Ahhhhh, how sweet is George?

He's adorable...

this story rocks my socks!! Thanks for the tip as well!

Loved it!
.:Adrienne:.

How sweet........wonder what shes so scared about? hope she'll be ok......PAMS!!!!

Em

Aww that was soooo sweet George is like the best ever.PAMS

awww. that was a great post. im glad you posted. please post again soon! good luck in track. what events do you do?

[insert predictable *squeee* comment here]
LOL
Very cute chapter! Selly is gorgeous, and George even more so. Can't wait for the next one...

Hi, I'm a new reader!

I really love this story ,although I do have to mention one thing, from the beginning. The whole "a box on four wheels" (or something like that) is very out of place for them. They know what a car is, haven't they been brought to the train station multiple times in one?

Other than that, I love it! I'm offically subscribed.

Call me Helene

PS: I am in college in a Professional Writing program, so I totally get the whole grammar thing. Even though I'm not very good at it, so please feel free to correct me at anytime!

I kept waiting and waiting to be a member so I could tell you how amazing this post is!
I read it a long time ago.
but I love it, and I love the twins lol

...My computer became screwy and posted twice by mistake.

Welcome to all my new readers! I'm glad you find George sweet; I love him as well!

Helene: Yeah, I think you're right about the whole car thing. I should have realized. Sorry! But thanks for pointing it out.

Tina: Oh, I'm mainly a triple-jumper, although I sometimes do long jump as well. I tried hurdles - but totally failed at it!

Random Fact:#10: Tense Consistency Remember that if you're writing in the present tense, don't shift to the past tense (or vice versa) unless you have a good reason to do so. For instance, in the sentences below there is no reason to switch from the present tense. This is especially true when writing papers about literature: wherever possible, stay in the present tense.
Confusion
In Toni Morrison's The Bluest Eye, the narrator is one of the few truly successful characters in terms of moral development. However, she was also seriously flawed in some ways. Repair Work
In Toni Morrison's The Bluest Eye, the narrator is one of the few truly successful characters in terms of moral development. However, she is also seriously flawed in some ways.-->Consistency of Tense and Pronoun Reference

And here's the post, enjoy! (Although I have to say, this isn't a particularly enjoyable part of the story, it is one that has to be written).


She slipped her small feet into red, strappy three-inch high heels. Making sure she remained quiet, Camila plodded out her front door and locked it behind her.

Her heart started its nervous pounding as she checked her watch. 1 minute to go. Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath (which did nothing to help calm her) she disappeared with a small ‘pop’ and reappeared in a lavish, richly-decorated living room.

“Henry…?” Her voice ventured, squeaking slightly.

A tall man emerged from the doorway. He had shiny black hair, combed to one side and a rather sinister grin. Dressed smartly, he sported a polo and casual khaki trousers. At the sight of him, Camila’s heart started pounding desperately.

“Evening, darling,” he drawled. His voice was slow and languid, like his movements. They reflected the fact that he knew he had complete control.

Camila knew it was because of the control she gave him that he stayed with her. After all, he was a power-hungry monger. Yet, it played to her advantage as well, which is why she never broke up with him.

Forcing a smile, she played along, “Evening.”

Henry’s long, pale fingers gripped her arm so tightly that it would bruise and steered her into the kitchen, but she didn’t utter a peep in protest.

“What filthy rags are you wearing?” He sneered as he led her through the door. “Everyone will mistake you for a scullery maid. And how many times have I said that you cannot wear the same shoes twice! Why must you be so hopeless?”

“Sorry,” she murmured, looking down. In truth, Camila was seething with anger. Her ‘filthy rags’, bought especially for this function, had cost her dearly. They were the reason why she couldn’t afford new shoes for this ******* event.

He sighed, and impatiently commanded “Get in! We’re going to stop by the salon on our way. I can’t have the …girl I’m escorting looking like trash.”

Again, Camila obediently nodded and got into the fancy silver car. It was a muggle contraption, but Henry found it very stylish to ride around in. He had three other cars lined up in his driveway, in case this one broke down, as muggle things are wont to do.

The function itself was the best part of the evening because Henry couldn’t openly insult her in front of other people. However, he still managed to whisper slights into her ear at every chance he got, not to mention manhandle her when nobody was looking. Still, Camila thought the evening went over much better than it would have were it just to two of them at home.

After she apparated back into her apartment and made sure Selly was soundly asleep still, she got into bed. Remembering her wonderful new job, new friends, and George….for the first time in many, many years, she went to sleep looking forward to tomorrow.

evil boyfriend much she so needs Gorge asap.I love still.PAMS

~Heather~

Hey,

No problem! I promise it's the last time I sound like a snob. Evil evil boyfriend! I don't like him. I would love to have her shoes! Post more soon!

Helene

don't you just love him?

Good post.
The evilness had to happen sometime in the story.
I really dont like him lol

George is my MAN

I haven't actually read the story yet. But having just skimmed the pages I can already tell it's very well written. Interesting grammar lessons as well. I'm a student English teacher so we get a lot (btw, a lot of people think a lot is one word, so annoying) of grammar.

wow!! this story rocks!!

I cant wait any longer!!! Please post lol!

Uggh, POST A NEW PART NOW!
Please. =]]
I love this, George is //so// sweet! The evil bofriend has to go.

Wow, has it really been almost a month? Gosh, I've been so busy I hadn't noticed. Okay, so now I need to go work again, as usual, but I wrote up a quick chapter for you guys. The random fact will have to wait - but I promise I'll add it later!


The next day dawned with drizzle pattering outside her small apartment, hitting the windows with the constant tapping of wooden blocks being struck together. Fog clouded the skies. Camila couldn’t see more than 4 feet in front of her. The air itself was sticky and it was one of those rare humid days. Despite all this, Camila felt that her spirits were lighter than they had bee in weeks. She was actually looking forward to the day.

As they bustled around the apartment in the usual morning rush, even Selly noticed the difference.

“Why are you so…so, happy?” Selly asked, crunching her cereal noisily in her mouth. “How come you don’t smile when you’re making pancakes everyday? You don’t make pancakes everyday neither. These are good. I want this for every breakfast. Give me more of the sticky syrup! I like them…” Selly kept up a steady stream of one-sided conversation throughout their breakfast, so Camila was never given an opportunity to answer the original question.

As Camila took Selly on the bus towards her friend’s house, whose mom was going to take them to school with the help of a portkey, Selly finally settled down.

Slightly relieved that the little brat had finally shut up, Camila put an arm around her shoulders and asked, “So, what’s got you in such a cheery mood today?”

Selly looked up at her and grinned hugely, making the large gap in the side very visible. You know the adorable gap that little six year olds have when they’re missing their front teeth? Well, this was nothing like that, because mostly it was barely noticeable. “Will I get to see George today, huh?”

Hearing his name, Camila felt her own lips tug upwards. Teasing Selly, she answered, “Maybe. Do you want to see him again?”

“Yeah! I like George,” Selly declared. Then, lowering her voice, as if revealing a large secret, she added, “He’s also very pretty.”

At that, Camila couldn’t help but laugh aloud as she nodded her head in agreement.

Selly huffed, “Why are you laughing at me? He is pretty.”

“I’m not laughing at you,” Camila denied, even as a couple of giggles escaped her.

“Yes, you are!” Her little sister would not give up.

“Nope!” Camila wasn’t her older sister for nothing.

“I’m not talking to you!” Selly decided, turning her back towards Camila.

“I’m not talking to you either,” Camila replied, mirroring her sister’s actions.

It was just about then that the bus screeched to a stop, throwing a couple of people forward and off their seats. Driving in London was always dangerous, and apparently their bus driver had not seen a speeding car coming from the side.

After ensuring that Selly was alright, Camila looked around to see a little old lady on the floor. She was trying to push herself upright and a small wooden cane was rolling around on her back. Her rich, flower-printed dress had ridden up slightly, revealing the pale wrinkled skin of her calves. Quickly picking up the cane from her pack, Camila pulled up the old lady by the arms.

“Are you alright?” She questioned anxiously as the lady tugged uncomfortably at her dress. The old woman nodded stiffly in response.

Some of the other passengers had gotten of and were busy engaging in a heated argument with the bus driver. Taking Selly’s hand, Camila too got off the bus (even though they weren’t at their stop quite yet) and made sure the lady was off safely. She was just about to turn and walk off in the other direction when the lady stopped her with a small hand on her arm.

“Dear, thank you so much.” Her voice was like her, small, fragile, but wielded with authority and dignity.

“Any day,” Camila replied. She gave the old lady a smile and was about to turn around the woman blurted, “Give me a chance to repay you, dear. Why don’t you come have tea with me this evening, at 5?”

“With me?” Selly asked immediately.

“Of course, with you too, child,” the woman replied generously.

Camila was on the verge of declining, but stopped her words. The lady was not asking her to thank her, she probably was just a lonely woman who wanted company. Despite the woman’s age though, was it safe? What if she had a son who was a mugger, just waiting for the victims to come obliviously home with his mother, lurking in the shadows to take his unsuspecting victim’s valuables out of the blue? (Not that Camila kept any valuables on her person, but still…it was the concept of the thing).

Shaking her head to clear her wayward thoughts, Camila reoriented herself. The lady smiled, sensing her anxieties, and said, “We can meet at the Tipton Hotel down on Boston Avenue if you’d like.”

No longer having any reason to decline, Camila accepted the offer and confirmed the venue. “See you at 5!” She called over her shoulder as she led a very curious Selly towards her friend’s house.

LOL!

I loved the "George is pretty" line! That was fantabulous!

I'm SO glad you're here!!! I missed your lovely fic!!!

I stuck a link to your fic in my siggie, just cuz it's so amazing!! LOL

Much love
.:Adrienne:.

PS Shan-Shan! I see youuuuuuuuu!

I agree with Moxie.The pretty line was funny.PLEASE post soon!!!!!!

The Tipton is from the Suiet Life of Zach and Cody.:-) Good Post.PAMS

~Heather~

Hey! OMG That's not a good sighn, she's meeting with a total stranger! Say no, say no! I seriously didn't know that you wrote like 3 chapters since the last time I checked, I will try to check more often!
-*~ Shirel ~*-