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Old 06-04-2008, 06:04 PM   #18 (permalink)
Phoenix 8390
Gryffindor
Billywig
 
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 3,117

Hogwarts RPG Name:
Alexander James Wright
First Year
Default
Elder Quad

Realization


Crash. They’re fighting again. I can hear them. It’s not like I wouldn’t hear them though. I’m sitting beside the couch playing with my dolls in my makeshift fort. They don’t see me because I’m well hidden. The only light coming in the living room is from the moon and it’s not hitting me. I don’t understand why they’re fighting. Clearly they’re not happy, but they don’t even care that I’m sitting right here.

Another crash. My mom threw a plate. My dad curses, but he doesn’t put a finger on her. He was taught better as a boy. I hear a door open as well, but I can’t peel my eyes away from the scene my parents are making. I know it’s my brother. Maybe if I stand in front of my parents they’ll stop because they won’t want to fight in front of me. It’s worth a shot. So I stand and walk towards them. It is then when I realize what a bad headache I have.

They don’t see me. Typical. But the scene I see makes the tears begin to flow. And the worst part is they don’t even seem to care. I feel a pair of strong arms pick me up. My brother has been watching me the whole time. He glares at my parents, who have finally gone silent with shock, and then walks me into his room. They begin to fight again, but about a completely different topic. Me, probably. I can’t do more than cry at this point, so I bury my face in Rocco’s chest. He’s never seen me cry like this before and I know it’s bothering him. I can feel it.

My brother is a strong person, even if he denies it. He believes this whole thing is partially his fault, no matter how many times I assure him it’s not. His best friend even tells him not to blame himself, but he still does. He feels like he isn’t living up to the brotherly expectations lay down by so many generations before us. But I feel he is doing a fine job. He’s only fifteen, what more can he do? He’s trying to be more than he can handle and I think he should chill. He’s not an adult and has no need to act like one yet. But, I must say, without him I would want to run away.

Hours pass without sleep, until I’m finally able to slip into unconsciousness. I feel Rocco place me under his covers and I huddle close to him. There’s no way I’m going in my own bed tonight, he can sense that. I haven’t slept in my own bed in ages. Really, it’s been a while. I mostly stay with Rocco in his room, even during the daytime. We both don’t want to hear one of our parents bash the other one while they’re away. It would be like them poisoning our minds against our other parent. Now, I’m only eight years old, but I know that isn’t right. So Rocco and I spend a lot of time together, which is why we’re so close. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I awake before my brother and all I can do is stare at him. I know he had a restless sleep. Don’t ask me how, but I just know. He then awakes suddenly and looks directly back at me. I have questions, so I ask, even though I already know the answer. Maybe he’ll come to some conclusion based on that. “Why did you do that?” I ask quietly. “Do what?” he asks, clearly looking puzzled. He’s playing games. He knows what I’m talking about. I sigh deeply. “Take me away from them last night. Why’d you do that Rocco?” He sighs this time and squeezes my hand gently. “I didn’t want you to witness that. They shouldn’t have fought in front of you. It was wrong…” he trails off and I understand that’s all we need to say on the matter.

I bury my face into his chest again. I’m trying to hold in my sobs as I speak again. “Why do they fight so violently?” I whisper. It’s getting harder and harder to hold in my tears, but I must for the sake of my brother. He has to know he’s doing a good job keeping me safe and this won’t help. “I don’t know Leah. I wish I knew. They’re not happy anymore.” I sigh brokenly, apparently the wrong thing to do because his grip tightens around me. “You should talk to them. They’ll listen to you, not me. I’m only eight,” I pause. “They need a divorce Rocco. I can’t live like this anymore. I’m…s-scared.” I know this can’t be a good thing to say, but someone does have to talk to our parents. It’s the only thing I can think of.

I know this shocks him. He didn’t think the word ‘scared’ was even in my vocabulary. That’s probably why it took a while to come out. “Leah…I...I have to talk to them. You’re right. I have to do it…today.” Good Rocco. I sit up and finger a strand of my brown hair as I think about the pros and cons of the situation at hand. . “Get dressed. After I’m done talking to them we’ll go for ice cream to get out of this house,” he says confidently. At this point, I can’t help but smile at him. I kiss his forehead then jump off the bed and go out the door to my room. I hear Rocco leave his room after I shut my door and I silently hope that our parents don’t hurt him. Well, my mother at least.

Ten minutes pass and my father knocks on my door. He walks in to find me at my piano. I enjoy playing music. It seems to be the only thing that makes sense anymore. He brings me into the kitchen. They offer me a chair, but I climb up onto Rocco’s lap. I’d feel too vulnerable sitting alone. They finally tell us they’re getting a divorce. It’s a horrible thing, but I’m singing the Hallelujah chorus in my head.

They decide that I automatically go to my mother seeing as she is the primary caregiver of our household, no matter how false that may be. Rocco decides to come with me as well, much to the disappointment of my father. I know Rocco wouldn’t dare leave me alone with my mother and I know he’s determined to have my father take me back. I wait for that day. My mother moves us to France where Rocco will attend Beauxbatons. I’m only eight so I will go to a French elementary school until it’s my time to go to Beauxbatons as well. I just hope I don’t have any premature bouts of magic in class.

Rocco is allowed to visit my father whenever he wants. I, on the other hand, get to go every other weekend to see him in Ireland. It’s not fair, but I’ll have to live with it for the time being. On the bright side, I do get to go to my friend Jae’s house whenever I want. His family knows what I’ve been through and Mrs. Maguire always welcomes me with open arms. I go to Rocco’s best friend’s house with him a lot too: Dusty. Jae always comes as well seeing as Dusty is his older cousin and they are quite close. I think we get along with these families so well because they’ve had their fair share of trauma, just like us. We can relate to each other, which is nice even though it may not seem like it.

I still get frequent headaches, but it’s mostly when there are a lot of people in the room. It’s almost like I can sense their emotions. Call me crazy, but I really think that’s possible. I haven’t told anyone, except Rocco. He told me not to dwell on it too much. He said some term as to what it was, but I can’t think of it now. Not to worry.

I still sleep in the same bed as Rocco. I’m not sure why, but I just feel safer with him than in my room alone. I like the fact that I can tell when he’s tranquil. It makes me feel at ease. Which comes to my conclusion for all of this. I’ve come to the realization that all of the things my brother has done to make our life better was really for me. I didn’t think the power of brotherhood could be so strong. Rocco loves me and I know he’d do anything for me. That’s why he always looked after me when my parents were fighting. That’s why he always brought me to Dusty’s house when he was going, even if Jae wasn’t going to be there. Because he didn’t want me alone to witness the horrid scene of our parents fighting.

He still constantly asks me if I need anything. I could completely take advantage of this situation, but I really don’t think there’s anything more I can ask of him. And I think that’s all I can ask for right now.
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