Thread: Perfect - Sa13+
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Old 06-19-2011, 06:09 PM   #2 (permalink)
crookshanks_kitty
Ravenclaw
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 795

Hogwarts RPG Name:
Parmis
Fifth Year
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carrot lover (not) // torturously friendly // secret spy // HP nerd // <3 sparkles // who am I?

Ooh I really like this one-shot about Hermione. This part especially, which made me laugh:

Quote:
"God, why am I so freaking perfect," I literally scream at the wall. "Why can't I just be a normal kid."
It's just the way she said it with anger that makes it funny. I love your writing by the way.

Quote:
"No Luna," I say with the tears streaming down my face. "You don't. Everyone makes fun of me because I'm perfect. Even Ron did back in first year. People think being perfect makes you a freak. At least your unique and feel good being unique. I'm stupid freakishly perfect." I tell her trying to control my sobs.
Well she does have a point!

Quote:
She and the Slytherins quickly turn into Charms. I am about to also when a voice speaks up.

"I don't think your perfect."

I turn to see Malfoy himself. Oh I could almost have kissed him right then and there but I went into the classroom.
OMG! I was totally taken by surprise at this last bit. Hilarious! And it's even funnier since she's happy that Malfoy said "You're not perfect," as if that's a good thing.

Awesome one-shot! I love your style of writing. And it's nice to see something new as I haven't read many ffs that are narrated in the present tense. Good job!
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