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astrocat · 09-08-2021, 03:37 AM

SPOILER!!: I can’t think of anything clever to say either

When Ash felt Kinsay tense up beside her, she became a little more tense too. She hated their relationship. They were practically the same, except Kinsay was friends with Cambridge and Ash hated Cambridge with a passion. Kinsay was popular and Ash wasn’t. Kinsay was afraid out loud and Ash liked to bottle up her emotions. Maybe they weren’t the same after all. Maybe they were opposites. Maybe they weren’t meant to be friends. Maybe they were just meant to be sad.

Maybe.

“Yeah. I love astronomy.” She paused. “The moon is so nonjudgmental. The stars are so sparkly.” But that was only part of the reason she liked it. She liked knowing that the past three years of her life were so insignificant when you thought about how old the universe was. Surely it had seen worse. But she wouldn’t tell Kinsay about that. She’d just feel bad about it forever, and Ash didn’t want that. In any case, it would probably sound stupid to say it out loud. She looked over at Kinsay, not bothering to smile back. Kinsay’s half-smile wasn’t even real. Ash knew she didn’t make the other girl even a little bit happy. Why were they pretending? ”If I stayed out here, would you tell?” That was what really mattered to her. Or... that was what Ash told herself really mattered to her. It was hard to tell the difference.

09-08-2021, 03:37 AM	#5 (permalink)
astrocat Puffskein Join Date: Jul 2020 Location: New York City Posts: 2,127 Hogwarts RPG Name: Brandon Fox Hufflepuff Fourth Year Hogwarts RPG Name: Phoebe Calypso [s]Dupont[/s] Slytherin Second Year	Which came first, the phoenix or the flame? SPOILER!!: I can’t think of anything clever to say either Quote: Originally Posted by ArianaBlack After a few still moments (a rarity), Kins lowered herself to sit down, pulling her knees to her chest. It was probably a bad idea to be out here without any sense of time. She didn't plan to stay out here for long, but sometimes, she could get lost staring at the sky, admiring the moon. It was silly, but sometimes she felt like the moon was watching over her. It was a constant. Even when there were clouds, she knew it was there, y'know? Like a good friend. Or, um, something. And she was so caught up in all of this, that she hadn't even noticed someone else joining her on the balcony. Um. Not until the someone else in question said her name. Kins recognized the voice immediately, her muscles tensing up involuntarily as she turned to confirm her suspicions. She felt terribly on account of just how terribly she felt when Ash was around but. But they just couldn't talk. Because. Because if they did, then they might become friends. And they couldn't be friends. Because then Kinsay would lose her best and longest friend. It was a horrible, terrible situation compounding with lots and lots of guilt over things that Kinsay couldn't entirely control. But she was extra tired tonight. So extra tired that she didn't really want to put up a fight. So she even offered Ashley a half-hearted smile as she replied, "Hey." No one could be upset with her for saying hey, right?. "It's a nice night." The warm kind that sort of embraced you like a hug, y'know? When Ash felt Kinsay tense up beside her, she became a little more tense too. She hated their relationship. They were practically the same, except Kinsay was friends with Cambridge and Ash hated Cambridge with a passion. Kinsay was popular and Ash wasn’t. Kinsay was afraid out loud and Ash liked to bottle up her emotions. Maybe they weren’t the same after all. Maybe they were opposites. Maybe they weren’t meant to be friends. Maybe they were just meant to be sad. Maybe. “Yeah. I love astronomy.” She paused. “The moon is so nonjudgmental. The stars are so sparkly.” But that was only part of the reason she liked it. She liked knowing that the past three years of her life were so insignificant when you thought about how old the universe was. Surely it had seen worse. But she wouldn’t tell Kinsay about that. She’d just feel bad about it forever, and Ash didn’t want that. In any case, it would probably sound stupid to say it out loud. She looked over at Kinsay, not bothering to smile back. Kinsay’s half-smile wasn’t even real. Ash knew she didn’t make the other girl even a little bit happy. Why were they pretending? ”If I stayed out here, would you tell?” That was what really mattered to her. Or... that was what Ash told herself really mattered to her. It was hard to tell the difference.