Fern had been sitting at one of the cast iron tables for quite some time. She had been trying to complete her Arithmancy homework, but she was stuck on adding two thousand million billion gazillion to her current sum. She wasn't sure how many zeros were in a million, let alone a gazillion. Was gazillion even a number?

Letting out a groan, the 11-year-old smacked her fist against the table, accidentally tipping her bottle of ink in the process (and startling a couple of birds into flying away from the branches they had been perching on). The black liquid spread across the white table and dripped between the iron curlicues onto the stone pavement below.

"NOOOOoooo!" Fern cried, desperately swabbing the table with the sleeve of her robes before squatting to soak up what had spilled below.

What WAS this place?!

He hadn't been here on his tour the first time he'd been around the castle. Uncle Jake had told him to go exploring outside before it got too cold and Benzi had told him he'd seen EVERYTHING, but apparently he hadn't. It was also not cold today at all, so Benzi had loosened his tie considerably and undid the top botton while allowing his shirt to hang outside his trousers. There was no one out here to tell him otherwise.

Was this where they studied Care of Magical Creatures? Or Herbology? Or was there a Study of the Outside thing? Deep within his own head, Benzi didn't notice the small piece of parchment dangle from the tree branch until he felt it scrape his head.

Huh?

Reaching up, he tore it from the wood and stared at the fancy lettering. "Ap-pa-re-ci-um," he said slowly, eyebrows furrowed. What was Apraprecium? About to start reading, Benzi startled as he heard a voice coming from somewhere ahead. Best go check THAT out first.

Still holding on to the parchment, he turned a corner to see- "Lake Girl!" he exclaimed, grinning from ear to ear as he walked towards her, completely oblivious to the mess she'd made on the table. "I've been looking for you!"

Fern knew that voice!

Whipping her head up angrily, the Hufflepuff's forehead caught on the rim of the tabletop. Clenching her teeth, Fern angrily rubbed the throbbing spot, unintentionally getting ink all over her fringe and skin.

"Lake Girl!?" she shrieked, staggering to her feet and taking a step towards the boy, "I have a name, you know! It's Fern QUIMBLEY!"

And don't forget it!

"Why were you looking for me?" She asked, squinting her eyes and crossing her arms. Was he here to laugh at her some more? Probably. Surreptitiously glancing over her shoulder, Fern scanned the topiary for the Cuthbert boy. If they even TRIED to pull a prank on her...

"Er. Right," Benzi said, dismissing the name thing. She was LAKE GIRL, and that was that. "You ok there?" he asked, pointing vaguely at her forehead and staring at the ink that now covered bits of her hair. It was quite funny, and Benzi grinned.

Not really afraid of her current stance - LOOK at her, she was covered in INK - Benzi pushed past the girl to take a seat on the white fancy looking bench. "You're funny," he replied, shrugging his shoulders at her before placing the now slightly crumbled parchment on the table. He didn't catch her turning to look behind her - had he seen it, Benzi might have laughed a great deal.

"D'you know what this Apracepium thing is?" he asked, gesturing for her to come take a look. "Just don't spill ink on it 'kay?" It was his new super cool piece of parchment, MUCH more important than her homework. If it even WAS her homework. Did Lake Girl do homework, or did she just fall into lakes and throw fits all day long?

"Yes," she answered just as dismissively, or at least attempted to, and pushed a chunk of hair behind her ear, streaking more of it with the ink. She hated that boy's smile, but at least he wasn't laughing...yet.

Jerking back as the mean boy shoved by, Fern stomped after him, and seeing him take a seat at HER table, grabbed her homework before he could try and cheat. "I was working here. You can get your own table. And what's 'You're funny' supposed to mean, huh?!"

Hands on her hips, Fern tried to glare him into leaving. But against her better judgement, she soon found herself leaning over to get a better look at his parchment. "Apracewhat?" Mouthing out the words as she read the fancy text, Fern said at last, "I knew the squid ate people."

Benzi couldn't help it. He giggled slightly at the mess that was Fern the Lake Girl. "You're funny! You make me laugh, mate," he stated, trying REALLY hard not to burst out laughing because Lake Girl liked fits and he didn't enjoy just staying quiet while girls had fits. He usually preferred to walk away or prevent the fits from happening in the first place.

See? SMART PEOPLE HOUSE.

Obviously, her request for him to leave didn't even register.

"What?! Wait, I haven't read it yet!" Benzi huffed, and quickly scanned through the fancy lettering, frowning since he really had no idea what was happening in this. "Is it.. Like, a newspaper or summa'?" he asked, looking towards her.

And then, "So better not fall in the lake again, eh? Best keep above the water level," because he COULDN'T resist.

"Hey! Don't laugh! Or, or, or!" Fern searched for a decent threat. It wasn't like she knew any really good spells. And she couldn't feed him to the giant squid; she was reserving that honor for the sorting hat. "I'll put bubotuber pus in your porridge, and you'll have boils the size of HIPPOGRIFFS!" Yeah. Yeah. Take that, mean boy!

"And I'm not funny! You just have a bad sense of humor! And are rude!"

Fern was done here. She put her homework into her sparkly unicorn tote and was reaching for the empty bottle of ink, when she heard his question. "It's a gossip column." Duh. She rolled her eyes. "Haven't you ever read Witch Weekly before?"

...

What. What did he just say?!

Eyes bulging, face flushed dark red, Fern made several weird choking sounds before finally managing to scream, "YOU ARE THE MEANEST BOY I HAVE EVER MET IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE!!!!"

He raised his eyebrows, waiting for her to threaten him with something horrible, and once her words were out Benzi contorted his face in disgust as envisioning the effects of the pus in his porridge. "That's gross though, innit? Good thing I don't like porridge myself," he grinned toothily back at her, thoroughly enjoying winding her up.

"I 'aven't been rude ter you! What's your problem anyways?! Being funny is a good thing!" the eleven year old exclaimed, blinking as she packed up her things. WHY did girls always TWIST things?! She was really being unreasonable. And catching a glimpse of her bag, Benzi decided that she was being really CHILDISH. Cue sniff of disapproval.

o________O "A GOSSIP column?! I dun- Oh 'ey! My mum reads that! She always likes to grab a few issues when we're in Diagon Alley but never orders 'em home 'cause she says magazines are uneducational," he rattled off, looking between Lake Girl and the 'gossip column' thing. Since when did they have this thing at Hogwarts?! This was super girly, and Hogwarts had a ton of guys too.

It was probably run by girls like Lake Girl.

"Nah, Cutty's worse than me Lake Girl, you know that!" Cue muffled chuckling.

Fern smirked in satisfaction as she watched the Ravenclaw's face twist in revulsion, but her gloating smile fell away into shock when he grinned. These were her best threats and insults! Why didn't they work on these boys!? What was she doing wrong!?

The 11-year-old swallowed back a frustrated scream and stomped her foot. "Yes you have! You don't call me by my name and you laugh and you point your finger and! Anyway, I don't have a problem! You -," Oh. She blinked as his compliment registered - he was complimenting her, wasn't he?

Fern didn't know what to say. She decided not to say anything and focus instead on the mean thing he had just said about her and the lake. Because even compliments couldn't make up for that. "Don't pin the blame on someone else! Who in Merlin's beard is CUTTY?"

No sooner had the words escaped her mouth when realization struck. "Wait. Cuthbert," she said the Slytherin's name with absolute loathing, "goes by Cutty!? That's so, so-" Cute? Innocent? "WRONG!!!"

Benzi found that the more she yelled, the less he was listening. He could hear her voice, and he saw her stomp her foot and RAGE and all that, but he really and truly did not register what she was saying. It was actually a sort of calming experience.

Perhaps he should get her angry more? No, wait, scratch that - she'd snap one day and girls were girls, even if they were less, er, groomed like Daisy McBorough and more inky? like Fern the Lake Girl.

INKY. LIKE THE SQUID. Opening his mouth to tell Lake Girl of his newfound giggleworthy discovery, he was cut short by her exclamation that she didn't know Cutty. "Oh, come OFF it Lake Girl, you kn-" and AGAIN he was cut off, because she'd seemed to have remembered.

Benzi laughed, a pure carefree laugh that bubbled up at Cutty's actual name. "Isn't that absolutely PRICELESS?!" he asked her, clutching at his sides. "Think you've got it backwards mate, CUTHBERT's the wrong 'un!" he pointed out, grinning from ear to ear. Though his face showed little pity, he really did feel sorry for his friend. Somewhere DEEP down. Because right now it was just funny. HILARIOUS. Downright ENTERTAINING.

Almost like Lake Girl's name origin. Mwahaha.

Fern yanked her tote onto her shoulder when the boy started laughing, positive he was aiming it at her. But then she realized it was about Cuthbert/Cutty/Whatever. In that case -

HAHAHAHAHAHA

So her laughing was a little forced, and some of it might have sounded more like sobs (nearly being devoured alive by the squid and then being laughed at was emotionally scarring, okay?), but after everything that nasty Slytherin had done to her, it felt good to be the one poking fun. She almost wished Cuthbert was there, just so he could see what it felt like. Almost.

By the time she finished laughing, the Hufflepuff was back in her chair and feeling much more cordial towards the small Ravenclaw. "Hey. What's your name, anyway?" ... not that she was actually going to call him by it. He deserved a name that would rival Lake Girl.

Well, THAT was weird. Her laugh sounded... off. Like, really bizarre. Like she was more crying than laughing. Sort of. Benzi eyed her, trying to see if perhaps she was attempting to mock him or something, but then she sat down and stopped that awkward laughing/crying thing she'd done so he felt much better.

... Weirdo.

"Benzi Rider, at you service Lake Girl," he said his name proudly, and did a mock bow towards her, nearly hitting his head on the table. "Whereabouts you from then?" he asked. Perhaps she had lakes there too?

Snicker.

Fern liked having people bow at her. It made her feel like a princess. Or a superstar model. Or a really cool girl band member. She decided that maybe, if Benzi kept on bowing at her, she would call him by his real name and not Super Shorty. Maybe.

"Yorkshire," she answered before adding "My family races winged horses." If Benzi had been up with the racing news, he wouldn't have had to ask that question; their best horse, Lastbiteofcauldroncake, had done incredibly well in all of his races this past year. Next year, he might be able to beat out Fizzing Whizbee.

But after the bowing, Fern was going to give Benzi a pass.

"What about your family?"

Jake was excited for this. It was Anya's seventeen birthday... and they were going to have a picnic.

He led the way across the grounds, one of his hands holding one of Anya's and the other carrying a basket. There was some good food in there... a bottle of pumpkin juice, two sandwiches, and some strawberries. The perfect birthday dinner, if Jake said so himself. Hopefully Anya thought so too.

"Here?" He asked, nodding to the ground. It seemed like a nice place. He let go of his girlfriend's hand and reached into the basket to pull out a blanket. He took his time spreading it out on the ground and sat down, patting the spot in front of him. "Take a seat," he said with a grin up at Anya.

Anya smiled as Jake set out the blanket. Cute boyfriend was cute. And he made her a cute little picnic. This was a great Birthday. Which, was good. It was an important one. She was considered legal in the wizarding world now.

Which was brilliant. She could clean her room with magic now.

Not that she would. She thought it was lazy. And that it didn't work as well. But... the point was she could.

"Thanks." she said lowering herself on the blanket. She tightened Jake's jacket around her. November meant it was practically winter. She needed to learn how to dress appropriately.

Once Anya was on the blanket, Jake started unpacking the picnic. He took two plastic cups from the basket and set them on the ground. He poured pumpkin juice into both of them before looking at Anya. "So, how does it feel to be of age?"

He'd loved that question last year when it had been him that people were asking. Being seventeen was no different than being sixteen, really. Besides the fact that you could use magic outside of school. That didn't really matter if you were in school for your birthday.

Jake set out the bowl of strawberries and handed Anya her sandwich. Such a gourmet meal.

Anya shrugged. "Absolutely no different." she replied. "That'll change when we go home next month though." At least, she figured that it would change anyway. "What about you? You like having a girlfriend that's legally an adult now?"

Okay. She might have lied about not feeling different. She did think it was kind of fun to say that. Legal. Adult. She was all grown up now.

She then helped herself to a strawberry and a sip of juice while she waited for a response.

"Yorkshire?! You're a northern girl! Aw, blimey, you had to come all the way to London just go back up here," Benzi remarked, frowning a little. "Then again with apparating s'not so bad - you apparated right?" he asked, eyeing her. Perhaps Lake Girl's parents where as out of it as Lake Girl was and they actually took a train down or something.

Now THAT would be dumb.

Wait wait. Did she say.. "WHAT?! There's such a thing as WINGED HORSE RACES?! That's brilliant! What's it like? How do they fly? How d'you even know who comes first? Is it just the horse or is there a rider?" he shot questions at her, SUPER interseting in this new thing he hadn't known existed up to this point. Mummy had never said ANYTHING about it.

"I'm a Londoner," Benzi leaned back in his seat as he smiled proudly. NOTHING better than London, in his opinion. NOTHING.

Fern nodded proudly when Benzi called her a northern girl and answered, "Nah. We drove. My dad likes cars." And Fern's grandmother had never gotten her apparating license, and she didn't do side-along apparating either. But Benzi didn't need to know that. It was Quimbley business.

The 11-year-old's jaw dropped when the short boy said he had never heard of winged horse races. Had he been living under a rock his whole life? But her shock was quickly replaced by excitement. He was asking all the right questions about Fern's favorite subject. "It's the BEST THING EVER OH MERLIN!!! Our horses participate in flat races; that's where they fly in a track outlined in the air, but there is also National Hunt racing, and that has obstacles! And first they parade the horses in front of everyone, and all of the horses are in the colors of their owners - ours' are grey and light blue - and then they are in the paddocks, and then someone makes a loud crack with their wand and they're off!! And we all watch from the grandstands, which are raised like Quidditch stands, but you can also see from the ground if you are a poor person. And everyone has to wear dressrobes and the witches all wear these huge hats," Fern took a break from flailing her arms enthusiastically to demonstrating just how big the hats were; she wished Benzi could see her collection, specifically her hot pink, sparkly one with the matching hot pink feathers, "And besides watching the horses race, there's also betting! And they fly with their wings! No one has really figured out how they're able to hold themselves above the ground, but it's just a matter of figuring out the right mathematical model. And you know who comes in first because the finish line's been charmed to record the first to cross. But just in case anyone thinks the wizard who performed the charm is a no-good, evil liar, there are photographers too. And YES there are riders. You call 'em jockeys. I'm gonna be one when I grow up. And if I grow too tall," She leaned in conspiratorially, "I'm gonna get myself a shrinking potion."

At last finished with her response, she gave Benzi a HUGE grin. All that talking had left her a little breathless, but she was ready for more questions. They had only touched the tip of the iceberg; she could talk about this all. day. long.

London. Well that explained why he didn't know about winged horse racing. Fern wrinkled her nose. But then she perked up, "Have you ever been to a fashion show?!" She'd always wanted to go to one, and London had the best.

"I like cars too!" Benzi grinned, thinking that a CAR RIDE down to London was WAY cooler than apparating, and DEFINITELY more awesome than taking a train. He now approved of Fern's father. MMHM.

He was about to continue the topic of cars when Lake Girl practically EXPLODED, talking a mile a minute, and Benzi simply stared. Second sentence in, her enthusiasm caught on and Benzi was nodding his head excitedly, drinking in all this previously unknown knowledge. THIS WAS BRILLIANT.

Wait. "You want to be a jockey when you grow up?!" he asked, staring at her. "I mean the racing is GREAT and all but why would you want to do that?! Isn't it better to do something that helps others and keep that as a fun thing to do?" Benzi was big on helping people. VERY big. He still had no idea what he wanted to do when he grew up, but it would involve helping people. That he knew.

"A FASHION show?! Lake Girl, do I look like I go to fashion shows?!" Benzi raised his hands so she could see the shoddy mess that was his robes, his crooked tie and undone top button. He would have stood up and shown her his duck tail, but that was too much effort. He DID like looking with Mummy in her magazines, on the off day when she'd want to read it with him. He wanted to look like the men in those when he grew up. They were so impressive!

At that moment, the parchment that still lay on the table between them shook slightly, catching Benzi's attention. Looking down at it, he watched with fascination as the letters jumbled together before forming a NEW, er, column? Gossip thing? "Hey! It's ch-" he began, signalling to Lake Girl to come when his eyes widened and he froze in his seat.

o________________O

WHAT.

... His eyes darted nervously up from the parchment to look at Lake Girl. He couldn't decide whether this was real or just someone taking the mickey.

"Well duhhh," Fern replied, giving an extra big eye-roll, "Why wouldn't you want to do that - get to train with a horse until you know it better than everyone, and you are best friends for life, and you win the race because you can read each others minds and trust each other? And you DO help others - you make people happy because they have something to get dressed up and cheer for, and some people, you even make them lots of money because they bid on your horse and your horse won." Fern had no idea what Benzi was thinking. It was probably because he hadn't ever ridden a winged horse before, let alone a normal horse. They would have to fix that.

Or not. Flinching at 'Lake Girl,' Fern spat out, "It was just a question, Super Shorty! And FYI - Dashingly Disheveled was the title of S.R. Griffin's Spring Collection!"

Everything had been better when he was still bowing down to her. "Listen. I need to do my- WHAT!?" Fern took Benzi's signal as a go ahead to grab the parchment and pull it over to her side of the table. Luckily, her ink-stained hands had long dried, so she didn't leave any marks.

The 11-year-old squinted at the gossip column. Benzi was right. The parchment had changed. And this new writer had terrible handwriting. It took her a while to decipher the writing, but as she did, her eyes grew wider and wider. Then she let out a shriek. "BENZI! Do you know what this MEANS!?"

Benzi shook his head. "But, you don't make money for everyone because not all of them will bid on the same horse. . . And that isn't helping people it's giving them a laugh, entertaining them. I want to HELP them, see," the eleven year old nodded gravely. True, he still didn't know how he was going to go about doing that, but it was a fact set in stone. Mmhm.

His eyes widened at Lake Girl's impromptu nickname for him, glaring daggers at the brunette and not listening to whatever else she was saying. "OI. Not cool. Don't call me that." And that was the end of THAT.

. . .

Er. Benzi blinked a couple of the times at the empty space that a second ago contained the weird little parchment, and apprehensively looked at Fern, waiting for her to sort of implode or something. Or for her to roll with it, and then he could be suspicious. Because this was really a very strange thing to be written on a parchment he found on a tree, and he wasn't sure if he believed it.

What he wasn't prepared for was Fern's actual reaction. "Um. No. Is it true?" he asked simply, eyeing her. He sort of wished Cutty was here so that he could ask him too. This was a SERIOUS thing not to tell a friend.

Hmpf.

"Yeah, but I'll be such a great jockey and my horse will be so awesome, if they don't bid on us, then they're stupid, and it's their own fault. And making people laugh and entertaining them IS TOO helping them!! Didn't you listen to what I just said? You're helping them be happy!!" Honestly, didn't Benzi understand that? It wasn't that hard of a concept. And he was supposed to be a Ravenclaw.

Fern crossed her arms, narrowing her eyes back at him, "Only if you stop calling me Lake Girl, Super Shorty."

...

Fern had gotten out of her chair and was jumping up and down in excitement, but Benzi's words made her stop and frown long enough to say condescendingly, "Of course it's not true! This is why you need to start reading gossip columns."

"What it means is," Fern pointed a thumb towards herself, "I'm POPULAR!" Which she had kind-of guessed already, when everyone showed up at her and Tallulah's compartment, but this! This was IN WRITING!

"... So you're gonna be an entertainer person? Like a singer or something but with horses and racing instead?" he asked, his voice sort of flat. He DID NOT AGREE. But she didn't get it. And he didn't want her to throw her inkwell at him or something. Ink took AGES to scrub off in the shower.

"Fine. Deal. You're Fern." He'll take it. He could handle calling her Fern as long as she didn't publicly go around saying he was short. HE WAS GROWING OK??!?! It just.. it was taking a bit. No need to REMIND him. Nor anyone else.

Wha-?!

. . . o_O "Okay La- Fern, now you've lost me. So people are spreading rumours about you, but you, um, are happy about it?" he asked, struggling to keep up with the obviously happy girl. The slightly TOO happy girl, if he may say so himself. "And can I have that back please?" It was his and all. She could go find her own copy.