 astronomizzle ♧ gryffinDORK | & the rest is drag ♣ #badluckDerf
Charles too had mixed feelings about his return to the Ministry, though he never doubted for a second his desire to resume his position. The guilt that he had let his people down, let down the future generation of the wizarding world, wore heavily on his aging body and even more so to his ageless spirit. Even heavier was that he was now a murderer, a line he had never crossed in his life up until this point despite coming awfully close once or twice in his youth. A murderer and his people called him a hero for it. Assured him that it was necessary to end the war and only an act of self defense. One that he had not even done directly and it was Hogwarts, in the and an in its own way, that had delivered the final stroke.
But Charles could not see it that way. To him, he saw a young man...one younger than some of his own children...who had lost his way and the world treated him cruelly. Charles had slaved over old documents and Azkaban reports, files on prisoners and those shuffled from one wizarding prison to another. He had found Lucien and Alphonsine's parents among those records, and it had shattered his weary heart to learn their fate. He could not carry the burden of the decisions of his predecessors and he would scorn none (save for a few obvious few) in their policy, but the ripples were reaching the shore now...and Charles could only imagine that this was the first wave.
There were policies to be revisited, absolutely. And he was eager to speak with Jake Upstead about these soon.
"...my boy..." Charles simply reiterated as his fingers lovingly massaged and dug into Kaiser's shoulder as he spoke on, unloading words that the Minister could sense he had been harboring for some time. It may not feel any better saying them, but better out than in. And then something seemed to shift in Kaiser, though just what...Charles was uncertain. But it was the 'I killed them' that truly had sprung Charles into action, and something in the tininess of Kaiser's voice revealed more layers to this guilt the young man was harboring.. The decreased volume and the nonverbal communication tugged at his heart so terribly that, in this moment, he cast aside the Minister entirely and enveloped the dark haired boy in his arms. An embrace much like a grandfather would give to their own grandchildren, or a father to a son, who had woken up from a horrible horrible nightmare. Which, in many ways, was what they all had and the fear of possibility of what could have been and what should have been done (all the 'if' scenarios) was truly crippling. And so his hand held the back of Kaiser head, gingerly laying it against the older man's shoulder while his other made gentle pats to his back. He would have rocked as well, but his own body would not have been able to remain upright in this situation.
And then his own voice became strained as he spoke.
"...oh my boy...my sweet boy..."
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When you’re stuck in a moment and your spark has been stolen .................................................. ...........
this is our time to own it, so own it.....................................
baby we were born with fire and gold in our eyes |