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OtterySt.Catchpole · 05-04-2011, 07:24 AM

A decidedly very dark moment in Harry's story, myself I'm partial to the earlier books because it was more whimsical and fun and downright crazy. I love crazy whimsy ... but whatever. I'm also a fan of things like Fables were you turn the sweet, saccharine fairy tales you grew up with and twist them into dark adult world narratives. So ...

I guess I like to have my cake and eat it too ... but usually with Harry Potter like Oz I'm more a fan of the softer whimsical side ...

All that said, this was a truly brilliant piece of story Connie and its nice to see your story short and concise. Your character changed over the course of the narrative, which is really all that's required of a short tale (or any tale). There has to be some kind of fundamental change ... and you did that magnificently with Harry giving him a reason to find the courage to go out and fight.

In keeping with the whole messianic theme of the books this is like Jesus in the garden before his crucifixion. I think you wrote it brilliantly and your (intentional or not) Biblical reference is brilliant.

You really are a very talented storyteller. You should try your hand at more short pieces ... I find it helps me learn to craft longer works. Because it isn't the quantity of words (too many fantasy authors make that mistake) but rather the quality of events in the tales.

And this tale is all quality. Nice job Conners.

05-04-2011, 07:24 AM	#8 (permalink)
OtterySt.Catchpole SS Featured Artist DA Poet Rupert is My Man! SS100 Triumphant Aethonan Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Lovin m wolf & dingo Posts: 18,891 Hogwarts RPG Name: Ottery St. Catchpole Third Year	I'm here ... better late than a Death Eater. Paris & Kellybear r luv :Read Otty 's fics:Gone With the Wind:I♥Rupert A decidedly very dark moment in Harry's story, myself I'm partial to the earlier books because it was more whimsical and fun and downright crazy. I love crazy whimsy ... but whatever. I'm also a fan of things like Fables were you turn the sweet, saccharine fairy tales you grew up with and twist them into dark adult world narratives. So ... I guess I like to have my cake and eat it too ... but usually with Harry Potter like Oz I'm more a fan of the softer whimsical side ... All that said, this was a truly brilliant piece of story Connie and its nice to see your story short and concise. Your character changed over the course of the narrative, which is really all that's required of a short tale (or any tale). There has to be some kind of fundamental change ... and you did that magnificently with Harry giving him a reason to find the courage to go out and fight. In keeping with the whole messianic theme of the books this is like Jesus in the garden before his crucifixion. I think you wrote it brilliantly and your (intentional or not) Biblical reference is brilliant. You really are a very talented storyteller. You should try your hand at more short pieces ... I find it helps me learn to craft longer works. Because it isn't the quantity of words (too many fantasy authors make that mistake) but rather the quality of events in the tales. And this tale is all quality. Nice job Conners. __________________