it's hard to find ... you've got to take some time to let love grow ...
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08-28-2009, 05:07 PM
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#82 (permalink)
| SS Featured Artist DA Poet Rupert is My Man! SS100 Triumphant Aethonan
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Lovin m wolf & dingo
Posts: 18,891
Hogwarts RPG Name: Ottery St. Catchpole Third Year | Paris & Kellybear r luv :Read Otty 's fics:Gone With the Wind:I♥Rupert
Ah, Lari, you caught me with my pants down so to speak, this is SS and you're right, and the funny thing is I was just thinking about that for another story I'm writing ... Quote:
Originally Posted by The Wise Obi-Wan K'Lari You're the only force guiding your future You're so right ... you're write ...
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08-28-2009, 05:57 PM
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#83 (permalink)
| DAFC VIP Mooncalf
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 7,184
Hogwarts RPG Name: Atticus Cornridge Second Year x1
| ll Achmed's 2nd Keeper ll Team Jacob l l Otaku ll Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole And never fear Connie or the rest of y'all. I will finish this fic ... Good! Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole [COLOR="DarkRed"][FONT="Comic Sans MS"]
Harry woke up to a world with Ron Weasley, Luna Lovegood, Ginny Weasley and Hermione Granger all looking down at him standing around his bed. Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole [COLOR="DarkRed"][FONT="Comic Sans MS"]
“I'd be a lot gladder if maybe I wasn’t sleeping in my knickers.” The boy pulled up his bed sheets, “Do you girls mind?”
Ginny had blushed at that.
Hermione merely rolled her eyes, “as if I’d care to see you in your trunks," she exclaimed.
And Luna looked at him quizzically, “Do you mean there’s a lizard under your bed sheet? Do you wear lizards to bed? Is that a muggle thing?” I loved this exchange Soooo Luna! Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole [COLOR="DarkRed"][FONT="Comic Sans MS"] There was a loud scream from the hallway and Ron opened the door to find Luna trying to offer Aunt Petunia a copy of The Quibbler. Priceless. Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole [COLOR="DarkRed"][FONT="Comic Sans MS"]
Ottery was not above poking people up the nose (an idea he got from Ron). Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole [COLOR="DarkRed"][FONT="Comic Sans MS"] hexed another one with a wedgie he would not soon forget. Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole [COLOR="DarkRed"][FONT="Comic Sans MS"]
The other boy's long dark cloak worked as a shield deflecting spells. Oooooh! Cool!
OhMcGee! They can't die now! Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole Ah, Lari, you caught me with my pants down so to speak, this is SS and you're right, and the funny thing is I was just thinking about that for another story I'm writing ...
You're so right ... you're write ...
Another story? You're getting busy aren't you? can't wait for that one either I just realized how Star Wars that was..."you're the force" |
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08-29-2009, 01:08 AM
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#84 (permalink)
| Puffskein
Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Florida
Posts: 1,415
Hogwarts RPG Name: Janet Lynn Gordon Fifth Year | Werecats are people too! Reader of Fan Fictions
Such a delight, you, and your posts! I did notice the proper useage of commas, and appreciate your endeavor with useing them correct. They are a struggle for me when I'm trying to decide when to use them. Then, when I do finally decide, I have forgotten what I was writing about.
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08-29-2009, 03:03 AM
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#85 (permalink)
| Admires Ginny's Sanity DA Galleon KeeperSS Featured Author Snidget
Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Limerick =)
Posts: 2,554
Hogwarts RPG Name: Mione Borthwick Sixth Year | Quote:
Mione loves my writing ... thanks Mione ... I like it too but ...
*snuggles*
Truly wonderful as always Otts. Adored the Ron/Hermy and Ginny/Harry moments. Made me all giggly with happiness And Luna put me in the mood for some waffles...mmm
And, there is nothing like some great Ottery and Teddy get-away-action =D
I can't wait for more!!
Luff,
Mione |
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08-29-2009, 07:39 PM
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#86 (permalink)
| Pogrebin
Join Date: May 2009 Location: London
Posts: 32,839
Hogwarts RPG Name: Alexander River Hirsch Gryffindor Third Year Hogwarts RPG Name: -- Ministry RPG Name:
Zhuó Xiá Li Ministry RPG Name:
Grayson Douglas Whitlock Accidents & Catastrophes x11 x11
| urine trouble | Pat's Strong Confident Other Half | Pees Like a Champion Unicorn Racehorse Wow! Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Luna broke into Harry's house?! How?! Wow! Haha! I was laughing so much at the part when Harry said he's only wearing trunks! Ha! And the part when Luna offered Petunia the Quibbler! That was funny as well! Luna's too funny. Ooh! Go Teddy! Go Ottery! That cloak sounds very, very good! Wonder where Teddy got it from? Haha! That wedgie part! I was laughing so much even though i was so anxious to find out if Teddy and Ottery get out. Hope Teddy and Ottery get out! *crosses fingers* Great post! Loved it! Can't wait for more!
Kita
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08-31-2009, 02:19 AM
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#87 (permalink)
| Jarvey
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 622
Hogwarts RPG Name: GinnyWeasleyPotter First Year |
cool...cool...love it when Harry smiles everytime he sees Ginny....love this story...
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09-01-2009, 09:26 AM
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#88 (permalink)
| SS Featured Artist DA Poet Rupert is My Man! SS100 Triumphant Aethonan
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Lovin m wolf & dingo
Posts: 18,891
Hogwarts RPG Name: Ottery St. Catchpole Third Year | Ottery replies ... in the form of a fic ... maybe sort of ... Paris & Kellybear r luv :Read Otty 's fics:Gone With the Wind:I♥Rupert
Aboard the Starship Enterprise ...
Obi-Wan K'Lari, we meet again ... only in another universe *Ottery puts away his tricorder and takes out his light saber* As I said Lari, I will finish this fic, it's going to take me a long time to do it. But I will finish it. I've got kids don't look at me like that ... and I do post regularly not like say Jo. When was her last book, huh? Just sayin'
I'm glad you think my writing is funny Lari and I love that you love my Luna. As for who's dying I'm not saying and uhm, YES, I'm very busy. My personal life is spiraling out of control ... and well, look at my profile go to my Lj and you'll see. I'm working on other non-HP or fanfiction stuffs so ... not much there but it will explode soon I hope.
Ottery walked down the street when suddenly he spotted somoene he thought he would never see again *uuuuhh dramatic not to mention ironic* Connie was there.
Connie, I never thought I'd see you again ... not after ... not after our last assignment *saving the magical world from Godzilla* Ottery looked away with tears in his eyes ... Thank you for noticing my commas, Connie and liking my story. I try. Dreaming so many things up is hard work. But you're always here and I love that ... which is what makes writing so much fun. People to read my stuff. There I admitted it, read it, enjoy it, becasue I'm going to edit it out once you read it and deny it ever afterwards
Suddenly an explosion rang out and Ottery turned to Mione ... "Quickly or all is lost."
*snuggles back* I'm glad you're here Mione ... you're Old school too. I love that my readers always come back ... it makes me think my stuff is actually good
As for the Ottery&Teddy getaway action ... *censored because it's a spoiler* and you ain't seen nothin' yet.
"I think it's over between us now," Ottery exclaimed. Suddenly, he ran crying into Kita's arms ... "But I'm still in love with ..."
I'm glad you like the humor Kita, but ... it's not all laughs and fun for Harry and the gang ... but that's next post ... I think ... I am so far ahead in this story I'm already plotting the first of many romantic balls I shouldn'a said tha', I shouldn'a said tha'
As for Otty's escape *censored for spoilage* wow, remember kids, always check the date on the milk before you drink it.
And in conclusion, ...
The explosion rendered the world moot. Reality was chaos and Ottery was not wearing his lucky boxers which meant ... saving humanity from the evils of capitalism and bad television was not going to be easy. Still, being the world's greatest superhero wizard had it's perks. "I love cookies," he said and blasted off again. Reina thank you for reading! Welcome aboard, and Ihope you like romance because this story will be chock full of it. Look for it, chances are if two characters are smiling at each other across the table IT ISN'T just a coincidence. And thank you for reading ... have a Ron icon. I make icons now Feel free to use but don't hotlink. Those were the replies, now onto the real fic. |
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09-01-2009, 09:39 AM
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#89 (permalink)
| SS Featured Artist DA Poet Rupert is My Man! SS100 Triumphant Aethonan
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Lovin m wolf & dingo
Posts: 18,891
Hogwarts RPG Name: Ottery St. Catchpole Third Year | Big reveal ... *gasp* Paris & Kellybear r luv :Read Otty 's fics:Gone With the Wind:I♥Rupert ♥ Chapter: When you left I lost a part of me ... is this so hard to believe, come back baby please cuz we belong together ... She slapped him hard across the face, tears streaming down her own face. How dare he! Of all the cold, conniving, evil, son of a *ahem* things to do.
Her hands were fists at either side of her. Her arms like columns holding up the frail edifice that was her person after seeing him again. After everything.
"How dare you?" she said in a controlled voice. In her mind she had uttered it as a scream and followed it with a killing curse.
He merely stood there and took it.
She raised her hands like catapults her fists raining down like stones on his person and still he did nothing to stop her. The building of her composure be damned she didn't mind falling a collapsed heap in his arms so long as she took him down with her. It hurt so much. It hurt worse than any physical pain she could endure and she had endured much in her life. It hurt in the way that those pains that crush souls feel. It hurt the way loss hurts. It hurt like absence because that was what it was. He had left her at her most vulnerable and here he was again.
"You evil ..." she proceeded to rain him down with foul words, ugly words, phrases the devil would cringe to fathom much less dare speak (nothing you'd hear on South Park because they have some standards, if that gives you any clue).
He stood there and took it.
Sebastian knew what he had done was wrong, he knew that he deserved it. Sebastian was many things. He was the least of all the things she said but, mostly those. And all her blows, all her taunts, all her rage could never compare to what he felt the instant he had left her in the hands of their enemies.
"I endured tortures for you. I endured hells unimaginable on a scale you cannot begin to fathom and do you know why? Because I loved you! I LOVED YOU! You vicious," and the invectives would begin again. "I suffered for you. Safe in the knowledge that you would not ... that you would at least come back to me. I should have seen it in your face. You walked away and left me there. You left me in their hands. You walked away while I stayed and suffered. You took ... you bast--" her voice cracked under the strain of so much emotion.
She struck him again, she struck him across the chest, she slapped him, she kicked him, she buried her nails in his flesh as she grabbed him.
"Strike back you ... Coward. You dog. You less than man thing."
"But I still love you," he said, and with those words she crumbled. Nothing he could do could hurt her as much as uttering those words, after all these years.
"Please. Please get out. Please ... or I'll kill you."
"I'm so sorry ..."
"You don't understand. You're such a man ... I've been too long in the wind, too long in the rain, taking any comfort that I can ..."
Draco Malfoy walked into the room. "Mother, is everything all right?" ♥ AN: Narcissa's quote at the end ... is partly from a Dixie Chicks song. Gotta give credit where credit is due.
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09-01-2009, 11:42 AM
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#90 (permalink)
| Puffskein
Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Florida
Posts: 1,415
Hogwarts RPG Name: Janet Lynn Gordon Fifth Year | Werecats are people too! Reader of Fan Fictions
GASP!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh My!!!!!!!!!! Talk about not being able to put down a good book! I'm sitting here watching with anticipation for another post to appear.
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09-02-2009, 06:00 PM
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#91 (permalink)
| Pogrebin
Join Date: May 2009 Location: London
Posts: 32,839
Hogwarts RPG Name: Alexander River Hirsch Gryffindor Third Year Hogwarts RPG Name: -- Ministry RPG Name:
Zhuó Xiá Li Ministry RPG Name:
Grayson Douglas Whitlock Accidents & Catastrophes x11 x11
| urine trouble | Pat's Strong Confident Other Half | Pees Like a Champion Unicorn Racehorse Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole Aw! "It's ok, Ottery. It's ok"
Ooh! It's going to get romantic! I agree with Connie (^hi). That was brilliant! Wow! Narcissa loved Sebastian? And their enemies tortured her? Who are their enemies? Wow! Great post! Loved it! Can't wait for more!
Kita
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09-02-2009, 06:18 PM
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#92 (permalink)
| SS Featured AuthorTürk Bilgini Bugbear
Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: {in a leap of faith}
Posts: 31,791
Hogwarts RPG Name: Sarani Glass Graduated Ministry RPG Name:
Sion Logan Jetza x12
| ♥ Mrs. Itachi Uchiha™ & MAJNOO! : Bleach & Kyo & Natsume ♥ [ Maxh!Jesh ] I'm so tired. =[
Too tired to read all of it. But I read one of the updates, and I loved it. Will definitely come back tomorrow to give a proper review.
Keep posting. You make my day. <3 |
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09-03-2009, 04:16 AM
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#93 (permalink)
| Firecrab
Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: In Daniel's arms!
Posts: 888
Hogwarts RPG Name: Michelle Wingmist Fourth Year Ministry RPG Name:
Rachel Rodriguez Magical Games & Sports | Inquisitive
Hi Otty, I love to read this fic, and I'm really sorry to have replied after your second post, and then to have come back again after SO MANY posts!!!! I really wanted to read it, but EVERY stupid time I tried to click on this, something would happen to my internet connection and it'd get stuck at the same page every time!!!!! But worry not, I read everything you posted after that time, and it is refreshing!!!!! You certainly are really creative, and a brilliant writer!!!! This plot that you and Teddy created is fantastic, and I can't wait to see what happens in the END. here I am studying throughout the day for my exams and not getting time to write my OWN Fic. At this kind of a moment, reading this is just heavenly!!! PAMS!!!
Tina.
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Amanda's Amazing Art- Thanks!
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09-03-2009, 02:20 PM
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#94 (permalink)
| Blast-Ended Skrewt
Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: CrazyTown
Posts: 16,126
| The Sweetest Thing Lissy De Vil
*races in and trips* OOOFFF! *steps on something soft* Who was that? Sorry!
Lissy stands up straightening clothes and tries to look dignified.
Anyway! *smooches Otts* Quote:
Lissy wants me to slow down ... I don't think I have much of a choice there Lissy *sniffles*
You go at your own pace, I only tease! And don't worry this is brilliant. Quote:
Chapter: Love takes time ... yes it's hard to find, and you've got to take some time to let love grow ...
Love this song, btw! Still appreciating the 80s tunes. Quote:
The boy mumbled something, and Ginny let go. "Thank you," he said, giving her a funny smile. Ginny blushed, but not because of Harry's smile. “I'd be a lot gladder if maybe I wasn’t sleeping in my knickers.” The boy pulled up his bed sheets, “Do you girls mind?”
Ginny had blushed at that.
Hermione merely rolled her eyes, “as if I’d care to see you in your trunks," she exclaimed.
And Luna looked at him quizzically, “Do you mean there’s a lizard under your bed sheet? Do you wear lizards to bed? Is that a muggle thing?”
Ahahahahaha! Luna is priceless. Quote:
“If there is, Hermione’ll know about it, won’t you, love?” Ron asked. The girl with the long brown curly hair and the crush on Ronald Weasley blushed at his choice of words and everyone seemed to pause. “What?” He asked, “Okay, so maybe Hermione won’t know where it is. Harry, do you have a map?”
A bit of a verbal slip there, eh? Quote:
The dark haired boy landed on the ground with an almighty thump. He smiled, even as the voice next to him said, "Move your as. Protego!"
I knew you'd be ok! Ottery is just not that easy to kill. Silly Death Eaters. Quote:
Everywhere people were trying to kill them, yet somehow the dark haired boy could not deny it was fun.
Interesting idea of fun. O_O Quote:
“What’s with the cloak?” Ottery asked. His only reply was the boy handing Ottery a wand. It was mesquite, with dragon heartstring. Ottery had a standing order at Olivanders, as often as he lost his wands, broke them, or just mangled them in the course of his adventures, he had to. The dark haired boy had done a lot of things with wands, much to the dread of some of his enemies. Ottery was not above poking people up the nose (an idea he got from Ron).
Oh My! Quote:
The cloaked figure ducked as a killing curse flew past him. Ottery barely missed being attacked by a bat bogey and jumped out of the way of a hex when he saw some of the triad’s foot soldiers walking into the smoke. He punched one in the nose, set another’s feet to dancing and hexed another one with a wedgie he would not soon forget. Happy with himself, Ottery did not see that someone approached behind him. Out of nowhere his rescuer draped his cloak around Ottery and the dark haired boy saw the spell bounce off of the cloak.
Ok, I'd like to see you fight but would never want to be on the receiving end.
Looking forward to seeing what happens next in this scene... Quote:
"How dare you?" she said in a controlled voice. In her mind she had uttered it as a scream and followed it with a killing curse.
I know that feeling... Quote:
"But I still love you," he said, and with those words she crumbled. Nothing he could do could hurt her as much as uttering those words, after all these years.
*sigh* Quote:
"You don't understand. You're such a man ... I've been too long in the wind, too long in the rain, taking any comfort that I can ..."
Draco Malfoy walked into the room. "Mother, is everything all right?"
Ok, I didn't see that one coming! Interesting!
Naughty Otter leaving such intriguing questions behind.
I only quoted you most recent posts, but I am up to date and ready for more.
PS: Love the first post banner!
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09-04-2009, 04:54 PM
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#95 (permalink)
| DAFC VIP Mooncalf
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 7,184
Hogwarts RPG Name: Atticus Cornridge Second Year x1
| ll Achmed's 2nd Keeper ll Team Jacob l l Otaku ll
*pulls out her blue light saber* Yes...it's been to long OtterMan... Yay for Otter's fics Aw, I'm sorry about all the craziness, luff. Obstacles make you stronger, right? o_O I look forward to the Fics-to-Come Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole ♥ ZOMG! I love this pic Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole [SIZE="3"][FONT="Georgia"] Her hands were fists at either side of her. Her arms like columns holding up the frail edifice that was her person after seeing him again. After everything. I love this description! It's so poetic Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole Sebastian knew what he had done was wrong, he knew that he deserved it. Sebastian was many things. He was the least of all the things she said but, mostly those. And all her blows, all her taunts, all her rage could never compare to what he felt the instant he had left her in the hands of their enemies. Is it weird that this makes me like Sebastian even more? Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole "But I still love you," he said, and with those words she crumbled. Nothing he could do could hurt her as much as uttering those words, after all these years. Aw! Quote:
Originally Posted by OtterySt.Catchpole Draco Malfoy walked into the room. "Mother, is everything all right?" HOLY ! I can't wait for more! |
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09-04-2009, 04:56 PM
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#96 (permalink)
| SS Featured Artist DA Poet Rupert is My Man! SS100 Triumphant Aethonan
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Lovin m wolf & dingo
Posts: 18,891
Hogwarts RPG Name: Ottery St. Catchpole Third Year | This post is for Connie cuz she's going on holiday but mostly cuz she PWNS Paris & Kellybear r luv :Read Otty 's fics:Gone With the Wind:I♥Rupert Disclaimer: This post is full of smilies. OMG! Beware seizures ... And I'm so tired of having to live without you
But I don't mind.
Sleeping to dream about you and I'm so tired
And I'm sure Lissy will recognize this song ... Slow change may pull us apart
When the light gets into your heart, baby
Don't You Forget About Me
Don't Don't Don't Don't
Don't You Forget About Me
Will you stand above me?
Look my way, never love me
Rain keeps falling, rain keeps falling
Down, down, down Chapter: Stir it up, got to shake it up now ...
The boy walked into the building, and five minutes later the explosions began. Teddy had arrived, and he wanted answers. ♥ Chapter: *lots of Japanese words Ottery doesn't understand* Beautiful World ...
"It's not the Waffle House but, it's good," Luna declared as she ate her strawberry covered waffles.
"Few things can ever be the Waffle House Luna," Ron said laughing.
"Yes, well, nothing beats having dinner with Ottery," Hermione remarked trying to remind Ron that Luna had gone with Ottery to Waffle House, she had not been alone.
"Yeah, like you and he did in India." Ron shot back suddenly reminded of something else entirely.
"That was ... we were undercover in India and ..." Hermione blushed. How had he remembered that?
"That's where you kissed him isn't it?" Ginny interjected suddenly. She gave Hermione a look.
"It wasn't me who kissed him, Ginny. Ottery kissed me." Hermione replied, making a point of the correction.
Ron said nothing but stuffed his face with a forkful of waffles.
Ginny shrugged and Hermione sighed, waving it off. Boys are weird and stupid. Hermione drank her tea and stared out the window.
Harry didn't know what had just happened but, he knew that Ginny and Hermione had been using some sort of secret 'girl' language that boys couldn't interpret. And Ottery and Hermione had kissed? He blushed at the thought. His kissing had been with Cho only and ... while pleasant, the way their relationship had kind of exploded at the end there, it still stung him. Harry didn't really want to think about romance. It was nice to have someone like Ginny who was interested in the same things he was and that he could talk to, like one of the guys.
"So, how is Dean?" Hermione asked and Harry only just caught the look she had given Ginny.
"He's being a sweetheart. He sent me an owl and said he's missing me."
"Wait Dean what?" Ron exploded with the words that wouldn't come out of Harry's mouth. A dragon deep inside his chest roared and Harry wondered for a second if it couldn't be indigestion but, that thought was soon gone as the waitress stopped by their table and dropped the check.
"Wait we didn't ..." Hermione complained.
"I know honey but, I can smell a fight coming a mile away and I don't fancy cleaning up the mess, luv," the woman said.
Hermione turned to look at the strangers at the door. It was a group of young Death Eaters, likely new recruits, being led by Bellatrix. Bellatrix who wore a smile on her face like it was Christmas and she had just received Harry Potter bound in a bow.
"Well, well, what have we here?" she asked, punctuating the question with a cackling laugh.
"Back exit," Harry commanded. But, as they turned to go Ron stopped holding his arm out so the girls could go no further. A tall behemoth, a wall of a man stood there looking every kind of angry and next to him, Fenrir Greyback grinned a wolfish grin and still, next to him Luna recognized the werewolf boy who had told them about the imminent attack on Harry's life. The werewolf boy put a finger to his lips.
"I know you," Luna said. "I don't think I like you, anymore."
The boy shrugged. "I'm sorry about that." He turned to Greyback, "I told you my plan would work, sir."
"You traitorous, scum ball," Ron began but, I can't write what else he said. Suffice it to say it left Hermione blushing, Harry smiling wickedly, Luna impressed and Ginny completely embarrassed that her brother even knew half those words. ♥ AN: I love you guys ... girls Ali didn't post so it's girls only. I'm sorry I don't have time for replies, all the things you said are too sweet Tina , Connie, I'll miss you when you're on holiday you always post but when you get back you'll have ton of story to read ... I think. Lissy you're a love and I love that you always recognize the songs ... the 80's PWN'd. Maxie, I think you disappeared but I love your stories so if you disappear from mine at least post to Road ... I love that fic. Kita this whole fic is full of love ... like in this post can you see the love quadrangles starting? But those annoying Death Eaters always have to interrupt love *sighs* Back laterz y'all ... go hang out at the FC's they're like so empty ... And before anyone asks, that annoying wolf boy's name is ... *waits for it* Maxie Zeus ... but I couldn't work it into this or the following posts ... don't be so quick to judge Maxie though he's ... okay he's evil judge away. Replies next time ... promise.
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09-04-2009, 04:59 PM
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#97 (permalink)
| SS Featured Artist DA Poet Rupert is My Man! SS100 Triumphant Aethonan
Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Lovin m wolf & dingo
Posts: 18,891
Hogwarts RPG Name: Ottery St. Catchpole Third Year | Paris & Kellybear r luv :Read Otty 's fics:Gone With the Wind:I♥Rupert
Obi Wan K'lari I guess you won't have to wait too long ... you always sneak in, I think my force is a little low on batteries I need to recharge my force *throws his lightsaber at you and runs* I'll be back Obi ... until then deal with :yoda:
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09-04-2009, 05:23 PM
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#98 (permalink)
| Blast-Ended Skrewt
Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: CrazyTown
Posts: 16,126
| The Sweetest Thing Lissy De Vil Quote:
And I'm sure Lissy will recognize this song ...
LOVE! Quote:
The boy walked into the building, and five minutes later the explosions began. Teddy had arrived, and he wanted answers.
That's one way to make an entrance... and get answers. Teddy has style! Quote:
"It's not the Waffle House but, it's good," Luna declared as she ate her strawberry covered waffles.
I forgot to say, Luna made me want waffles last post and now I want them again. No Waffle Houses near me that I know of... We do have an IHOP. Quote:
"Yes, well, nothing beats having dinner with Ottery," Hermione remarked trying to remind Ron that Luna had gone with Ottery to Waffle House, she had not been alone.
hehehe good one! And true I am sure. Quote:
"Yeah, like you and he did in India." Ron shot back suddenly reminded of something else entirely.
"That was ... we were undercover in India and ..." Hermione blushed. How had he remembered that?
"That's where you kissed him isn't it?" Ginny interjected suddenly. She gave Hermione a look.
"It wasn't me who kissed him, Ginny. Ottery kissed me." Hermione replied, making a point of the correction.
Oh that Otts! Quote:
Harry didn't really want to think about romance. It was nice to have someone like Ginny who was interested in the same things he was and that he could talk to, like one of the guys.
Poor clueless Harry. Quote:
"Wait Dean what?" Ron exploded with the words that wouldn't come out of Harry's mouth. A dragon deep inside his chest roared and Harry wondered for a second if it couldn't be indigestion but, that thought was soon gone as the waitress stopped by their table and dropped the check.
Quote:
Hermione turned to look at the strangers at the door. It was a group of young Death Eaters, likely new recruits, being led by Bellatrix. Bellatrix who wore a smile on her face like it was Christmas and she had just received Harry Potter bound in a bow.
Uh Oh. Love Bella though. Quote:
... next to him Luna recognized the werewolf boy who had told them about the imminent attack on Harry's life. The werewolf boy put a finger to his lips.
"I know you," Luna said. "I don't think I like you, anymore."
The boy shrugged. "I'm sorry about that." He turned to Greyback, "I told you my plan would work, sir."
Verrrrrrrry interesting. Love Luna. Quote:
"You traitorous, scum ball," Ron began but, I can't write what else he said. Suffice it to say it left Hermione blushing, Harry smiling wickedly, Luna impressed and Ginny completely embarrassed that her brother even knew half those words.
hehehehe Good one!
Otts, we all love ya back and please do not stress if you can't make full quote replies every time. It's a lot of work to read all our comments and reply (I know!) and I am sure, like myself, everyone is very happy that you remember to say something personal to us each time. No need to worry of you can't make long posts. Quote:
And before anyone asks, that annoying wolf boy's name is ... *waits for it* Maxie Zeus ... but I couldn't work it into this or the following posts ... don't be so quick to judge Maxie though he's ... okay he's evil judge away.
*ponders* ?
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09-04-2009, 07:42 PM
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#99 (permalink)
| Puffskein
Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Florida
Posts: 1,415
Hogwarts RPG Name: Janet Lynn Gordon Fifth Year | Werecats are people too! Reader of Fan Fictions
Thanks for the great post. I love how you have Harry so clueless like Lissydove (^ hi) says. Just wait till that dragon wakes him up. And, Maxie Zeus, hummm, my imagination is getting the best of me, so I'll have to ponder on this awhile. And just so you know, (see your user notes) and don't hurt yourself laughing at me, but I had to ask my son what, PWNS, means. Thank you, and I'll catch you later, and until then- be happy, enjoy life and laugh a lot.
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09-06-2009, 12:31 PM
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#100 (permalink)
| SS Featured AuthorTürk Bilgini Bugbear
Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: {in a leap of faith}
Posts: 31,791
Hogwarts RPG Name: Sarani Glass Graduated Ministry RPG Name:
Sion Logan Jetza x12
| ♥ Mrs. Itachi Uchiha™ & MAJNOO! : Bleach & Kyo & Natsume ♥ [ Maxh!Jesh ] *points*
YOU AWESOME WRITER, YOUUUU!
I love thy work, OttySt. It makes me feel awesome'eth. Quote:
Suffice it to say it left Hermione blushing, Harry smiling wickedly, Luna impressed and Ginny completely embarrassed that her brother even knew half those words.
I want more, more, more storyyy! =DD |
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