I think that, by piecing together the little bits of what we saw we can ascertain that Draco was unhappy and very scared. Deep down I think that whatever any of the students at Hogwarts saw was just a front and underneath he was a scared little kid who had gotten in way too deeply.
Imagine having Voldemort at your house, watching him torture and kill, or knowing what he'll do to you if he thinks you're a traitor. I think he lived in constant fear and though he went home for the Easter Hols, maybe he would have rather stayed at Hogwarts (not that it was much better.)
Any of the bullying he put people through (I actually forget because I try to block out as much of DH as I can) during his seventh year, I think he did it out of fear. Before, he taunted and teased and hurt out of shear cruelty. He was mean. Pure and simple. He wasn't a bad boy; he wasn't funny except to those who could share that taste, like for instance, Crabbe. No Draco Malfoy was a cruel person and then... he got a taste of what real cruelty is.
I don't think the war was real for him until the summer before his sixth year. I think that was when he realised, 'Oh Merlin in Hawaiin shorts, what have I gotten myself into?"
He could talk the talk, but he couldn't walk the walk that went with all that talk.
He was just as scared of Voldemort as the rest, maybe more so even. Maybe he even hated pretending to be the bully. But he had to survive and that was the only way he could because he didn't know any other way. It's not like the D.A members would have said, 'Oi, Malfoy! You want some sanctuary in the Room of Requirement?'
No. No one was on his side. No one would have looked at him and seen a scared seventeen year old because all they saw was the boy who'd taunted and teased them for years; the boy who had let Death Eaters into their school and been the reason for Dumbledore's death. They didn't see a boy scared out of his mind, afraid of loosing his family and his own life; they couldn't have taken off their blind folds because they didn't know they had them on. They couldn't possibly know that Draco had only done what he could to try and save his family.
And of course, the Gryffindors and Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs all think, 'Well, he could have gone to Dumbledore,' and maybe they would have, but that wasn't what he thought...
So his seventh year, he was very much alone and frightened. I doubt he enjoyed it as much as Crabbe or anyone else who wasn't getting beaten. He still had to go home and maybe he'd be lucky and Voldemort wouldn't be there... but maybe he would be. Voldemort is the boogey man. He's that monster under Draco's bed; the one in his closet; the one lurking in the shadows, hiding in the darkest corners of his room.
I think, Draco just wanted that to end. |