Why didn't Tonks listen? (How Tonks' life would've been different)

We learn in Deathly Hallows that Nymphadora Tonks wasn't supposed to be at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry when the final battle was taking place. Remus wanted her to stay away from Hogwarts and stay with little Teddy. Why didn't Tonks listen and stay away from Hogwarts? If she would've listened, what would've happened? This discussion is about how Tonks' life would've been different if she had stayed away from Hogwarts and stayed with her son if she didn't go and fight in the battle.

If Tonks hadn't gone to Hogwarts that day we can kind of figure what would have happened - Remus would have still been killed in battle and she would have been a widow. Teddy would have had one parent and he would have been able to know a lot more about his dad because Tonks would be there to tell him lots of things about Remus, but it would still be very sad because Teddy would still never have a daddy. But at least he would have his mom, and that would have been a really good thing! (Even though I still wish they had both survived.) I think Tonks would be sad the rest of her life, though, and always remember Remus. I'm not sure if she would ever marry anyone else or not, maybe a long time down the road, but I kind of thing he was the only man for her.

I, too, cannot see Tonks with anyone but Remus. She probably would have been incredibly depressed afterwards, for a long time. Can't you just picture her with somber, grey or white hair after that? Weird. Or maybe the shock of her loved ones' death would have hindered her metamorphagus abilities indefinitely.

Regardless, Teddy would have been happy to have at least one parent, methinks. It's still very hard to imagine her staying away from the battle though....so....I dunno.

The problem is, she would have gone into battle, that's just her personality, especially if Remus went in.

Ignoring that...we don't know exactly how the two of them died. Maybe it had to do with Tonks being there, or Remus trying to protect Tonks. So maybe, if Tonks hadn't been there Remus may've survived.

Teddy could have either one or two parents. If Remus had still died, I think Tonks would've been so completely depressed that she may never have recovered. She spent all those years trying to get Remus to think of her as an equal worthy of being married that I don't think she would recover from losing him.

I still rather that they both live.

Yea, I was thinking the same way. Perhaps it was BECAUSE Tonks was there that he died. So maybe if she doesn't that he lives and little Teddy has both parents who love him. Though, if Remus did die I think everyone is right in assessing that Tonks would have probably never have recovered from it. Which would be a bad thing for Teddy at the same time. Even though he has one parent if she's dwelling on the past, which is not healthy, it would show on Teddy as well and his upbringing. After all, even if she is her kid what would it feel like to him taking second place in his mother's heart after Remus. Almost like he isn't there at all except to reminisce and tell stories about Remus to. That wouldn't be good.

I vote they both live though, better all the way around

If I remember correctly(which I probably don't ) Remus was killed in a duel wasn't he? And Tonks was killed by Bella, I think.

I'd just like to point out that Tonks may have never found Remus, and the fact that they were beside each other in the end could be the work of a well informed person who was kind enough to put them together.

I agree that Tonks' skills and probably personality would have changed drastically if Remus had died. I think that would put some kind of effect on Teddy's own personality. He could have ended up a little more careful and less reckless.

First impressions: Tonks didn't listen because I think the drive to help others is just part of who she is. She was a part of the Order of the Phoenix, and even though she's a bit clumsy, it's VERY obvious that she is quite mother-like in terms of how she cares for other such as Remus and Harry. I think that alone, is a very strong driving force. Also, the fact that she would be sitting idly at home while Remus was off in perilous danger was eating away at her, and she felt like, as an auror, it was her duty to protect him, perhaps.

If she would have listened (assuming Remus would have still been killed), she obviously would be a very sad woman. I think Teddy's face would be a constant reminder of what could have been a very happy life as a family, and I think that she might even have a hard time controlling her emotions around him, which may have driven him toward his grandparents. I don't think Tonks would have remarried, and I think a lot of her powers would be impaired. I bet her patronus would be a wolf.

And now for replies:
I agree. I don't think Tonks would remarry. It seems like she was the type of woman to find one man, and fall so deeply for him that the thought of being with anyone else would make her sick.

That's a very good point! I can certainly imagine her with black hair to reflect depression or white or gray hair as a result of stress. Perhaps she may lose the ability to change her hair altogether simply because she is too far gone in her grieving.

That is also a very good point! As much as I hate to think it, could Tonks have been a possible factor in Remus' untimely death? I think Tonks is a very passionate person and acts on impulse a lot of time, and doesn't always think things through. Maybe this was the ultimate consequence of the culmination of not carefully planning her actions throughout life? Life is rather cruel sometimes.

Haha. Amen to your last statement. All in favor of ressurecting Remus and Tonks, say "Aye."

*awaits a chorus of "Ayes"*

No idea. I can't remember that well. Could be. It would be a very sad plot twist if Tonks was killed at the hands of her cousin's murderer.

So true! I think that they were lying together as a result of some kind being reuniting the two in their final slumber. 'Tis sad.

Nayyyy.xD


Don't shoot me-- I have an explanation! xD

First off, let's respond to the actual discussion. I don't think it's a matter of "why she didn't listen"...More so "why did Remus even dare ask her to stay away?"...xD

I understand the whole deal with Teddy, but come on...xD Tonks is the very last person to stay away from a battle THAT big. XD I think Tonks weighed her options and as much as she loved her child, I really doubt she could live with herself if she wasn't there. Mmm, which means I'm pretty much echoing what everyone else said but yeah.


Back to the Nay; I don't think I'd want either Remus and Tonks to come back to life...xD I just don't see it ending any other way. As soon as Mad-Eye died, I KNEW that she would die. xD As for Remus going on without her or vice versa...EH. XD Yeah, no--totally not gonna roll. The idea that they had a child also sorta foreshadowed them dying and leaving him behind. Or..maybe that's just my pessmism. =/ But, ehh...I sorta realized this early on and was settled on it...I honestly can't picture it ending any other way.



MIND YOU, Tonks is my second favorite character in the entire series. This isn't out of lack of love. Far from it. It's just my two cents, I suppose.

AYE!

*holsters gun*
Of course you're right about Tonks' personal choices.

Though, I'm a little less of an educated reader-I don't see things unless they're hinted on so strongly that it becomes a obvious outcome. That is part of the reason why the end of the best couple(personal opinion) in the entire series is so unforgivable to me.

If we took it, that neither of them had died, and Teddy had both of his parents to raise him, I don't think it would be the same. It's just too happy, which the series isn't really about, it's more about realism (that's part of the reason why I don't enjoy the epilogue that much XD).
If they were to live, what would happen to Andromeda? I have a feeling that, although she would have a grandson, she still didn't really have all that she could. Teddy might have brought Tonks and her closer together and allowed any disapproval of Remus to disappear, however, as she wouldn't have to be strong for Teddy, she might have had a similar withdrawal as Tonks after Ted Tonks' death.

^ I agree with that

Andromeda has Teddy to love with all her heart, which gives her something to take her mind off her dead daughter, and especially Ted. If Tonks was still alive, Teddy and Andromeda might not have had such a close relationship with eachother.

But that was the way Tonks wanted to go. She couldn't bear to stay safe while others risked their lives in battle. Anyway, she was an auror, it was in her blood to fight.

i think that Tonks is the kind of person who does wat she wants to, so if she didnt die in the battle next to Remus, she would probably have died in battle on a job.

^ all very good points said so far, but I have a few things to comment on as well as something to add of my own.


True, Tonks didn't really carefully plan out her actions through life... However, I don't think death was truly the ultimate consequence for lack of planning. As Tina mentioned, the child sort of foreshadowed the death to leave the legacy of another orphaned child at the end of the series. Lack of planning does not lead to death though; maybe irrational decisions, but never death.


Interesting question you also pose about why Remus didn't dare ask her to stay away, which I must pose another question: Even if he did ask her, which we don't know for certain, do you honestly believe she would have listened?

One thing that no one mentioned was that Tonks was a Hufflepuff. A hufflepuff is one who loyal, honest, hardworking, just, etc... Tonks didn't listen because she WANTED to help and live up to her duties as both an Auror and a Order member. She was loyal unto the end... to Remus and even her son.

You may ask, how is this fair to her son? In some regards, it's not... but at the same time, Tonks showed her son to be loyal and stand up for what is right... to not back down, ever. To believe. Some of the most important lessons to ever be learned.

Tonks's death to me, seemed significant in the whole design of the book, Remus died before he was physically killed, his soul was unhappy but Tonks would have been distraught, J.K had to kill her off!

Tonks would never have been happy without Remus....she would have been dead even though alive...

Remus loved her and the reason he warned her to stay away was because of that love...he remembered what happened to James and Lily and I don't think he would want that to happen to his family.

But Tonks, is a fighter, she's an auror, she's a member of the order and she's his wife. I don't think any force on earth could have kept her away from that battle. She's fought so hard against Voldemort and the Death Eater, they took her Dad, do you think she was gonna give up the chance to pay them back. No. She had to go there, she knew her help was needed. I think she is very brave for doing that, and I think that Remus knew she wouldn't stay away, but he had to try, at least.

I believe that if Tonks had stayed away from the battle and remus would still have been killed she would have been devastated and blamed herself [survivors guilt] and she probably would have ended up in a horrible state!

There have been some brillaint points about Tonks on this thread - that staying behind is just not in her nature, that she would have been a wreck without Remus and I agree with all of them. It is possible to die of a broken heart, would a witch be immune to that? I doubt it.

I would bring them back, but they are my favourite ship, so I would say that!

According to the Lexicon, Remus was killed by Dolohov, they are duelling as Tonks arrives and Tonks was killed by Bellatrix. I looked it up because I'm writing a ff called Bight Lights about Teddy, which has plenty of Tonks/Remus action. I wanted to be as cannon as possible for my flash backs

I knew they were both unlikely to make it to the end of the book when Remus offered to join HRH in the kitchen of Grimmauld Place. A soon as he offered I was thinking "Uh oh! He's had it!"

I tend to think that it was Andromeda who intially asked her to stay behind and Remus agreed, due to some sort of sense of chivalry. When he had gone and they couldn't gang up on her then she probably told her mother to look after Teddy and went to fight.

Teddy is probably supposed to be the Harry of his generation - the orphan. But the contrasts couldn't be more extreme, he surrounded by people who love him and brought up with magic. We know he has a good looking girlfriend at the end of DH, so he's not doing badly.