Ch. 28

Ginger sat behind the ornate desk with her feet propped up on it. “Well honey, that was fun but it did get a lil’ dicey at the end. Ah wasn’t sure Uncle Albus could pull it off without somebody getting hurt.”

Her brother was pacing about pretending to read the spines on the books. He wasn’t fooling anybody as the alphabets as well as the languages were long dead. “It did get a bit ticklish at that. But it had all the more effect on the enemy. If anybody had any guess where he’s off to, that exit distracted them from any clues he may have left behind. Oh, and how are Draco and Pansy?”

“Ah heard they recovered after a while.” (Giggle) “That was a nice touch you had, rolling them down the stairs. Probably the most exercise Draco’s had since Young Crouch turned him into a ferret and bounced him about last year.”

He stopped prowling as he came upon a book that looked like it was marked in the Roman alphabet. In fact the words were English. He mussed. “The Innocents Beyond or The Third Pilgrim’s Progress Being an Account of a Pleasure Excursion Aboard the Starship Quaker City.. Son of a bleep, he wasn’t stuffing me. He really did read it.”

She looked serious. “You want to keep a close eye on Ashley from here on. The lil’ worm is afraid of you and me, with good reason. So he’s likely to take it out on her, especially since his best efforts came back on him while attacking her.”

Tex growled in agreement. An unprovoked attack on any woman was anathema to him. But he was now undeniably in love with this little bit of Britton and he would be likely to act swiftly and surely on any thing that threatened her. “What is it with Snape that he stopped giving Harry mind-block lessons? Ah know his fondest wish is to see all Potters wiped from the face of the earth, but he’s never directly defied Uncle Albus. He still treasures the hope of some day teaching DADA.”

“You’ll need divination of an order higher than Trelawney teaches. Both of them are as tight lipped as clams about the whole thing. It must be something humiliating to Snape. But for Harry not to run about telling it, he must have come by the knowledge in some dishonorable way. What’s the status with our new head?”

He gave a grin that said somebody was not in as comfortable position as they thought. “She’s sitting in the DADA office looking important with a name plate that says, ‘HEADMISTRESS’. Filch is toadying like a champ and in payment she’s promised him the right to whip students and hang them by their thumbs, literally.”

“He tries any of that with me he’ll draw back a bloody stump.”

“With no body attached if Ah get wind of it.” If there was one thing surer to turn softhearted Tex to violence than threats to himself, it was threats to those he loved. “Everything she does, ever since she got here, seems designed to antagonize everybody, students and faculty alike. We’re all as nervous as long tailed cats in a room full of rocking chairs. And Ah’m not sure Ah want to know what the twins are up to.”

“Fred and George planning something?”

“They’re as mum as Harry and Snape, but they have that barely concealed excitement of the true trickster just before he pulls off the coupe de grass.” Just then Ginger’s tiny midriff gave a most unladylike growl, as if she had swallowed the house mascot without bothering to kill it first. Tex checked his watch. “Getting on to noon. Ah could set mah watch by your digestive track, baby.”

She got up and gave him a playful punch in the breadbasket. “So let’s see about resetting mah alarm.” Over the book case opposite the door was a wooden duck decoy. “Open up, Daffy.” The mouth of the duck opened and closed three times with the sound, “WACK, WACK, WACK!” A section slid back and the sibs exited.

*******

It was more than a month before O.W.L.s when Hermione told Harry and Ron to meet her in a long unused classroom. When they were all there and sure they were alone she brought up the “people saving thing.” Harry wasn’t the least bit impressed with the reference to Fleur’s sister Gabriel. “I got bonus points for saving her, remember? Dumbledore called it ‘moral fiber’.”

“Well at least you get results, not like Tex. I swear he got in the way more than he helped.”

“Yea.” Ron added. “In first year we probably could have gotten thru the giant chess set faster by playing the game like I said instead of him fighting them. And he got himself knocked out in the bargain.”

“And second year while you were fighting Tom Riddle in the Chamber of Secrets he was stuck in the castle waste system and blown into the lake.”

“He WHAT?” Harry exploded.

“Yes, I didn’t tell anybody because it was all over and you had beaten Riddle and were sitting down to the feast in your honor, but just after I was released from hospital I went down to Hagrid’s hut and Tex was there trying to wash off the stench. He was ‘such a great hero’ and ended up in the sewer.”

Harry wanted to sneer at Tex’s part in rescuing Sirius and Buckbeak during third year but Ron wasn’t supposed to know about the time-turner. Harry was sure that given enough time he could have gotten the recalcitrant Hippogriff to cooperate.

Ron added, “And don’t forget just last year when he vanished all together for most of the school year and left Hermione and me to be your only support in the Tri-Wizard tournament.

“Yes, Harry. You do have a saving-people thing but you’re sane and stable compared to that ‘hero’ Tex.” The three left for lunch.

After they were gone more than a minute a potted palm tree in the corner shimmered and turned into Ginger. She looked over at a large bulky file cabinet. She could feel the heat coming off of it. It shook and writhed and turned into Tex. Flames danced in his eyes. He ground out, “The WORD is Messiah Complex.” He looked so furious even Ginger was afraid to get near him. He stalked out not so closely followed.

In the Great Hall he nearly walked right past Ashley, he was so mad. “Mickey, where’re you going? Aren’t you going to talk to me?” When he turned to look at her the furry in his eyes made her jump back. “Eeek! Mickey, what’s wrong?”

He told her just what the trio had said. He added, “IN THE WAY? WITHOUT MAH HELP IN FIRST AND SECOND YEAR HARRY WOULDN’T HAVE HAD A CHANCE.” Like Harry and Hermione he wasn’t to mention the time-turner to anybody. Also he and Ginger had sworn to Dumbledore not to tell anybody about his little trip across the interdimensional barrier to investigate the murder of his other self in fourth year.

She was trying to calm him. “Well, Mickey, maybe there is something to what Hermione says. I mean, you said your self they weren’t your crises.”

“AH’M STILL NOT THE ONE WITH THE MESSIAH COMPLEX! AH’M THE REAL HERO HERE! HARRY STUMBLES INTO CRISSISE LIKE A BLIND GIANT AND GETS OUT OF THEM BY DUMB LUCK! AH’M TRAINED IN HEROISM! AH CAN FIGHT WITH ANY WHEAPON, OR NONE! AH CAN SURVIVE ANY ENVIRONMENT! AH CAN OPERATE AND MAINTAIN ANY MACHINE THE MIND OF MAN CAN DEVISE! AH CAN…”

“MICKEY SHULTZ, DON’T YOU DARE RAISE YOUR VOICE TO ME!”

He was shocked! Her reprimand just made him angrier! “DON’T TELL ME NOT TO RAISE MAH VOICE! AH’LL RAISE ANYTHING AH WANNA RAISE!” He pounded his fist on the table for emphasis! “AH’LL RAISE MAH VOICE!” (Thump) “AH’LL RAISE SHEEP!” (Thump) “AH’LL RAISE THE NATIONAL DEBT!” (Thump) “SO DON’T TELL ME NOT TO RAISE MAH VOICE!”

She yanked the chain from around her neck and threw the ring at him. “That’s fine with me, Michael Barabus Shultz. You just go and do what ever you want. But leave me out of it!” He caught the ring in mid air and stormed out.

Harry saw the end of this and thought now was the perfect time to try and make sure Ashley and Tex never got back together. “Ashley.” he said gently. “You did the right thing. You shouldn’t have anything to do with Tex, or his sister.”

She turned to face him. Her eyes were red and puffy and her nose was runny. Harry had an idea she wasn’t having an allergy attack. She shouted at him, “OH HARRY! DON’T BE AN IDIOT! CAN’T YOU SEE MICKEY AND I LOVE EACH OTHER?” She ran all the way back to Hufflepuff tower crying.

*******

That night a Slytherin girl named Dawn Bloom brought her sick owl to Hagrid. While he was assuring her that it would be fine in a few days there came from outside the sound of a thousand cats begin skinned alive. He opened the door to be confronted with the most appalling sight of his life, and he’d seen some doozies. There framed in the door jab was Tex with a jug over his shoulder, staggering about and shrieking at the top of his lungs.

“Shweeeeeet… Addddddddd… Ohhhhhh… Linnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnne”

Hagrid dragged him into the hut. “Here now, what’s all this about?” Look at you, Tex. You’re a positive sight. What’s gotten inter ya?” The answer to that question seemed to lie in the jug. He guided the sorry specimen to the great chair by the table.

Tex dropped and buried his face in his arms. He emitted a wail that would have given the castle ghosts the willies. “AH’VE LOST HER!!! SHE’S GONE!” He settled into wordless sobbing.

“Lost her? Lost who? Ya mean that cute lil’ Hufflepuff girl? What was her name, Ashley?”

Tex wailed in the affirmative. “Ah’ve lost her. Ah yelled at her when Ah should have been yelling at Harry and now Ah’ve lost her. Ah can’t face tomorrow.” (Sob, sob, sob)

Hagrid looked dubiously at the jug. “What in all creation have ya been drinking?” He pulled the cork from the jug and a bolt of pale energy sprang forth barely missing his head. He replaced the cork. “What in heaven’s name is this?”

“White Lightnin’.” Tex said with a trace of pride. “From an ancient family recipe.”

Mah pappy he made whisky
Mah grand pappy did too.
And we aint paid no whisky tax
Since seventeen ninety-two.

He resumed wailing. Hagrid said, “Now listen, Tex. I know what you’re going thru and I know it’s just awful, but drinking isn’t going to help. In fact, if some of the other teachers had seen you, you’d have been expelled.”

Dawn, though a Slytherin, couldn’t help being touched by this strange fellow’s plight. “Don’t carry on so. It may not be over. Go to this Ashley and tell her how you feel.”

“Now Tex, what you need to do is go up to your room, get right into bed and stay there till you’re good and rested up. Tomorrow’s Saturday, you can stay in bed as long as you like. Then if you like, you can come down here and we’ll have a talk.”

Tex got to his feet (not without effort) and turned to go. He then stopped and turned back to Hagrid, reaching for the jug. “Oh, no you don’t. You’ve had enough of that. Your first sip was too much. Now go.”

He managed to get across the lawn and into the castle. Going up the stairs several of the paintings made disparaging remarks. In front of a long dead head of Slytherin house he paused to get his bearings. “So, this is the magnificent American. How powerful, how mighty, how stunning, at least your breath.”

He continued into the common room and collapsed into a chair facing the portrait of Godric Gryffindor over the fireplace. As he stared up bleary eyed it said, “I’m ashamed of you lad. A Gryffindor faces disappointment bravely, not by trying to crawl into a bottle.” Tex spent the rest the night in unhappy sleep.

For two weeks Tex seemed less alive than some of the ghosts. He no longer came to the Great Hall for meals but snuck down to the kitchen to cage food from the elves. Classes Gryffindor shared with Hufflepuff he skipped until the teachers threatened to fail him, then did his best seem invisible. His class participation dropped to nil. The trio didn’t mind seeing him like this, figuring such a debilitated state made him less of a threat.

A week before O.W.L.s Umbrage began to worry that maybe she should lighten up just a bit. She’d heard some students talking about a dance and, Mr. Filch’s views to the contrary, gave her consent. Hermione thought it a meaningless distraction but the vast majority was delighted. Everybody was going, including Tex. He just didn’t know it. “Get off your lazy butt and get into your formal!” roared Ginger.

Tex made a waving gesture as if trying to brush her away. “Naw, dances are for couples.” He had stopped crying, but he still had little interest in life.

She grabbed his chin and stared him in the eye. “Then you’ll wait in the stag line like all the other slobs who couldn’t get a date. But you ARE going!”

There’s nothing like fear for one’s life to give one an interest in it. Tex dressed in record time and escorted his golden goddess to the Great Hall. When they got there just about every boy in the place swarmed Ginger, as usual. Tex tried to drift off to the side in the hopes of slipping out while she was distracted. The magic music box was playing the great classics of the mid twentieth century. One of the all time greatest started.*

She loves you yea yea yea,
She loves you yea yea yea,
She loves you yea yea yea yea.

Tex looked up. There, not twenty feet away stood Ashley looking just as stunned as he felt. Without knowing how or when, he had started moving toward her. He still felt scared; she still looked scared, but neither backed off.

You thought you lost your love
Well I saw her yesterday-yay
It’s you she’s thinking of
She told me what to say-yay.

His left arm went around her waist. His right hand met her left. They held each other at a formal distance, but kept eye contact.

She said you hurt her so
She almost lost her mi-yind
Now she says she knows
You’re not the hurting ki-yind

They were slowly swaying about the room. He saw her chin quiver. He felt a tire start down his cheek.

She says she loves you
And you know that can’t be bad
She loves you
And you know you should be glad

She loves you yea yea yea,
She loves you yea yea yea,
With a love like that, you know you should be glad.

After four years in this never-never land of Hogwarts Tex’s notion of “real” had been stretched beyond recognition. Still this had a decidedly “unreal” feeling to it. His beloved Ashley, the only girl in the world for him, was in his arms, giving him another chance.

You know it’s up to you
I think it’s only fair-er
Pride can hurt you too
Apologize to her-er

Because she loves you
And you know that can’t be bad
She loves you
And you know you should be glad

She loves you yea yea yea,
She loves you yea yea yea,
With a love like that, you know you should be glad.

The song ended. “Let’s step out into the garden,” he said nervously.

She smiled. “I’d like that.”

The night air was heavy with the smell of flowers. Tex was terrified that something he might say or do could shatter this fragile moment. But he knew what he had to do, what Godric Gryffindor would do when he had wronged somebody. “Ashley mah darling, Ah cannot begin to tell you how ashamed Ah am of mah self. Ah was furious with the gang and Ah took it out on you. Ah can only beg you most humbly to forgive me.”

“No Mickey. I should be the one to apologies. I could see you were hurting, pretty bad in fact. I should have tried to comfort you instead of joining your accusers. You’ve never tried to pretend you’re something you’re not. I should have known you’d get over it in a while if I just waited.”

He gently pulled her to him and kissed her lips as he stroked her hair.

*She Loves You John Lennon, Paul McCartney

Ch. 29

The portable swamp the twins had left was a source of constant amusement for all the students, all the more so as Filch had to punt them across. As Ginger and Tex were making a crossing she murmured, “Kinda romantic, really. Like the canals in the Venetian in Vegas.”

“Rather soothing and relaxfull.” Then he almost whispered, “Ah imagine Mr. Filch would enjoy it much more if he could punt us across American style.”

*******

Tex was scheduled for career counseling same as everybody else even thou he thought it a waste of time. He wasn’t going to work in Britton and he certainly wasn’t going to work FOR Britton. But if there’s one thing these people are good at, he mused, it’s bureaucracy. He would just go along, smile sweetly at what ever McGonagall said and when his seven years were up; win, lose or draw, he would go home to Graymatter and use whatever he had learned to make it even more the best ranch around. He had not taken into account how much he had impressed her over the years with his skills in certain areas.

“Good morning, Michael, please take a seat.” Sitting in the only seat other than the one occupied by her scrawny butt, he remembered the time, five years ago, when a counselor back home had said, “Take a seat.” and there was none. He later learned that this was a frequently used test. Some students just stood there, some sat on the floor, the ones the testers approved of spoke up and said that there was no seat. Being of an engineering frame of mind he had brushed a stack of papers off of the corner of the desk and sat there.

“So tell me, what would you say is your best subject?”

That was easy enough. “Care of Magical Creatures.”

“I agree. And Professor Hagrid says you’re the best he’s ever seen. And that covers a lot of territory. You also have my endorsement on Transformations and after Miss Granger you’re the best potions student in Gryffindor.”

His eyebrows went up. “Ah’m good at potions, mam?”

“Among Gryffindors. Since all Gryffindors do abysmally in Professor Snape’s class to get even a passing grade is note worthy. And as the O.W.L.s tester will have no personal grudge against you, you should do splendidly. You were planning to go back to The States after you finish school, and do what?”

“Ah’m gonna work on mah folks ranch. Veterinary magic has long been a tradition in our family and mah skill set seems to fit.”

“An excellent plan. But you can benefit by trying out your skills before then.”

“Uh, your pardon, mam?”

“I’ve taken the liberty of writing St. Bonzo’s.”

“The Magical Veterinary Hospital?”

“The same. They’re having a summer internship, for only the highest students. I have recommended you. They wrote back that you would be acceptable, if you received Outstanding in Care of Magical Creatures, Potions and Transformations and an Exceeds Expectations in Charms. All of which seem well with in your grasp.”

Tex was at a loss for words, a rare event indeed. The summer internship alone would be invaluable in learning to work with animals. And if he should prove himself to the point of going on staff for a few years he could make Graymatter the premier ranch in all of Texas, that is to say The World.

Professor Umbrage arrived before he could think of a proper response. “Hem, hem. So sorry I wasn’t here sooner. But it really doesn’t matter, all things considered.”

Professor McGonagall bristled. A gesture Tex found frightening enough even when he wasn’t on the receiving end. “And what, precisely, does THAT mean, Dolores?”

“Only that Mr. Shultz isn’t likely to NEED career counseling.” To their blank looks she answered. “Because he isn’t likely to HAVE a career. Oh, he’s clever enough to get by in class but the exams will weed him out of any program in Britton. After his school days are over he’ll go back home and find something to do, maybe muck out the corral or whatever cowboys do all day.”

Tex burned. Not only did the new knowledge that he had the potential to be a vet by local standards raise his self-esteem, but the deprecating tone the professor used in reference the work his family had followed for generations galled him. Before McGonagall could speak he said, “Ah’m sure you’re quite right, professor. When mah Hogwarts days are past Ah’m sure Ah’ll be heading back home and just mess around with the cows.” Turning back to his housemother he touched his hat brim and said, “Ah thank you for your time, Professor.” Then he winked with his head at an angle where only she could see and left.

Ch. 30

As Hagrid lead Harry and Hermione back to the pitch Harry had a question. “Hagrid, why didn’t you have Tex and Ginger talk to Grawp? They’re always bragging about how they can do anything and handle any kind of creature. Uh, not that he’s a creature or anything…” Harry thought keeping those two out in the forest would at least limit how much harm they could do.

Hagrid blanched. For the first time since Harry met him he seemed honestly ashamed. “I did, two weeks ago.”

“And they wouldn’t do it?”

“They gave me a blast like that horn-tail you had to face last year. Said I had deprived him of his freedom without due process or something. I had violated his civil rights. They just couldn’t understand that I was doing it for his own good.” Harry recalled discussions with Tex about doing things for somebody’s “own good” and realized that saying that had pretty much sealed the deal against the Shultzs helping.

*******
The friction with the centaurs was actually rougher than The Lady painted. Blain had drawn an arrow from his quiver and gestured as if to nock it to his bow. It was all Hermione and Harry could do to keep Hagrid from firing.

That night Hermione and Harry were up in the boys’ dorm talking to Ron. They were so intent they had overlooked Tex bringing in his new set of lifting weights. When she mentioned the threatening actions of the centaurs there was a load crash. Looking over to Tex they saw he had dropped several hundred pounds of iron plate. His face was a study in barley-controlled fury. The only time they had seen him this angry was last year when Hermione had told him that the house elves were slaves. He walked over to them and breathed, “No. You don’t mean… They threatened you?”

“Uhm, well yes. But Hagrid was there and…”

He wasn’t listening. He whipped his wand from its holster, pointed it at his dresser and as he released his holster belt shouted the command, “Accio Smith and Wesson.” The middle drawer sprang out and out leaped another holster belt, which wrapped itself about him. Only these holsters held guns, forty-four caliber six shooters.

Ron gasped, “Tex, those are illegal.”

He answered carefully as he tucked his wand into the inside pocket of his robe. “Ron, where Ah’m going legal and illegal have very lil’ meaning.” He adjusted the hang of the holsters, then stood up and reached for his broom on the rack over his bed. After it floated down to him he walked to the window. “If Ah get back, Ah’ll take what’s coming.” And he jumped out.

*******

The great broom swooped under him and soared for the forest. At the edge he landed and made a gesture. The broom flew up to a spot thirty feet up a tree. Waving his wand at it he said, “Camellia.” It assumed the apparent color and texture of the tree.

He walked into the forest to the area he knew the centaurs would be. They were waiting for him. “Ev’nin Magorian.”

Blain sneered, “Are all the humans of Hogwarts honoring us with their presence tonight?”

Magorian said calmly, “Good evening, friend Texas. What brings you to our forest?”

The boy’s face made even the hardened centaurs blanch. “Ah’m looking for a dirty side wider named Blain who makes a habit of threatening foals. Ah’m told he can be identified by the yellow streak down his back. It matches his belly.”

These American expressions were new to the centaurs, but Blain knew he was being called a coward. Without warning he reached for an arrow in his quiver. But he never cleared leather; or rather birch bark.

Forty-four spoke,
And he said lead and smoke,
Seventeen inches of flame.

The American stood with both guns drawn; smoke trailing from their barrels. Blain had just enough life left in him to look down and see a little red hole in his chest, right over his human heart. An even greater pain shot thru his equine quarters where the much larger heart was pumping out his life’s blood onto the ground. His legs crumpled and he fell.

Tex stood a moment, guns still drawn and eyes scanning the crowd. He was asking if anybody else would like to try conclusions with him. When none reached for arrows he blew the smoke off and returned both to their holsters. He touched his hat brim out of respect to the herd, turned around and left.

When he got back to the dorm Ginger had joined the trio. She had had a feeling that her brother needed her. When they told her where Tex had gone she knew he was in danger but also knew that there was nothing she could do to help. He hung his broom on the rack, took her in his arms and kissed her. She asked him, “What happened to Blain?”

He answered matter of factly. “Ah took care of him.”

Ron said, “Yea, but what did you do?”

With a voice colder than Christmas he repeated, “Ah took care of him.”

*******
That morning Tex and Ginger sat together at breakfast, not speaking, not smiling. Hagrid brought in a lidded leather bucket. “It’s, err, from the centaurs. I wouldn’t be opening it during breakfast.”

“Thank you Hagrid. Ah appreciate you’re bringing it. And Ah’ll heed your advice.”

After the big fellow left the trio forgot for the moment who their enemies were and clustered about the Shultzs. They were all saying things like, “What’s in it?” and “Open it, open it.”

Tex slapped his hand on top of the lid. “Ah wouldn’t recommend doing that.” They back off.

“What have we here, Mr. Shultz? No doubt something against school rules, I trust.” Professor Snape said as he reached for the lid.

Again Tex’s hand was on the lid. “Ah wouldn’t be doing that if Ah were you, Professor.”

“You forbid me?”

“No sir. Ah just advise against it.”

“Mr. Shultz, when I want your advice I will retire from teaching. Now I order you to remove your hand.”

Tex complied. Snape opened the lid, bugged out his eyes and screamed a scream such as grown men seldom achieve. He was still screaming as he ran out of the Great Hall.

The trio could no longer contain their curiosity. They ran up and looked. Looking up at them from the bucket was the head of Blain.

In their little hidey-hole in the library Tex sat the bucket gently down in the corner. He explained to Ginger, “Its the centaurs’ way of saying Ah did the right thing and they don’t plan any reprisals.”

The Texas Twister was the strongest woman at the school, including the teachers, but even she was a little queasy. “Then you’re, err, keeping it?”

“Ah have to. To send it back would be a colossal insult, besides disrespect to the dead.”

Ch. 31

The day of the first exams every fifth and seventh year was tide up in knots, every one except Tex of course. He and Ginger was sitting with the first years at breakfast and singing semi-ribald ballads. After a few minuets Page joined them, never one to miss a good frolic. Then Ashley, quite contrary to school protocol, came over from Hufflepuff and joined in.

*******
The stress of intense testing was wearing on all the students, Tex and Ashley as well as the rest. Also Ginger was under pressure supporting the two. One day during the midday break they went to the music room to relax their nerves. Tex pulled out his quartz flute as Ginger took her seat at a great harp. They began to play a soothing tune. Then they herd another sound join in. Ashley was at a spinet following right along. To their delighted surprise he smiled and said simply, “You never asked me.”

As they traveled thru various tunes their basic fears and insecurities began to peek out.* They settled into one song.*

Ashley was peering out the window as she began.
Rows and flows of angel hair
And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons everywhere
I've looked at clouds that way
But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on everyone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
I've looked at clouds from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
It's cloud illusions I recall
I really don't know clouds at all

Ginger took up the second verse. Tex was sure she was thinking of her brief encounter with Fleur last year.
Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As every fairy tale comes real
I've looked at love that way
But now it's just another show
And leave 'em laughing when you go
And if you care, don't let them know
Don't give yourself away
I've looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
It's love's illusions I recall
I really don't know love
Really don't know love at all

Tex rested his flute and let the girls carry the tune. His mind was on the way the trio was treating him.
Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say "I love you" right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
I've looked at life that way
But now old friends are acting strange
They shake their heads, they say I've changed
And something's lost but something's gained
In living every day
I've looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
It's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all
*******

When Harry’s patronus left the hall Tex was among the first and the loudest to applaud. It gave him a warm feeling to see so many people congratulating his friend, even Ashley. In fact, it looked like Ashley was more pleased with Harry’s work than anybody in the hall. It looked like… she was really… found of… Harry?

Tex was beginning to lose the warm feeling. In fact he was beginning to feel a ball of ice form in his stomach. The more Ashley clapped, the bigger and colder the ice ball got. He was definitely not happy that Ashley was so impressed with another boy.

Tex had had a brush with the green-eyed monster the year before when Ginger had chosen Hermione to be her partner in herbology. Never before had he felt he had to compete for somebody’s love. He’d felt anger. Now he felt desperation. Ah can’t live without Ashley. She’s all the world to me.

“Madam Goosegripple, Ah’d like to attempt a patronus for extra credit.”

The old lady looked up from her paper work. “Young man, I detest a showboat. I’ll let you attempt your patronus and if you succeed, I will change your grade from outstanding to fantastic. But if you fail I will reduce it merely acceptable.”

Ashley was watching him, now all he had to do was come thru with the goods. What am Ah doing? Ah’ve never practiced the charm. Ah’ve just read about it. Suck it up, man. In boldness lies your only hope.

He stood tall, brought the wand thru just as Harry had done and exclaimed, “Expecto Patronum!” Nothing, not even sparks. Madam Goosegripple was lowering her quill to the parchment. Oh, yea. You need a happy thought. When Ah met Ashley. “Expecto Patronum!” There were a few silver sparks. Uh, when Ashley first went out with me. “Expecto Patronum!” There was a small puff of vapor. When Ashley agreed to go steady with me. “Expecto Patronum!” There was a hazy cloud. His chance for St. Bonzo’s was slipping away. His chance just to take advanced classes was going. What was that look in Ashley’s face? She too saw him as a showboat. He was loosing her! This was worse that all the rest together. He didn’t care if he never got to the vet hospital, he didn’t care if he dropped out of Hogwarts. All that mattered was that he loved Ashley and wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.

Then he had it! The happiest thought of his life, the happiest thought in twenty life times, the happiest thought since the dawn of man kind. He brought the wand down in both hands as if splitting an enemies armored head with a claymore. He roared like an enraged bear. “Expecto Patronum!” The recoil knocked the wand out of his hands and nearly sprained his wrists in the act. Erupting from the wand tip was a bear, but what a bear. Not a brown bear, grisly bear or even polar bear. This was a great cave bear, extinct from earth for thirty thousand years. Its great slavering jaws were big enough to swallow a first year in one gulp. As it charged thru the Great Hall everybody jumped out of its way. Many an improper word was said that would have gotten points taken off, were not the teachers in as big a rush to get out of the way.

While Harry’s patronus was smooth like a waxwork or an ice sculpture, Tex’s bear was so detailed you could have taught anatomy from it. The only clues were the color and the eyes, which were not eyes at all but the flames of hell its self. It did not disintegrate like Harry’s stag, but held its form as it charged out the door, just as McGonagall was coming in. She paused to look at the form, then turned to the room and said, “Not bad, Michael.”

The crowed went wild. The examiner was giving Tex the highest score in the system. But he didn’t notice. He was busy being drowned in a sea of girl flesh, Ashley in front and Ginger in back. He mused, “A good thing Ma and mah aunts aren’t here. Ah’d collapse. Then he saw Harry and realized that now he could do one thing a little bit better than Harry. Now he could meet him as an equal. He held out his hand. “You beat me at the broom, Ah beat you at the wand. TIE!” Harry turned away in disgust.

*******

That evening Tex and Ashley walked hand in hand along the lakeshore. They both agreed that anything they didn’t have now they wouldn’t get trying to study all night. “That was a MARVOLUS conjure, Mickey. I’m so proud of you. There’s not another girl in the school has so WONDERFUL a boyfriend.”

“But I don’t understand why you even attempted it. You have high enough marks to get into St. Bonzo’s. What did you risk it for?” When he told her she looked amusedly disgusted and flicked his forehead with her index just as Ginger often did. “You big dunce. I could never love another boy like I love you. Even if he was a better wizard, which he’s NOT! Even without the patronus you have him beat eight ways to Sunday.”

He held her close and kissed her. In the back of his mind he still held the happy thought, the ultimate happy thought that had saved him. The day his parents had brought Ginger home and set her in his arms, a brand-new complete human being for him to love.

* Both Sides Now/ JONI MITCHELL

Ch. 32

When Harry got to hospital wing he was so distraught about Professor McGongall he did not immediately notice Tex was there standing by a bed from which moaned somebody asleep. Nurse Pomphry was telling him, "You may as well go back to your dorm, Mr. Shultz. Mr. Malfoy will not be awake until this time tomorrow, at the earliest. He nodded and headed for the door.

Harry saw how Draco’s right hand was covered with bandages. He bent his principles to speak to Tex under this unusual setting. “What happened?”

Tex gave a serves-him-right shrug. “Ah dozed off in an alcove after finishing the last O.W.L. of the day. Draco tried to swipe mah tablet.”

“Yea, but how did he get hurt like that?”

“Remember The Monster Book of Monsters Hagrid stuck us with in third year? Well Ginger worked out the spell behind it and Ah cast it on the tablet as a security precaution.” He smiled trying to get Harry to act the least bit human, but he was fighting a losing battle. He gave a “your-loss” shrug and left.

*******

Tex went back to the Great Hall hoping Ashley was still about. They had been so far apart during the test he wasn’t even sure if she’d stayed the full time. As Ginger had said, “She has a sharp mind and real talent.”

Speaking of Ginger, there was the sunrise-that-didn’t-watch-the-clock now. “Hi, baby.” he said kissing her.

“Mmmm, hi honey. You were out of here so fast you left scorch marks on the parchment.”

“Yea, seems practice really does make perfect. And we don’t have to worry about Draco for a few days. Remind me to tell you about it. Where’s Ashley?”

“She went back to her dorm after the test to lie down. Said it was really tough but thought she did well. Any news about Harry?”

“As a matter of fact Ah saw him up in hospital wing just a tick ago. He was checking on Aunt Mini.”

“Well that’s surprisingly sweet. Sometimes Ah think he and his buddies have lost sight of the human element. You decoded that message from Uncle Albus?”

“Yea, baby. And it’s not pretty. In fact it looks like things are coming to a head tonight. You got the weapons ready?”

“Uh huh. There stashed in a locker near tick-tock town. We’ll have no trouble slipping in and getting them when the fecal matter hits the floculator. Still be more comfortable if we had some super magic artifact of one sort or another.”

“Baby, that’s the one thing we Don’t want. That would be like letting your enemy choose your weapon for you. Those lil’ coffee grinders will be the biggest surprise in these parts since Ah zotched Uncle Sevie with the servo in third year.”

“Heh, heh, heh. You ought to call him that at the next meeting. Well, let’s go up for a tidy before dinner.” As they ascended the stairs she asked him, “How’d you come up with moniker like that? Uncle Sevie, for sooth!”

“Can’t take credit for it. Draco was talking about some Uncle Sevie while under anesthetic; think it might be his god father. Seemed tailor made for brother Snape.”

*******

On their way back to the tower they heard a hiss from behind a statue in the entry hall. There was Dawn. Tex hadn't been in the best mental state when he saw her at Hagrid's but her stunningly blond hair and piercing blue-green eyes had managed to burn thru the alcoholic haze.

After introducing the girls he asked her what was up. "Draco was bragging about Umbrage making him chief of the Inquisitional Squad and how they nabbed Potter and crew. Then he got all bitter about how she wouldn't take him along when Potter and Granger took her to see that 'weapon' of Dumbledore‘s."

Tex and Ginger looked at each other with utter bewilderment. He turned back to Dawn, his tone saying he was sure he hadn’t heard her right. “They took her to the weapon?”

“Yea. They were last seen going in the direction of the gamekeeper’s hut, but some thought they went past it into the forest.” She looked about to make sure she still wasn’t being observed. “I may be ambitious, but I’m not crazy. If Dumbledore says He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is abroad that’s what I believe. And even if he was a Slytherin when he was a kid, that doesn’t obligate me follow his scams.

Tex gave her a smile of sincere appreciation. “Lil’ buddy, you’ve just helped out yourself and your house along with the whole school. We thank you.” She surprised him by giving him a quick hug before running off.

Ch. 33

The sibs were flying toward the dungeon and the potion master's office. They spoke not a word. The walls have ears, even stone walls. But speech wasn't needed. They had been raised together since birth and could speak volumes with the least tic or grimace. Put into words it may have been something like: <What could Harry and Hermione think they're doing, baby? They don't know what the weapon is, certainly not if they think it's in the woods.>

<Beats me all up and down, hon. Uncle Albus just told us in today's message and he SURE wouldn't have told Harry.>

<If Snape doesn't know about this then we may already be too late.>

<DON'T say that! Don't EVER say that!>

The door to the office stood open. Snape was tossing things into a bag. "About time you two got here. Potter nearly gave the game away for fare; trying to tell me Black was in the Department of Mysteries. What's that phrase you yanks have? Subtle as a brick, that's Potter."

Tex nearly spoke Dawn's name out loud before he thought about the risk she was taking just telling him and Ginger anything. Snape may be a full member of the order, but without some more thought he wouldn't spill this news to Dumbledore.

Ginger was quicker. "We heard Harry and Hermione were taking Umb... Ah mean Professor Umbrage to the forest to see the weapon. What on the green hills of Earth could that mean?"

His packing came to a screeching halt. "Potter? Granger? The forest? None of that makes any sense. But if Miss Granger is behind it it must be well reasoned. But we can’t stand around wondering. Grab whatever preparations you’ve made and meet me at point seven. We’ve arranged a distraction for the watcher of that part of the flu system but it can’t hold for long.”

"Our stuff’s already there." explained Tex grabbing a couple of bags Snape had finished packing.

“Let’s RIDE!” Ginger shouted grabbing the bag just finished. All three scrambled for the kitchen.

Ch. 34


This close to zero hour it didn't matter who heard; Tex spared some breath to speak to Snape. "If Harry gets there after Volomort he..."

"I'VE TOLD YOU NEVER TO MENTION THE DREAD LORD'S NAME!"

Tex was incensed. "For the love of mercy, Professor. When will you...." And there he stopped. He was about to say, "Grow some gonads." But then he realized, This is the fellow who stares Voldomort in the face and tells him what he wants to hear. He has a right to be jumpy.

"What!" demanded Snape.

"Uh, nothing sir." After a few more running steps. "Uh, Professor? Ah, Ah apologies." Snape nearly missed a step hearing that, but said nothing.

"I thought you'd be dragging along your prize students; Miss Anderson and Miss Tonk."

"Negative, Professor. Mickey and Ah taught them a good deal, but neither of them has been in a combat situation or even simulation."

"Yea, we'll be plenty for the scenario even without Harry's band."

They burst in and the elves, as if on a pre-arranged signal, became oblivious to the intruders and busied themselves with normal tasks in other parts of the kitchen, parts away from the great fire place.

Snape hurled a handful of Flu powder into the flames and all three shouted, "The Department of Mysteries."

Ch. 35

When the cavalry arrived Harry was not too busy to notice that two full members of the order were not with them. Humf, I knew they couldn't be counted on. Probably ran off to tell whoever they're spying for. He gave little more thought to the Shultzs during the battle. At one point he was on the floor staring straight up a Death Eater’s wand. The fiend’s face showed an unholy glee at the prospect of rubbing him out when all of a sudden there was a small sound, “poot.” A red spot appeared on the criminal’s forehead. The expression turned to confusion. Harry's attacker fell to the floor.

More poots came from behind Harry, getting closer. Death Eaters were dropping, approximately two for every three poots. Just as the sounds passed him on either side he saw Tex and Ginger carrying oddly shaped light weight rifles. The two Texans were running in broken patterns making return fire difficult. They separated, drawing fire, as they charged into other rooms.

During a brief pause while the magic users held the assault at bay Ginger tried to locate her brother. She came to an open door where she heard “TOCK, TOCK, TOCK” like the slow, ponderous tread of a pall bearer. In the room she saw her brother’s back as he stood stone still staring at...something. She came around to see his face; a study in abject terror. Turning she saw an enormous clock face, perhaps thirty feet in diameter. They were on a level to see clearly the top few numbers. Scratches on the face showed where the hands had been turned forward and back many times. They now stood less than a minute before midnight. A near giant of a man with a face of Greco-Roman style came striding up in bronze armor. The enormous sword at his side glowed a dull red. He placed a hand on Tex's shoulder. He didn't smile, but his face showed compassion. "Take heart, my friend. It's not all that late." This returned him enough to reality that Ginger managed to drag him out of there. But then, women have always been stronger that way.

*******

Tex was out of ammo when he drew his wand. Riddle was about to drill Harry when the American accio’d the boy out of the way. The arch fiend chuckled evilly. “So, the ‘Great Hero’ from the all conquering United States confronts me. Just what do you plan to do to me, proud fellow?”

Tex stood , his feet slightly spread, with his hand near the wand at his hip, not immediately threatening, but ready for anything. “Show some smarts, boy. Turn your self in and come along quietly. Your room at the cross bar hotel is ready and waiting.”

More laughter. “No, I don’t think I’m quite THAT smart. And I’ve never done anything quietly. Um, I believe the expression is, ‘DRAW’.”

Tex was fast on the draw, but Riddle was faster still on the spell. The wand was torn from the boy’s grip. “And don’t think that ‘medicine bag’ will help you.” He slowly, maliciously brought his wand to bear. “Avada Kilvara!”

But faster than the green light could reach him the great eagle Sam soared into the line of fire with an ear-splitting “AWWWWK!” The bird dropped to the floor. Dumbledore rushed into the fray and took on the would be world conqueror.

*******

Tex couldn't come to the aid of his friend immediately; as long as the Death Eaters were about he dared not turn his back lest they all buy a ticket on the Stygian ferry. But it wouldn't have made any difference.

There was no medicine or magic for the green light. When Tex returned he knew this. The soul of this magnificent bird had gone on to join his ancestors. He cradled the small body in his arms and rocked back and forth sobbing.

Ch. 36

The Death Eaters were confined, Harry was back at Hogwarts, Dumbledore had given Fudge his half hour. The rest of the troops had gone about their business. Tex was still sitting on the floor clutching the small corpse and crying. Ginger stood by bewildered and terrified. She had first seen her brother cry a few weeks ago when he thought he’d lost Ashley forever. The sight before her now made that look like a passing mood.

A couple of summers back he had taken a bullet in the gut when the two of them held off a couple of hoodlums on the ranch. More than once he’d broken an arm or a leg. When he’d been rescued during the Madagascar incident he was near dead with asphyxiation. But she had never seen him cry.

He stopped making sound when Dumbledore placed an aged hand on his shoulder, but the tears continued to fall. “Mickey, it’s time to go back to Hogwarts.”

(Sob) “He’s dead.” (Sniff, sniff) “He’s dead.”

“Yes Mickey.” the old man said with infinite compassion. “He died a true hero, saving you and Harry from death, or worse. Now you must make his sacrifice meaningful. You must finish what we’ve started.” A wave of his wand and a scrap of cloth that had been torn from a Death Eater’s robe turned into a silk bag which he slipped around the noble defender.

The two sniper rifles glowed blue before taking the sibs away. Dumbledore looked about the wreckage that had been the Time Division of the Department of Mysteries. He sighed mightily.

Ch. 37

Harry was doing a bang up job busting the old man's chops and breaking his heart. He came to a point where he' d run out of things to say about himself and Dumbledore. "And that Tex! Sirius was DEAD and all he could do was weep over that stupid BIRD!"

"NO!" stated the wizard firmly. "Harry, I will not have you minimizing someone else's grief. Sam was his closest friend out side of his family. They'd been together ever since he hatched ten years ago." Harry didn't seem the least bit impressed. "True, Sirius is human and your god father, but you only saw him a few times in you life. In terms of time spent together, Mickey and Sam were closer."

He could see he was talking to a brick wall so he turned his attention to the window that over looked the forest. He saw Hagrid digging with three people nearby. He muttered a spell to extend his vision and hearing. Standing tall with arms held high and out spread was Ashley in a pale blue robe with a silver crescent on her brow. Her face was solemn but serene. At her feet was an American flag spread three feet by one and a half. Kneeling to the left was Ginger, to the right Tex. Tears poured down the boy's face as he sobbed. Ashley recited the prayer.*

You are both the Negation and the Existence
O Mother Kali, be gracious to me!
You are the atom, and ever-pervading
You are the Whole Universe
No praise is sufficient, yet Your qualities prompt me
To praise You!
O Mother Kali be gracious to me!

Tex and Ginger drew back the flag and folded it, reveling the silk bag with Sam's proud visage showing. The boy who feared nothing dropped tears onto the face before drawing the bag closed. He lifted the small form and laid it gently into the grave which Hagrid had just finished. The sibs stood, heads bowed. Ashley intoned,**

"And ye shall meet, and know,
and remember
and love again."

The three walked back to the castle as Hagrid shoveled the dirt in.

Dumbledore's awareness returned to the office as her heard Harry sputter to a halt. "What were they doing there anyway? They were spying for the Ministry, weren't they. Or that Bureau?"

"The WHAT? Harry, they were never spying for anybody. Unless you count spying ON the Bureau for US, The Order. They were doing the same job Arthur Weseley was doing from this side of the Atlantic."

"But, but... they were acting so strange. They, they were full members of the order and..." Harry came up short as he, trying to verbalize his fears, realized that they were baseless.

"Harry," the old man said unbelievingly. "They've been different since they've arrived. They ARE Americans, you've noticed. And just as Ginger explained to you your first night at HQ they are full members because they have the maturity to handle it AND the talents and contacts we need."

Harry was so stunned to learn the three of them had wasted the best part of their fifth year on a mistaken idea it was almost a relief to hear Dumbledore tell him all the mistakes the old man had made the last fifteen years.

*The Holy Book of Women's Mysteries Zuzana Budapest
**Eight Sabbats for Witches

Ch. 38

After Harry, Snape and the others left Ginger faded in. McGonagall looked apologetic as another hundred rubies dropped to the lower portion of Gryffindor's hour glass. “You understand why I didn’t say it in front of Harry.”

The girl gave her a look to say it didn’t matter, that nothing really mattered. The old woman followed her eyes to Tex standing by the archway, fading in and out. He wasn’t crying at the moment, but it looked like he hadn’t done much else for some time. He was staring out just toward the west of the gamekeeper’s hut.

*******

A day or two later the trio were going down to the hut to see Hagrid. Harry had explained all Dumbledore had told him (about the Shultzs anyway) and they felt every bit as foolish. He stopped as he saw Tex walk out with Hagrid’s arm on his shoulder. The big man wasn’t saying anything; he knew there was nothing to say.

Tex stopped short. He locked eyes with Harry. He still wanted to make peace, but he was out of patience. He had just gone thru the most painful experience of his life and had done it for Harry. This was the boy-who-lived’s last chance. Harry knew that Tex and Ginger had been on his side all along, but as always he was too proud. And Tex was in too much pain.

All of a sudden the American hurtled forward with his arms spread. Hermione was squashed between Harry and Ron. They all got their arms about Tex and babbled on how sorry they were and how grateful to the sibs. Tex gave his first real smile since the battle. He was close to crying again.

Ginger split off from Hagrid, folding her arms in disgust. “You MEN.” she muttered. “If we women didn’t push you nothing would get done.” She joined the group hug and made sure everybody was well lipped.

Hagrid had gone back into his hut and Ginger, Hermione and Ron back to the castle. Harry and Tex just stared at each other for a while. They were beginning to understand each other. They had both lost somebody they loved in the cause of freedom. Harry started apologizing again. Tex waved him off. It didn’t matter. So little mattered. He put an arm over Harry’s shoulder as they started back to the castle. “Yea, Harry. It’s not over. We’ll see them again. By and by we’ll join them around that big table in the Summerland and hoist a few while we swap lies about the battle.”
As usual, Harry had no idea what he was talking about.

*******

The school year was finally over and students were filing out, some fast and some slow. Tex walked with his arm tightly around Ashley’s shoulders. It wasn’t proper British decorum but she didn’t care, and he sure as heck didn’t care. He’d been trying for days to sell her on the idea of spending a couple of weeks at the ranch before his internship started. “But darling, you’ll love Graymatter. There’s every thing a body could want to do; fishing, hiking, canoeing, horseback riding...”

She put her hand to his mouth, just about the only effective way to stop his talking. “Sure’n it sounds a grand place. But me Da is expect’n me to help back home.” Then she employed the only other way to stop his talking.

When their lips separated he said, “What's with the brogue?”

“Tha’s how Ah norm’ly talk." She blushed prettily. "But you, well, Ah wanted to show you the real me so, so you know the truth." She looked into his eyes with worry and perhaps even fear. They held as much love for her as ever.

"Ah was born and raised on the Emerald Isle. Me Mum has a wee trace o’ the green on her mum’s side and inherited a small farm just after she married.” She shrugged. “It’s a small trace o’ me blood for sure, but it’s the culture Ah identify with.”

“But why not use it all the time? It’s every bit as lovely as your English accent.”

She looked at him as if she simply could not believe what she was hearing. “Truly, is America such a land of tolerance and diversity as all that? Me Mum warned me t’ always keep it hidden, lest some John Bull turn it against me. And sure’n it was the Goddess's honest truth. Me first year Ah was alone with Professor Snape in the potions room and let it slip. He hit the ceiling. He told me if Ah did’n drop out immediately he would go to the board and have me thrown out. Ah... well... Ah ‘made him see reason.’”

Tex’s eyes spread wide as he grasped her meaning. “You didn’t. You mean...”

She smiled widely and nodded. “It took Nurse Pumphry the rest of the after noon to put him back together.”

“But... why didn’t he expel you?”

“What? And admit that a mere slip of a girl of eleven got the better of him in a fair fight? Nay, he’ll take that to his grave.*

Well he made a big apology,
I told him then goodbye,
Saying, “When next you want a beating,
Write ‘No Irish Need Apply.’”
Some do count it a misfortune
To be christened Pat or Dan,
But to me it is an honor
To be born an Irishman.

Everyday he learned something new about this lovely lass and it was always something wonderful, something to be proud of. He took her in his arms and kissed her long and slow. “Well then, may hap ma Pa will turn me loose this year and let visit you.”

“Move along you two.” bellowed Ginger as she shoved thru with a wheel barrow carrying both her and her brother’s bags and the two bird cages (the larger one sadly now empty).

“And are ye no taking the train?”

“Nope. We’ve arranged alternate transportation.”

Ashley looked about to find what ever conveyance Ginger was talking about. The sibs eyes were darting from her to a space just a few feet away as if it held some grand secret. He gestured for her to stay close as he walked over to it, then took her hand. With the suddenness of an explosion but without sound or rush of air there was an enormous town car. The bumper sticker said, “Death is nature’s way of telling you to slow down.” and the license plate said "MORTIS." The driver was wearing something black and shapeless that covered his head and shoulder like a bed sheet.

Tex looked like he just had a mother of an idea. “Darling, would you like to be able to see the thrystalls?”

“Oh, tha' would be grand. But tis not worth it ta me ta see someone die.”

The sibs chuckled. Ginger explained. “You don’t have to. That’s an old wives tale, Ah’m surprised Hagrid believes it.”

“Yea, honey. You don’t have to see some one die, you just have to see death.”

“But... but... how...”

Just then the driver turned around revealing a face that was a skull. Ashley started to scream, but Tex put his arm about her to let her know it was all right. “Will you two move it? I have a schedule, you know.”

“Oh, keep your shroud on, Zane. You’re working your way to an early grave.” The blond nearly keeled over with laughter at her own bon mot as she walked up to him, grabbed him by the neck and kissed his fleshless lips.

Tex nodded to the line of carriages. Now, plain as day Ashley saw the leather winged horses pulling them. “Oh, Ah’ve got to go. Ah can’t miss the train. Me bags are already on board.”

“Mah love, where IS your folks' place so Ah can visit you?”

“Sure’n it’s a little place just on the outskirt of County Tipperary.” She grabbed one last kiss and ran.”

Tex and Ginger stuffed their gear into the car and climbed into the back seat. In the front passenger seat was another old friend. In a white robe with a large hour glass on his lap he turned to say, “Hi, guys.”

“Norton, what by all that’s Texas are you doing here?”

“Well, Mickey, I finally gave some thought to what you told me two years ago and I think you’re right. ‘If you’re too busy to help your friends, you’re too busy.' So I thumbed a ride with Zane just to gab with my two best friends in the mortal realm. How you been?”

Ginger chuckled deliciously. “You couldn’t believe it. It all started with... Mickey... Mickey Ah’m talking here.”

But her brother was in another realm of his own. He was smiling dopily and singing under his breath...*

It’s a long way, to Tipperary
It’s a long way to go.
It’s a long way, to Tipperary,
To the sweetest girl Ah know....


*No Irish Need Apply

**It’s a Long Way to Tipperary