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Finished Poetry Finished poetry threads come here to rest and be remembered.

 
 
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Old 04-21-2004, 08:54 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Hello all,

My name is Dawn, and I'm Not the best Poetry writer, but it's quite fun so I do it anyway. lol...



I will be posting my newest one some time soon.


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Old 04-21-2004, 11:30 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Hey all ,

Since there are quite a few fan works about Male Slash, I decided to write a poem having to do with Female Slash...


I first saw you in the great hall,
Your long blonde hair, your dazzling baby blue eyes,
Attracting many wide stares, you seemed to care not

'Twas but money and looks, were your only captivations,
You did not have one flaw, one mistake about you,
perfect, blinding perfection
I thought you were shallow, annoying, and boastful


Lovely you were, desired by most, a beautiful, delicate flower,
straight from a Queen's Court
Your smile, youth at its finest

An annoyance, an extra, a dissturbance, one two many,
you were to me before...
Until one unforgettable day, I was standing,
pensively, lost in my thoughts,
my homework, and what have you not

In front of me you stood, your eyes within mine,
I felt it..., the look you had come over,
let me know, at once, that you felt it too
You said, "I em zorry, but cud yu plz help me,
I need your... experteze, your wit, and knowledge.
You are so clever, plz oh plz help.

Said it so desperately, longingly..., Truthfully!
I stuttered at first, my response would be lame...
"S-sure, I said, I would LOVE to help you."
*Oh, Thank-you Wonderful Luck*, I heard my head speak

So surprised was I, I could not speak furthermore
You hugged me quite tightly, and thanked me, delighted
I wanted to put my arms around you, hug you back
You broke our *embrace*, turned around, then left,
my expression was a new one, quite stunned,
but changed, efflorescenced

Transfixed to my spot, staring after you,
at your retreating back, that golden-white
shield following behind

We got to know eachother, became close friends,
after that day, I could not keep away,
or neither of us could keep away...?

I thought that morning would be the only
ever day I got to hold you
For once, thankfully, I was wrong,
many more lucky days have come to pass such as that one

Your my pretty rose, my blooming beauty,
My flawless flowergirl
I realize now, there is so much more to you,
Happiness, adventure, sincerity, bliss

We are together, fanciful fun
A bookworm, "know-it-all", a perfect 1/4 veela,
We're argumentative, aware, and cherished

Standing by eachother,
A Bookworm, A Veela!
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Old 04-21-2004, 11:43 PM   #3 (permalink)
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hey!! its really good!!! write more soon and RR mine plzz lol
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Old 04-22-2004, 05:33 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Wow! Never thought about Hermione/Fleur shipping (oh, spoil it, didn't I? ). Probably Ginny/Hermione more... though that's probably because I love Ron/Hermione, but well.
Love the ending! :sorcerer: I had to go look of a dictionary for many words because I didn't know them but could enjoy it all the same and I liked it. Overly corny for my taste, if you allow me - that is, and I'm one to like subtlety~
=P
And it's cute. And, again, I never thought about the Veela and the Bookworm, probably because it doesn't sound too cannon. Ah, well, enough rambing, it's precious, and original! Good work, hope you update soon with more ^_-
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Old 04-22-2004, 03:15 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I at a loss for words! so I ll just say its excellent but it deseveres better than excellent like excellent times 10!
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Old 04-22-2004, 07:00 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Wow, thank-you guys so much... past_present_future_hermione1357... that was so nice, I almost weeped... lol... ok here's another...

This one is what I like to call a Break-Up poem... lol... Not that I know from experience... :whisle: !



Stupid

Don't look at me, like I'm stupid
I know what I saw
Don't tell me I'm wrong
When we :both: know I'm right

Why must you lie, why
It makes you look so dumb
I am Not making this up
I'm quite certain I am right

There is no need to lie, your trapped,
caught in your own game, in your web of lies
People, they talk, they whisper and gossip
I know what they're saying, I have heard them enough
I believe them, I know you are false, and not at all grown up

You try to make me believe and think otherwise, you try to cover up
What can you do, what can you say
I have been played one time too many,
This is the last straw, don't you forget it, I'm moving on

Your lies and deceit, have taught me a lesson, a long one to forget not,
never, oh never, and ever and ever, forever
My things are packed, oh yes, I'm gone

I hope you have learned, if not for a minute,
You can never be certain, you'll end up winning
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Old 04-23-2004, 12:41 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Dawn! your style of poetry is amazing! I love it! The female slash thing is wonderfully written, although I don't support it...^^
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Old 04-25-2004, 03:22 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Thank-you Tessa , that's huge compliment coming from you, The Maker of Fan Works.

I wote this one like two months ago...


Forever Lost in (False) Paradise
I am so scared of what I will find
I dare not open my eyes
My ears hear nothing, but the sounds of water, or waterfalls

Deep in thought of what I am doing in this queer place
They say it is but folly, "There is no such surroundings!"
What would their words be now, if I spoke of my news

I feel no one close by, save me and my secret cry
to help me, come save me
From what they call, This False Paradise



BTW, Save means *Except*
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Old 04-25-2004, 10:17 AM   #9 (permalink)
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I thiNk tHiS Is VeRy gOOd kEeP GoiNg
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Old 04-28-2004, 03:14 AM   #10 (permalink)
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DAWNIE!!!...I LOVE UR POEMS!!..dey r brilliant!!

*points at Dawnie*
Seee??..thats my sext Slytherin Dawnie!!..lol

Keep posting Dawn!!

:flowersmile:
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Old 04-28-2004, 03:16 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Ok, let's see how this goes...


Everyone is trying to put Harry Potter up against The Lord of the Rings,
What the Hell is your problem I say, go back to the shadow,
Can't you all see this boy with weird hair and bad acting skills,
will never be compared to the hobbit from the Shire,
All's Harry got is Fame and a scar,
"Yes, All's Frodo got is a measley gold ring",
Measley, you say, haha... are you wrong...
This hairy footed being will save your a-s-s before the end...
For his story has depth, *real friendship*, and true feelings...
not just a "brave" Gryffindork boy and a jealous gay Slytherin
Do you see it, I do... look it's the Fellowship and if you're a
true believer, they'll come for you
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Old 04-28-2004, 03:23 AM   #12 (permalink)
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*laughs her head off*
This one is gr8 Dawnie!!
LOL

Keep posting moreeee!!!!!!!!
:flowersmile:
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Old 04-28-2004, 03:24 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Gracias Hermy *bows*
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Old 04-28-2004, 07:27 AM   #14 (permalink)
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LOL
I'm L.M.A.O. down here, girl!
Great work! Look at all the praising you have got here! Your head will swell like a Ravenclaw! LOL
^___^
already tell my fav is Forever Lost in (False) Paradise, it's the most, err, alike the style I like the best. Plus like the images.
LMAO, agaoin, with the LotR vs HP!!!
But my Harry is forever - don't you dare touch him!!!

Frodo saved the day ?... yeah, sure...

Quote:
For his story has depth, *real friendship*, and true feelings...
not just a "brave" Gryffindork boy and a jealous gay Slytherin
Have to say this is my fav part LOL
But yet you have to admit Frodo and Sam...

OK, enough rambling, I've alreayd told you all this so I'll be waiting for more of your works, so, see you!
Nadia
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Old 04-28-2004, 07:32 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Bravo! Kudos! It's great! I love it! Hail the almighty Dawn! :wine: :hail:
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Old 04-28-2004, 07:36 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Thank-you, thank-you... did you know that I wrote that LOTR one off the top of my head...


Will post more soon... great, must fake once more... oh sorry... :whisle:
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Old 04-30-2004, 03:13 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Post soon dear ...we'll be waiting..mwahahaha
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Old 05-02-2004, 12:31 PM   #18 (permalink)
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good poetry
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Old 05-11-2004, 04:07 AM   #19 (permalink)
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hey dawn tis me leah mae i just read your poems and there really good i dont know if your still reading my poems but please read them btw i like your name too
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Old 05-19-2004, 03:11 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Thank-you all...


I really like this song, so I decided to write a poem having to do with it



Infatuation

I see you among your many cliques
your curly brown hair, your piercing blue eyes stand out
I can't help but think, can't help but wonder
what you feel like, smell like, taste like

My mama warns me, she tells, "I remember when I was your age...
just please don't fall for his sweet nothings...,
that's how I became your mother, you know!"
"Oh mama, I say, I would never fall for that!"
Though I hear the back of my mind ask, would you?

He notices me, walks over,
smiles, charming me for a life time,
Says Hi, and starts chatting me up
Feel so lost, in dreams, looking into his *soul*
Then I think, come out of my daze
*What are you doing, he is NOT for you!*

I turn around to walk away
He calls my name, I'm about to run,
escape his allure,
then he puts his hand on my arm, turns me around
to face him again,
I'm so caught up in this fantasy
I can't take it anymore , I'm beguiled by you
All I want is you, all I need is you
Your look inviting, let's go right now, leave...,
far away, leave everything behind...

You've sucked me into this world... our world..., I've given in...
Just hold me tight, and don't let me go ever



DISCLAIMER: The title and theme belong to the song writers,
producers, directors, Christina Aguilera, etc...
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Old 05-21-2004, 04:56 AM   #21 (permalink)
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ello love tis me leah again i like the one about that song its really good love keep writng ill keep poping in ok btw ive posted more poems to so please have a look see thanks dawn leah mae
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Old 05-27-2004, 07:45 AM   #22 (permalink)
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LOL, it's true that I didn't reply in here, sorry I honestly thought you hadn't updated

Ummh... random comment: I hate Cristina Aguilera. No hard feelings but never liked her too much, her style.

Your poem on the other hand... I like it, though def not my style either. The part about the mama-daughter conversation is great! So funny.
Think I'm a little love-sick - no, not in the sense of being in love *blushblush* but because I am not being able to cope with the love theme any longer... personal stuff =P Guess I'm getting old and tired.

Quote:
Then I think, come out of my daze
*What are you doing, he is NOT for you!*
I didn't get this part - probably becase I don't know the Christina Aguilera's song... or maybe I'm just dumb =P

Anyway, my only critic is the same: capitals and punctuation! It's difficult to tell what's being said some times.

Nice work! But I'm still liking the LotR vs HP the most :whisle:
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Old 05-30-2004, 01:28 AM   #23 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by She-Who-Is-Not-To-Be-Psycho!@May 27 2004, 12:19 AM

Quote:
Then I think, come out of my daze
*What are you doing, he is NOT for you!*
I didn't get this part - probably becase I don't know the Christina Aguilera's song... or maybe I'm just dumb =P

Bonjour all,

That part is not in the song, I added it myself. I mean, the girl is telling herself that, she must not give in to this guy's enchantment and that he is not the one for her, he's not right for her, lol. Hope you understand now, hehehe.

I haven't written any poems lately, but I did write one along time ago, that I posted in the Slytherin common room, so I'll post that one some time later today, I think, or tommorow.


Peace B)
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Old 05-31-2004, 09:40 AM   #24 (permalink)
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Very good DAWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 06-29-2004, 05:19 AM   #25 (permalink)
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KK Lovers, erm... I mean lovelys... :whisle: B)

I think I'm going to start writing again. I'm going to be posting one up soon, like perhaps tomorrow. Even though no one reads them, but... I'll get over it.

Ok, that was weird!


Namaarie~
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